Autumn Moon
by Dragon Falls
Summary: Uryu sealed up his emotions a long time ago, but the floodgates are opened when he is turned into a vampire. Being a vampire brings with it excessive emotions and desires that Uryu is far from used to. And it's only a matter of time before he breaks down and drowns in them. Ichigo/Uryu yaoi.
1. Chapter 1

**Hmmm… my first fanfic and I have to start with a warning. This is yaoi.**

**But there will be NO hard core sex scenes (sorry, go elsewhere for that).**

**I'll have some mild sexy parts though. And there may be rape. Or scratch that, I know there's rape because it's in this chapter (more than once too) but nothing hard core so I hope it's still OK for all you guys out there who prefer soft yaoi. There will be some Ishida/Ichigo fluffiness too so I'm sure it all balances out. **

**Erm… anything else? No, I think that's it for now. Well, hope at least someone out there likes it.**

* * *

Emotions were not something Ishida Uryu was very familiar with anymore. Yes, he still vaguely felt the chemical pulses but they were shades of what other humans felt and he could easily ignore them. At times he didn't even notice they existed at all.

"_Oi, Ishida, why don't you ever look happy?"_

That orange idiot asked that a lot. Happiness? Uryu wasn't even sure if such an emotion was really possible. Content and unthreatened? Yes. But happiness? The same kind that always made Ichigo's face light up in that ridiculous smile? Just thinking about it was baffling.

Anger... probably the only emotion he still felt with certainty. Mainly because the world and the people in it were just too noisy and irritating to ignore when all you wanted was a bit of peace and quiet to finish some stitching or read a book. Especially when some orange twat was peering over your shoulder all the damn time._ "Does that make you happy? Looks boring."_

Fear. Fear had filled his childhood. Hollows and their screaming victims, and the blood of ghosts covering the pavements. Ryuken's shadow falling across him every day. Don't put a step wrong. Don't drop a single mark at school. He had become so familiar with fear that eventually it had ceased to exist at all.

Now, that icy, horribly familiar feeling was back to twist his insides. He wanted to curl up into a ball in the corner of the room, like he'd always done as a child. Lock himself up in his tiny bedroom where nothing in the world could reach him. Such childish, immature 'solutions' that he'd never thought he'd be foolish enough to think of again.

Not that it mattered what he thought of now. He couldn't do anything since he was pinned half-naked to the futon by someone who was both much heavier and much stronger than he was.

"Don't…" His voice was trembling. So unlike him. And so like that stupid child again. "Please don't."

The room was dark. Darkness had always been a friend since it hid the world outside. The shadows of the approaching dawn played across the tatami floor; impossibly intricate patterns that had somehow strung from the tiny window and the wooden wind chime hanging from it; the one he'd hated and only pinned up because Inoue-san had said they were soothing. The wooden whistles were low on the tense breeze, barely even audible over the heavy breaths coming from the one pinning him down.

"Kurosaki…"

Ichigo laughed gently as he cupped Uryu's face. "What's with that look, Ishida?"

Uryu's eyes had adjusted to the dark enough to see the smile on Ichigo's face. He looked as he always did when he smiled. Stupidly happy with a knowing gleam that said everything would be all right. A moronic, naïve expression that Uryu had always hated and envied at the same time.

Discretely, Uryu clawed his fingers quietly across the bedding. There was nothing he could use as a weapon. And now that the autumn sun had begun to rise, there was a hint of red-washed light to the tiny room that teasingly danced over the silver seele schneiders out of reach by the door.

Ichigo lay on top of him, one hand firmly wrapped against Uryu's right arm to pin it against the pillow while the other softly stroked his cheek. "Ishida, I know you always say we're enemies, but after everything we've been through we're friends. We both know that, despite that dumbass high and mighty talk of yours. I'm not going to hurt you. So don't look so worried."

The smile turned into Ichigo's trademark grin. The goofy one that Uryu imagined would have made Orihime's knees wobble.

It sent another bead of sweat rolling down his bare arm. One of the many icy trickles that were making him quiver all over. He tried to feign a smile, though no doubt it was a pathetic one. Talk to him. Reason with him. He wasn't himself right now but he was still Ichigo deep down. Uryu licked his cracked lips, trying not to flinch as he saw Ichigo's pupils dilating as they focused on his mouth.

"You're right. We really did become friends. But Kurosaki, don't you think it's weird for us to be in this position? I mean, it's not the thing that two male friends really do, right? Let's go and see Urahara-san. He can make it so that you feel more like your old self." He tried to laugh. "And I can't wait to see the look on your face when you remember this later on."

"Hmmm?" Ichigo's eyes unfocused for a moment as he seemed to think. "See Urahara-san? Well, I know I am acting a bit different, but it's like I'm seeing clearly for the first time. We're similar, Ishida, so it makes perfect sense that we should be together. That said, you are the one who's always right – as much as I hate to admit that. Urahara-san… Hmmm…"

_Please listen. Please._ Another bead of sweat traced its icy trail down Uryu's bare chest as he listened to the wooden hum of the wind chimes interspersed with Ichigo's breaths. The shadows on the floor turned to match the spin of the chimes.

Ichigo suddenly grinned. "But I have a better idea." He lowered his head, bringing his mouth alongside Uryu's ear. "Why don't you let me illuminate you as to how incredible my new life is? You're nearly always right. This time I promise you that you're wrong. It'll be fine, Ishida. Just relax." Ichigo pressed his lips against his neck.

Uryu rammed his fist into Ichigo's shoulder, but he didn't even seem to notice. Uryu had always known Ichigo's strength was monstrous and now he really felt it as Ichigo pressed his whole body against him. His breaths were deepening as he sucked at the skin on Uryu's neck. Desperately Uryu dug his fingers into his shoulder. "Kurosaki…" More cold beads that made him shiver. This time on his face as they slid from his eyes. Uryu shook his head frantically as he tried to kick himself free, but Ichigo was pressed against him too firmly. This wasn't happening. It wasn't happening… He screwed his eyes shut. How typical that the only emotion he could feel so potently was the worst one of all.

"Ishida, I promise it'll be fine," Ichigo murmured soothingly. "Just stop fidgeting. You'll enjoy it. I'll be gentle."

"No, don't! Please don't. Kurosaki!_ Kurosaki!"_

* * *

_Twenty-four hours earlier._

Ichigo was screaming. Uryu had heard him scream before – they all had, but this time there was a different tone to Ichigo's voice. Fear. And it was so unlike him that it was chilling for all of them who stood watching. The sound of it even seemed to cut into Urahara as he froze, but he could only be still with horror for a second because he was in the middle of a sword fight with a woman with a long silver ponytail.

"Hado no !" Uahara roared. White kido erupted from his fingertips, illuminating the night-bathed street. It missed the target, but it was enough to make the woman retreat a few steps. Uryu watched as Urahara drew a shaky breath. He pressed his hat to his head and then he was away; his form no more than a flicker as he used shunpo to escape.

The woman tutted as she took after him. No doubt Urahara was luring her away. Primarily to isolate her from her partner, but also perhaps so that he wouldn't be distracted by Ichigo as he fought.

Her companion, a man with icy blue hair and piercing eyes to match, was the one pinning Ichigo face-first to the ground. Ichigo writhed against the pavement, groaning as he tried to swing his fists awkwardly at the man on top of him. Urahara couldn't help right now. And Ichigo's own efforts seemed futile.

As for Orihime and Chad… they weren't doing anything because they seemed too horrified to move. Orihime's brimming eyes were so wide that it looked as if they might split her face apart. She trembled, as if she was actually going to crumble to pieces in the street.

Uryu didn't know what they were feeling. Of course he was angry, but the pale shadow of his emotion would never come close to what the others must be experiencing. However, the fact that he didn't feel what they did gave Uryu an advantage over Chad and Orihime, and even Urahara. He could still think. And he could still act.

Arrows hadn't been working so he grabbed a seele schneider from his belt as he surged forward. Seele schneider wasn't designed for cutting but if he swung it hard enough, Uryu was certain he could decapitate someone.

Blue Hair paused in his actions for a second. Turning his head to face Uryu, he smiled with silver-painted lips and then elegantly swung his hand out. Uryu didn't understand the technique the man used to fight. It was probably some kind of Fullbring since Uryu didn't detect any reishi.

But having fought him for a few moments before Ichigo turned up, Uryu knew what those fingers did. He dived out of the way, using hirenkyaku to accelerate and move away from the danger. The air seemed to crease and there was a slicing noise. An invisible attack that seemed to turn the air into a blade. It had brought Ichigo to the ground earlier by slicing into his legs and was the reason he was so helpless now.

Ichigo… his screams had dulled into haggard gasps and Uryu had the feeling he must be gritting his teeth as he tried to silence himself. Why did he do that? To help the rest of them by trying to make out it wasn't so bad? Why did he idiotically continue to think of others even now?

Uryu stretched his fingers out as he formed his bow. He readied the seele schneider. But if Blue Hair moved… it could hit Ichigo's head.

But maybe that preferable to what was happening to Ichigo now. Uryu's eyes narrowed as he held the bow steady. Enemies attacked and tried to kill, which they had all come to accept.

They weren't supposed to _rape_ you.

"Ishida!" Chad roared. "You need to get Inoue out of here!"

Uryu felt the bow ripple as his concentration loosened. He glanced at the others. Orihime had slumped to her knees, still with that same awful, frozen expression on her face and silent tears. Chad stared fixedly at Uryu, giving him the suspicion that the Mexican had guessed his thoughts.

"Ishida!" Ichigo yelled. "Ishida... uh... get her... away!"

It made sense. Of course; Inoue-san shouldn't be seeing this and Uryu could get her out of her much faster than Chad could.

"Inoue-san." Using hirenkyaku, Uryu moved to her side and grabbed her hand. He ran, dragging her behind him.

"NO! No, Ishida-kun! I can help! Don't-"

"I'll take you to Urahara's," Uryu replied. "We'll bring Kurosaki back soon so you can heal him."

_So please don't look like that, Inoue-san._

Orihime shook her head fiercely, scattering her tears through the moonlit air. Viciously she tried to drag her hand away. "Let go! Let go, Ishida-kun!"

"Inoue-san." Uryu stopped and pressed his hands against her shoulders. "Kurosaki doesn't want you to see that. Urahara, Sado-kun and I will take care of him so don't worry."

Orihime pressed her hands against his arms, her tears falling to the pavement. "Ishida-kun… Sado-kun was screaming. Urahara-san too. You just stood. So calmly. Even now… you sound so calm, even though that man is doing that to Kurosaki-kun." She bit her lip. "I envy you. For keeping your head when I can't even stand."

If he'd kept his head, he would have whisked her away the moment it began and the lapse in rational thought was infuriating. Anger was, after all, one of the only things he could still feel with certainty.

Orihime didn't understand. And he didn't know what to say to make her understand because he didn't have time to comfort her right now. That said, he didn't know how to comfort anyone apart from to awkwardly pat them on the shoulder a bit.

Orihime snivelled as she took a deep breath, biting her lip so hard that it looked as if she might make herself bleed. "All right. I'll go to Urahara's, but I'll go alone. Go back and help him. Please… Ishida-kun…"

Uryu moved past her so that she couldn't see his face. "I'll go. But promise me-"

"I'll go straight to Urahara's. I'll be ready to heal all of you when you come back."

"Thank you, Inoue-san." He ran, refusing to look back. Fresh tears would be falling. Maybe she would even be sobbing now too. He wondered for a moment if she thought he was cruel. Maybe that thought would bother him later, but right now he could feel himself forcing what little emotions he had to shut down. A little more difficult to do than usual, but not overly so.

Breathing deeply, he came to a stop on one of the frost-dusted silver office blocks in downtime Karakura. They'd been fighting on the street directly below. It was about two in the morning so there was no one around, thankfully. He couldn't see Urahara but he could sense that he was still fighting, though the battle had moved about a mile across town.

He looked down to gauge the situation. He smiled, a flicker of relief amid the calm inside. Chad was crouched in the street with Ichigo in his arms. There was no sign of Blue Hair. Uryu concentrated. People who didn't use reishi took a moment longer for him to sense.

"Did you think I wouldn't notice you up here, Quincy?" said a soft voice. Typically it came at the same moment Uryu realised he could sense a presence.

Blue Hair stood about four metres in front of him, smiling as he wiped a line of blood from the corner of his mouth.

Uryu clenched his fist before he could stop himself. "You're sick," he muttered.

Blue Hair shrugged.

"Why did you do that to him?" Uryu heard himself yell. "You…!"

"You're beautiful you know. Angelic. I wanted you."

Uryu used hirenkyaku to move to the opposite corner of the roof, as far away from Blue Hair as he could be on the rooftop. He could hear his heart thundering; not something he was used to since most of the time he barely felt as if he had a heart at all. It was more noticeable here perhaps because the height of the building was enough to escape the sounds of the sleeping town below.

And the lack of sounds also made him realise how exposed he was. Again, not something he typically felt. Chad couldn't reach him up here, and besides that he had to protect Ichigo. If anything happened, Uryu would be at the mercy of Blue Hair. Normally he didn't think like that. His speed was almost unrivalled and it was enough to take on almost any enemy. He didn't feel anything when faced with Hollows.

But this time... as those calm eyes gazed at him, drinking him in, a familiar emotion that he hadn't felt in years was beginning to remind Uryu of how icy it felt. Fear.

"You're cautious. I suspect you're intelligent too. You keep your distance and I can see your eyes constantly assessing the situation and everything around you. Alas, you were too cautious and too quick for me or my wife to get the better of you, which is saying something because I like to think I have a turn of speed myself. I couldn't beat you. Your orange-haired friend is much stronger, but he rushes in without thinking. He was an easy target and so I settled for him. Though I wish I hadn't needed to."

Uryu formed Ginrei Kojaku and fired. Stone exploded as the volley of arrows pierced the roof.

"Of course, if I do happen to catch you then I wouldn't say no to having two sons…"

Blue Hair was behind him, his hand brushing lightly against Uryu's face. Quickly Uryu retreated with hirenkyaku. He held the bow ready but his fingers were quivering and his control over the reishi was wavering, adding an unnatural shimmer to Ginrei Kojaku as the bow rippled. He bit his lip. Calm. Emotions were useless in a fight. He'd tried telling Kurosaki that _so_ many times…

_He was an easy target and so I settled for him rather than you._

It wasn't his fault. He knew that. But… He felt his hand tightening on his bow.

"Blue, white and silver are beautiful in the light of the moon. Even more so when the person wearing them has such an expression on their face." Blue Hair sighed. "Such a pity."

"What is it that you want! You keep babbling about family and sons. Why did you come to this town?"

"All I want is company. That's all. We're not evil; we don't murder people. Your friend will live. I made sure none of his injuries were life-threa-" Blue Hair stopped and Uryu knew why as he sensed it too. The battle between Urahara and this man's 'wife' was finished. Her presence, like this man's, was tricky to sense anyway, but Uryu was certain it had vanished completely.

Blue Hair ran to the edge of the roof, and then again to the opposite side. "No..." he murmured. "No… she can't…"

"It's over," said Uryu. Grabbing a seele schneider from his belt, he readied it to fire with Ginrei Kojaku.

"Apparently so," Blue Hair replied. "Just as we had a family."

"You keep talking about that and now you think Kurosaki is your son? What do you mean?"

Blue Hair jumped off the edge of the building.

Uryu didn't move. A trap? Maybe he was going to-

A wet crunch. Uryu froze. Blue Hair's presence had vanished. Quickly he ran to the edge and looked down. Ginrei Kojaku rippled in his hand and then vanished as Uryu dispersed the reishi. Oh. It was over. He swallowed as he looked away from the red mess staining the pavement.

"Ishida!" Chad shouted.

He was sitting on the pavement below, still with Ichigo in his arms. Uryu was too far away to make out the expression on Chad's face, and he was thankful for that since it meant Chad couldn't see his either.

Hollow blood didn't bother him and neither did the blood of souls really. But human blood brought back memories he'd rather not be faced with. He clenched both his hands to force his fingers to stop shaking.

And why had that man jumped anyway? His wife died, but so what? Everybody died. It was a natural part of life and as upsetting as it was, offering yourself would achieve nothing.

As for the pain of the loss, well, that healed. Or more you just at least forgot the worst of the rawness.

Taking a deep breath, Uryu jumped from the building, using the reishi to form a hovering board to catch his fall. It was more awkward than it should have been. The reishi he'd gathered for the board felt weak and it made his head ache as he tried to remain focused long enough to reach the street. His own fault for letting the night interfere with his calm concentration. Clumsily he leapt to the ground beside Chad. He glanced at Ichigo. His eyes were closed and his face looked grey and strained, but he was breathing.

Pausing for a moment, Uryu turned to look at the reddened, spilled remains. He hated that smell, as well as the stillness that was so unnatural for something that should have been alive. It was hard to be certain, but it seemed to be Blue Hair.

"Are you all right?" said Chad. "What happened?"

"I'm fine. Kurosaki?"

"Passed out, but he's alive. Just the bite marks on his neck and his leg wounds."

"Bite marks?"

"That guy bit his neck. Do you know what he was?"

Uryu shook his head. His eyes were being drawn to the red splatter. That smell of human death that he'd smelt before.

_Sensei._

"Ishida, you don't look well."

"I said I'm fine, Sado-kun."

Urahara suddenly dropped to the ground beside them. His hat was missing but he didn't look hurt. He glanced at the body. "The woman is finished too. Kurosaki-san?"

"Alive," answered Uryu. "And Inoue-san is at the shop."

"Good. The poor girl for seeing that… but of course it's hard on you two as well. Forgive me for not coming sooner."

"You came as soon as you sensed we were in trouble. Thank you for that," said Uryu. To be honest, he'd been surprised that Urahara had showed up at all. They'd been in plenty of scrapes before and the shopkeeper had stayed at home. Uryu trusted him but he didn't depend upon him. That seemed the best way to keep him.

"Urahara-san… that blue-haired man killed himself," said Uryu. "Is it over? Or has he planned for something else?"

"You find it hard to believe he just couldn't live without his wife?"

"I don't believe in that kind of behaviour outside of fiction, Urahara-san."

"How unromantic you are, Ishida-san. I don't believe either of them will return. I also think I may know what they were."

"Ichigo is our concern," said Chad. "If they're not coming back, they don't matter"

"Actually there is something we do need to be concerned about," Urahara muttered. "But for now we need to heal his physical wounds. As for the… psychological side. Well, that will be up to Kurosaki-san."


	2. Chapter 2

**Oh! Thank you for the reviews! Didn't really expect any on the first chapter so it was a nice surprise!**

**Gemini24 - you will have your wish in a future chapter. Oh I promise you will... and it will be worth much more detail when it comes. )**

**The next update will be in a week - maybe a little longer, but hopefully there's enough here now to kinda get this story rolling a bit more. I hope you enjoy. This is sixteen pages long!**

**Oh, just to give you an idea, I'm aiming for maybe 12-15 chapters overall. I'm quite a fast writer so I'll try not to make you wait too long between updates.**

* * *

"I don't believe in things like that outside of fiction."

"Says a man who sees spirits and slays Hollows with a bow made from spiritual energy. Considering everything you've seen in just seventeen years of living you surprise me, Ishida-san."

Uryu didn't move. There was no flicker of an amused smile on Urahara's face that said he was joking. "Vampires?" Uryu repeated.

"They're incredibly rare," said Urahara. "There are perhaps only a few hundred in the entire world. I've never encountered one myself, but I have studied them. They're an interesting species."

"Then… then… then Kurosaki-kun has been turned into a vampire?" Orihime gasped. "He was bitten! And-"

Urahara pressed a finger to his lips, a silent reminder that Jinta and Ururu were asleep in the adjacent room. They were seated around the wooden table in the lounge of the Urahara shop – Uryu, Orihime, Chad and Urahara. Ichigo had been returned to his normal body (which of course he'd just left lying in a street) and was sleeping in the room at the back with Tessai keeping watch. For some odd reason, Uryu had thought about sitting in the room with him for a bit, but it was a useless action and weird too when it probably should be someone like Inoue-san sitting with him.

The warmth of the lounge and the yellow lamplight, so much friendlier than the chill of the white moonlight outside, combined with the soothing smell of hot green tea seemed to have exercised their effects. Orihime had ceased her crying, although her face was still marred by the shadows of her earlier despair, and Chad's enormous shoulders were back and relaxed.

Or maybe they weren't relaxed at all. Uryu found it difficult to believe that they could be calm when his own usually settled state was disturbed. He wanted to pace, not sit, but that wasn't something he did when other people were around because pacing gave away agitation. However, his fingers clenched every now and then discretely against the warm mug in his hands as Blue Hair's silver smile flickered into his memory, his hips thrusting and Ichigo-

His fingers clenched against the ceramic mug so tightly they hurt.

While Orihime had been tearfully healing Ichigo, Urahara had repeated the same words over and over again. Ichigo was going to live. No matter how awful the night's events were, they were all alive.

Uryu wasn't sure how much consolation that was. What was better? Waking up with a missing memory (since spirits didn't seem to remember the point of their death) or waking up with the memory of being pressed down against the ground?

"I haven't performed an extensive analysis," Urahara said quietly, "but a simple blood test was enough to confirm that there are a number of new antibodies and proteins circulating in his body. We'll see how Kurosaki-san is when he wakes, but I believe he will be a vampire."

"But how is going to live? What happens when the sun comes up?" said Orihime. "How will he go to school? And what about-"

"Inoue-san." Uryu cut her off as her voice started to rise and quiver, like it always did when panic crept in. He had a headache and her voice was grating. He didn't expect her to pretend nothing was wrong, but misery was a useless feeling right now, particularly when there was so much to take in and think about.

Uryu wasn't as calm as they all thought. Anger was something he felt frequently. Orihime laughed when he argued with Ichigo. She wouldn't laugh if she realised just how many mugs and other breakables Uryu had smashed in his apartment. And those breakages happened when he didn't feel half as bad as he did now.

Grate on him too much, shout too much right now, and they'd find out exactly what he could be like.

"Inoue, we shouldn't panic," said Chad. Uryu couldn't be sure, but he thought he saw Chad glance at him for the smallest moment, those deep eyes gauging his mood. Chad was quiet, but Uryu had noted that he had a way of noting what people were really like behind their masks. Chad had also commented more than once about the cuts on Uryu's hands; shadows of an angry moment largely concealed among the broken pottery in the bin.

"Urahara-san, what do we do now?" Chad asked.

"I've sent a message to Soul Society. As far as I know, there is no cure, but progress may have been made during the years I've been gone.

"And what exactly do you mean by vampire?" said Uryu. "I fail to believe that they really are how manga describe them."

"They have fangs," said Orihime. "They bite people and suck blood and they lust after young women-"

"Inoue-san," Uryu said, forcing his voice to remain level and fighting the urge to rub his temples as the pitch of her voice started to rise. "Urahara-san, you seem to know a lot about them."

"Of course. I love vampires. They have fangs, they bite people and suck blood and lust after-"

Uryu glared at him, his fingers hardening against the mug.

Urahara laughed. Nervously though as his Uryu's eyes drilled into him. Uryu had noted that Urahara didn't seem to like the blue stare, so it was something he took advantage of. Urahara cleared his throat. "Well, a fair portion of what we read in manga or see in films is true. The good news is that vampires don't crumble in sunlight, which would be a huge concern. However, they do need blood. Fortunately, vampires do not bite just anyone. They will find one person to partner with – one person and one person alone. The resulting vampire couple will be dependent on one another, both emotionally and in terms of blood supply. If one dies-"

"The other is apparently stupid enough to jump off a building," said Uryu.

"How horrible," Orihime murmured.

"Vampire couples have a very strong attachment to one another. A dead partner will never be replaced so it's either die of a broken heart or die of starvation," said Urahara. "There are many romantic stories of vampires in literature, much of which can be traced back to truth. Tessai-san, believe it or not, is an avid reader of romantic vampire stories."

Uryu really didn't need to know that. "So why did that man bite Kurosaki if he already had a wife?"

"Because couples desire children, Ishida-san. Vampires are sterile. Many are content to live their life solely as a couple, but some wish for children. If they want to add to their family then it has to be through… let's call it 'adoption'. Age doesn't matter. The adopted child could be an infant, teenager, adult… vampires have no preference."

"They wanted Kurosaki-kun as their child," said Orihime softly.

The room was quiet as everyone stared at their tea mug, or the floor, or their feet. Or anything apart from each other. Uryu could feel his fingers tensing, threatening to crush the mug and send the tea cascading over the table. He couldn't shake Blue Hair's smile. And he hated the way everyone was avoiding the most important fact.

"Is he dangerous?" he asked finally. "Kurosaki?"

"You're not thinking of putting a stake through his heart and cutting off his head are you?" said Chad.

Ah, so Chad really had guessed his thoughts earlier in the night when Uryu had considered shooting Ichigo in the head.

"No, but we need to protect others, don't we? Unless you want Kurosaki to do to someone what was done to him earlier."

Orihime gasped. "Kurosaki-kun wouldn't…"

"He's a vampire. We don't know what he's capable of."

"Indeed, we must be cautious," said Urahara. "But vampires are not bloodthirsty, uncontrollable monsters. Of course, there are dangerous ones, like those two tonight, but I think it likely that they only reacted so viciously against us because we interfered with their adoption of Kurosaki-san. That woman spoke at great length about children. She was desperate to extend their family, which is no doubt why they launched an attack. But vampires do not regularly go on a rampage – indeed, it's almost unheard of. They also do not consume souls. Soul Society knows they exist, but pays little attention because they are not a threat."

"So the occasional bite and rape isn't important to Shinigami? How typical," said Uryu.

"Why should it be? Living humans attack and rape far more often than vampires, and are far more merciless about it. With vampires, the partner is often quite willing to be bitten and any sexual act will be consensual."

That silver smile. Uryu suddenly had a death grip on his mug. "Kurosaki wasn't willing."

"The situation could be much worse, Ishida-san. Kurosaki-san is alive."

The same speech Urahara had given when they'd arrived back at the shop. The same babble designed to soothe feelings. Uryu didn't give a damn about any of that. Everyone was alive. Rejoice. But this wasn't a wound that Orihime could simply whisk away. Tonight would have consequences for Ichigo that none of them could imagine, let alone deal with.

"Indeed," Urahara continued, "Kurosaki-san will live much longer than the rest of you since vampires can live more than double the lifespan of an ordinary human."

"And he will want a partner? And perhaps children?" said Orihime.

Did she sound hopeful as Urahara nodded?

Of course she did. Uryu knew she read vampire manga. She kept trying to get Ichigo to read them too. Ichigo and vampires for her would be a dream.

Though a confusing dream judging by the strained look on her face. Ever since the events in Hueco Mundo there were occasional shadows to her expression that Uryu didn't like to see. She never seemed to be at peace for long. Now she had a fantasy right before her eyes and no doubt a horrible sense of guilt for thinking that way.

The poor girl. Uryu could read her like a book and it was incredible and infuriating that Ichigo couldn't. Sometimes Ichigo didn't even seem to notice she was there at all when she was smiling around him. Him being a vampire may be the only time that Orihime could get him to look at her even once the way she desperately wanted him to.

"What do we do about all of this?" said Uryu.

Urahara shrugged. "We wait for Soul Society."

"We can't-"

"What do you suggest, Ishida-san? The situation is from dire. Kurosaki-san is not the kind to attack someone."

"If vampires are rare then exactly how much is really known about them? You said that couple tonight seemed desperate. What if Kurosaki gets desperate?" Uryu was on his feet, even though he hadn't even realised he'd stood. "You can't let him-"

"Are you an avid reader of vampire manga, Ishida-san? You seem very preoccupied with some of the more violent stereotypes of vampirism."

"No! And this really isn't the time to be teasing someone!"

"Of course, we should watch him closely. And perhaps, until we have had time to gauge the situation, someone like Inoue-san should keep her distance. We wouldn't want to cause any emotional misunderstandings. Vampires looking for a partner often approach someone they know. Inoue-san, as a close female friend, could be targeted."

Urahara has phrased it delicately. Orihime's longing was no secret to anyone and the situation could become painful for her. Uryu was certain the affection was one-sided, but if Ichigo do suddenly view her differently in his current state, the situation could easily spiral out of control. After all, what would happen to Ichigo's feelings once he was cured?

Uryu glanced at Orihime. There was a painful expression on her face. Of course she didn't want to keep away. And of course she hated herself for thinking selfishly like that.

She pressed her hands against her knees. "Oh. But…"

That shadow appeared on her face, accompanied by an uncomfortable look in her eyes. "But if… if the worse did happen and Kurosaki-kun became desperate and attacked someone. If it was me, at least it means no one else would get hur-"

"Inoue-san." Uryu sat beside her quickly. "Don't say something like that." _Please God don't. _"You are just as important as anybody else. We don't want Kurosaki to hurt you, even if it means no one else getting hurt."

Orihime had been hurt enough in recent years. Uryu wasn't sure how much more she could take.

_If you tempt her, Kurosaki, I will kill you._

"Inoue, you should stay away from him," Chad affirmed. "It's messy enough dealing with one vampire and I think we should keep it that way. Ishida and I can keep watch and make sure he doesn't hurt anyone. And if Soul Society don't have a cure, then I'm sure they can develop one soon with all of the technology they have."

"With any luck, we are concerning ourselves with nothing," said Urahara. "However, it would be useful to know how vampires choose their family. How did the fight begin tonight? Did it seem as if they had been watching Kurosaki-san for a while?"

"We weren't there," said Chad. "I sensed tension rising in the office district so I ran as fast as I could. I bumped into Inoue on the way."

She nodded. "I sensed that Kurosaki-kun and Ishida-kun were in danger. Um, I'd been concentrating on them for a while because I felt they were out fighting Hollows."

Everyone was suddenly staring at Uryu. He never liked it when anyone looked at him so intently. He stared at the mug of tea in his hands. "Does it matter?" he asked.

"Anything we learn about vampires could be useful," said Urahara.

"Maybe they like strong people?" said Orihime.

"Did they say anything when they attacked, Ishida-san?"

_There had been several Hollows that night. Uryu had been intending to leave it all to Ichigo until he'd received that text message at one in the morning._

_**I know you can sense what's happening. Get your lazy archer ass out of bed and give me a hand. This one has tentacles! **_

_**Oh, so you need me?**_

**Like hell. **

_**Then I'm going back to sleep. Goodnight! **_

_**Tentacles! Tentacles!**_

_And then Uryu had sensed the appearance of another Hollow a few miles from Kurosaki's location. He'd groaned. There had been a lot of Hollows recently. Uryu couldn't remember the last time he'd had a night of unbroken sleep. He had an exam in class at the end of the week. He needed his sleep…_

_But he couldn't let a Hollow rampage. Ichigo was perfectly capable of dealing with tentacles by himself but he couldn't be in two places at once. Sitting up, Uryu pushed his hair behind his ears and reached for his glasses. He stood and grabbed the white suit hanging by the window before thumbing a text message back to Ichigo. _

_**Beg for help.**_

_**I don't need to. Already sense you've got out of bed, loser.**_

_**You sense me when I'm in bed?**_

_**You wish.**_

_**This has just gotten very weird. Enjoy your tentacles. And if you lose an arm while texting me during a fight it's your own fault for being an idiot. **_

_**Isn't it you who should be careful about losing arms?**_

_Uryu had dealt with the Hollow. And then he'd started towards Kurosaki's location so that he could shoot him._

_And then a voice had called out to him across the quiet, moon-splintered street._

"_Ishida Uryu, how would you like to be our son?"_

They'd known his name, so perhaps they had been watching him the last few nights, Maybe they'd even been responsible for all of the Hollows recently as they attempted to lure him out. Uryu kept his breathing level in front of the others but he could feel his chest tightening as the memories took hold. Ichigo pressed against the ground with his hakama torn away. And then those icy eyes gliding over Uryu, wanting to hold him down too.

Uryu could have outrun them. There had been no need for Kurosaki to sweep in. And then Inoue-san and Sado-kun. And finally Urahara.

"Kurosaki-san wasn't the target was he?" said Urahara softly.

Orihime gasped. "Ishida-kun, you-"

"I don't know anything that would be helpful," said Uryu. "They didn't say much."

"But one thing we now know is that don't necessarily fix on one target," said Urahara.

"No, I don't think that's the case. The target may just multiply."

Blue Hair had practically spelt it out. _"Of course, if I do happen to catch you then I wouldn't say no to having two sons…"_

Uryu had always been prone to nightmares. Disturbed dreams of blood, Hollows and the walking dead as a child, and then Twelfth Division's scientific experiments and dismembered limbs and organs from the Espada battles as a teenager.

And now an entirely new source of nightmares involving none of the above, and yet somehow being even worse.

A warm hand pressed against his. Uryu froze as he felt Orihime leaning close. The red streaks from her earlier tears still stained her skin and dark, puffy shadows had built up beneath her wide eyes. She still had a look about her that made Uryu think she might shatter at any second and yet her eyes were only full of sympathy for him. "Ishida-kun, you don't blame yourself do you? It's not your fault. Really it's not."

She was unbearable.

Uryu pulled his hand away from hers as he pushed his glasses up his nose. He sipped his tea. "This has gone cold. I think we need a fresh pot." Standing, he picked up the warm teapot.

He knew they were watching as he moved into the hallway, sliding the door behind him. He heard Chad's quiet voice. "Inoue, leave him be. He doesn't care for pity."

Because pity was unnecessary. It wasn't his fault. Events had happened as they did. Kurosaki shouldn't have barged in like a bulldozer. Why didn't he ever just watch for a moment before acting? Stupid, reckless, infuriating…

Uryu placed the teapot down onto the kitchen worksurface in an overly delicate manner. At home he would have slammed it since there would be no one else to hear (or care) if he broke another mug or teapot. That wasn't for the others to know about though.

Leaning against the counter with his eyes closed, he massaged his temples. God, his head hurt. And he was tired. And he doubted if the coming days would bring any truly restful sleep.

"And it's almost October…" he murmured. It would be the first of October on Sunday.

He hated this week. Every year something happened, whether it be Hollows or simply the re-emergence of raw pain from that memory ten years ago of Sensei desperately trying not to scream as the Hollows tore through his flesh. Ten years ago on Sunday.

Quietly Uryu moved back through the hallway to the front of the shop. It was never locked, despite Uryu telling Urahara on numerous occasions how ridiculous that was. Though when you were a Shinigami living with a seven-foot giant and two slightly odd children with abilities of their own, thieves were probably not a concern.

It was cold enough outside to bring up goose pimples on Uryu's arms. He needed to find time to make another cape, but it was difficult to make anything now that he had so much studying as a senior. He'd settled for a simple white suit after his last tunic and cape had been ripped beyond repair by a Menos in March. He rather liked the simplicity of the clothing and, although he didn't like to admit it, it was more practical to have something that couldn't be caught on claws or tails. At the same time though, he'd definitely need something thicker as winter settled in. Low blood pressure made him prone to the cold, though it was strange how such a deep chill had set in this far from the traditional winter months. He watched his breath clouding the frozen air.

"Ishida, are you all right?"

Mist hovered thickly in front of Uryu's face, betraying his surprise. "Kurosaki!" He spun around quickly. Ichigo was standing right next to him, only a foot or so away and it was disorientating because Uryu sensed _nothing._

Ichigo held his hands up. "No need to go to red alert."

Uryu felt his eyes dart to the darkened front of the Urahara shop. No sign of movement from inside. Just him, Ichigo and the frozen moonlight.

"Tessai was supposed to be watching you. You shouldn't be up yet."

Ichigo shrugged. "He was asleep by the door and I felt like I needed some air."

Uryu frowned. That didn't sound like Tessai. Warily he watched as Ichigo yawned and stretched his arms. He seemed tired and the weary lines had etched that familiar grumpy expression into his face. Well, he definitely didn't look any different to normal, and he didn't sound any different either as he gave an apish grunt while seeming to rub a creak out of his neck.

"I don't remember much about what happened, but I'm alive so that's a good start," said Ichigo.

"What do you remember?"

"Something hit my legs. I guess I fell. Is everyone else OK?"

Uryu paused, trying not to stare. "They're in the lounge with Urahara-san. Why don't you join them?"

"I will in a moment."

Did he remember the attack at all? Surely he would be... aching in certain places? Although perhaps not since Orihime had healed him. There was nothing about him to suggest he was vampire; no elongated teeth (not that Uryu wanted to get that close to Ichigo's mouth to double check) or vampire gleam in his eyes (whatever that might look like). He was definitely Ichigo.

But equally, he had no detectable reiatsu. Uryu could sense everyone, even people at school who didn't have reiatsu. Having this blank slate in front of him only seemed to make the night even colder, particularly as Ichigo wasn't supposed to be a blank slate. His reaitsu was an endlessly erupting firework; he probably had no idea how many headaches he'd given Uryu in their early days at high school. Strangely, it hadn't taken long for Uryu to accommodate himself with the constant sensation creeping over his skin. In a weird way it was warming to someone like him who was nearly always cold. And a comforting reminder that he wasn't the only one who had to see the world of the dead anymore.

"You look kinda weird," said Ichigo suddenly. "And you're staring. Worried about me?"

Uryu sighed heavily as he looked away and pushed his hair behind his ears. "I couldn't care less about you."

"I saw you sneak out through a window before. Why are you out here? I know you don't like the cold."

"I thought I sensed a Hollow."

" 'Thought' ? What, your senses aren't as sharp as they normally are?"

Uryu opened his mouth and then closed it quickly as he felt a yawn taking shape. Quickly raised his hand to conceal the betrayal of weariness, rearranging his glasses as he did and shooting a glare at Ichigo.

"A look, but no snarky reply?" said Ichigo. "Not like you. What's up?"

God he was as relentless as ever.

"Nothing, I'm fine."

"Why do you never give anything away? It's OK, you know. You can talk to me after everything we've been through. Sheesh, just admit you're tired and that you have a throbbing headache. Go to bed for a few hours. We all know you kinda get more tired than the rest of us."

"I'm fine." And he _didn't _get more tired than the others. Yes, he always seemed to have a sniffle or cough budding somewhere in his lungs, but lots of people were like that.

Ichigo snorted, as if he could read his thoughts. He had an annoying habit of doing that (though most of his habits were annoying, to be honest) and Uryu abruptly remembered that he had vowed to shoot him for that earlier comment about his arm. He supposed he should let him off tonight. He could always shoot him tomorrow.

"I'm going to tell the others I'm going home," said Uryu.

"Want me to come with to tuck you in and tell you a story?"

"No thank you, Kurosaki."

Ichigo laughed as he followed Uryu back inside the shop. Uryu slid the door behind them, but his hand lingered on the wooden frame. He concentrated so hard that his skin tingled. With the moonlight shut away, he was blind. But he shouldn't be blind. He could sense the others in the lounge, but Ichigo… Nothing.

"I feel a bit strange," said Ichigo in the darkness. "You and Rukia have always ranted that I can't seal my reiatsu, but you can't feel it now, can you? I feel like I've just learned something new. It's kinda cool that I can hide it from you and the others now. I was stood outside for a while and you never noticed. Must be weird for you, huh? Like I'm invisible or something. I'll have fun scaring the hell out of you when we get back to school."

Uryu felt his breath slipped past his lips. "I can sense you perfectly fine."

"We'll see."

As Uryu moved to open the door to the lounge, somebody beat him to it. He paused, his hand still half way towards the handle. Urahara, Chad and Orihime were on their feet with urgent looks set into their faces. Tessai was with them. Evidently Ichigo's disappearance had been discovered.

"Yo," said Ichigo. "Sorry I slipped out. You weren't worried, were you?"

"Kurosaki-san!" Urahara smiled broadly. And even after everything he'd emphasised about vampires not being dangerous, Uryu still noted the tone to his voice. "I'm surprised to see you awake so quickly... I thought that sedative would last longer," he added in a mumble that only Uryu seemed to hear.

"Kurosaki-kun!" Orihime gasped.

Tessai had quietly moved until he was standing behind Ichigo. He made an urgent gesture with his arm, silently asking Urahara whether he should smack Ichigo about the head. Urahara mimed for him to stay put. Ichigo frowned as he stared round at Tessai.

"Tea?" said Tessa. "Good tea is a good aid to recovery."

"Do you really like tea, Kurosaki-kun?" said Orihime. "Not blo-"

"Inoue-san, there are some sweets in the kitchen," said Urahara. "The top right cupboard. Why don't you bring them in while Tessai makes the tea?"

"It's fine," said Ichigo. "I need to head home. Dad's away at some doctor conference in Osaka tonight. Karin and Yuzu will be worried."

"Ichigo, do you remember what happened?" asked Chad. "How do you feel?"

"I'm fine. Just kinda tired. You guys? Is everyone OK?" He glanced around and that seemed to be good enough confirmation. He grinned. "Good. What happened to those two weirdoes?

"We defeated them. They won't be back."

"You guys can tell me about it on the way home. Urahara-san, I'm OK to go home, aren't I?"

"Actually, I think it is for the best if you stay here."

Ichigo rolled his eyes. "I feel fine, really. If you're worried though, Ishida or Chad can stay over. There's plenty of room after all."

Urahara paused. "If you insist, I think we have an acceptable compromise."

Ah, so Uryu and Chad were being lumbered with vampire duties then? Well, that was for the best. Uryu would prefer to keep an eye on Ichigo personally anyway.

Nobody spoke as they retrieved their shoes. Uryu kept watch on Ichigo from the corner of his eye. Still that same, tired grumpy expression. The only really awkward thing was the tense silence and fumbling as everyone tried to think of a dozen things while avoiding everyone else's eyes as they tied their shoelaces with tired hands.

Just as everyone left through the front of the shop and said goodnight, Urahara grabbed Uryu's arm. "You understand, don't you?" he murmured quietly.

Uryu nodded. It was possible that Ichigo didn't remember being bitten (thank god). And with the exception of noting a few changes to his senses, he was probably not aware that he'd become a vampire. With any luck, Soul Society would be able to do something useful for once and provide an antidote before Ichigo began to suspect anything.

So in the meantime they just needed to keep a close eye on him.

"Keep Inoue-san away," Urahara added. "I don't think he'd hurt her, but…"

"Of course. I understand."

* * *

The four teenagers were quiet as they walked. Uryu gritted his teeth as he tried not to shiver. Autumn had brought an unnatural early chill with it that was foreboding of an extended winter. Frost glimmered from the rooftops and there was a shine to the pavement that kept making Orihime slip in her pink trainers. Ichigo grabbed her arm once or twice. Uryu watched his fingers carefully, but he never seemed to cling onto her for longer than necessary.

As they reached the crossroads, Uryu glanced at Orihime. She lived close to Ichigo so usually he'd be the one to walk her home since Chad and Uryu lived in the opposite direction.

"Ishida, why don't you walk Inoue home?" said Chad. "Ichigo might as well go straight to bed."

"I can walk her. It's no problem," said Ichigo with a shrug.

"No, it's fine. I won't go to bed anyway now," said Uryu. "Well, see you later." He raised his hand in farewell.

Ichigo sighed heavily. "You guys are lousy liars. Especially Ishida."

"Eh? Me?"

"And now you're panicking. Your voice is funny when you get excited, Uryu."

Uryu frowned. It wasn't the first time Ichigo had used his first name and he should know the consequences by now since the last book Uryu had thrown had hit hard enough to send Ichigo home from school and to the hospital.

"It kinda sounds squeaky," Ichigo added.

_That does it._

Uryu pulled Ginrei Kojaku into his hand. "I was going to shoot you tomorrow, but I've decided to bring my plans forward."

"Hey! Wait a sec!" Ichigo held his hands up.

"We're not on first name terms!"

"Ishida, it's really not a big deal," said Chad.

Yes, it was a big deal. Because it just _was. _And-

Ichigo was standing in front of him. Right in front of him. He grabbed Uryu's right arm, pushing the bow out to the side.

Uryu's eyes widened. He hadn't seen anything. He hadn't sensed anything. And he hadn't had time to react.

Ichigo smiled. "Hey, this could be more fun than I thought. Speed boost."

Uryu moved to grab a seele Schneider from his belt, but Ichigo suddenly had hold of his left arm too. His hands were ridiculously sized compared with Uryu's slender arms. Ichigo squeezed. Not enough to hurt, but enough for Uryu to know that he couldn't escape. They stared at one another, azure eyes drilling into autumnal brown. Ichigo grinned.

"Want me to kick you in the balls?" said Uryu. "Let. Go."

"Annoyed that I moved faster than you? It's just a game, Ishida."

Uryu kicked his leg up, but Ichigo really had developed a new kind of speed. Jumping away before Uryu's foot could connect with anything sensitive, Ichigo held his hands up. "I'm just winding you up and I'm kinda curious. Being able to move like this is awesome."

"Kurosaki-kun?" Orihime said tentatively. "Um, you're acting a little strange."

"Inoue-san, get back," said Uryu. Drawing a seele schneider from his belt, he spun the silver bar around with his fingers as he gathered reishi into the blade. Ichigo was like this all the time, but that speed…

Chad seemed to have the same thought. His arms were tense, ready for the Fullbring to take effect. "Ichigo, have you really become a…?"

Ichigo rolled his eyes. "It's not such a big deal so don't make a fuss. Yeah, I suppose I am a vampire. I felt a bit odd when I woke up and it was easy to slip past Tessai-san. And then I overheard everything you guys were talking about. That's why I called you all lousy liars. Trying to pretend everything is fine when you're walking on eggshells. You know that kind of crap pisses me off. Just be honest and tell me the truth in future."

Silence. The wind scattered browning leaves across the frosted pavement. Uryu tightened his hold on seele schneider, but Ichigo didn't show any turning into a Shinigami. He even seemed to be shivering a little as he shoved his hands deeply into the pockets of his jeans.

"We should take you back to Urahara-san's," Chad said finally.

"Urahara-san said it's not life threatening so it doesn't really bother me. And I really am worried about Karin and Yuzu. Plus, I don't wanna be cooped up there. Sure, I have some weird abilities, but I'm still me."

Still nobody moved. Uryu felt Orihime's eyes flittering nervously between all of them. Moonlight reflected from Chad's left arm. He couldn't seem to decide whether to let his power take effect or not and his skin was caught uncertainly in the midst of the Fullbring transformation.

Ichigo took a step forward as he clenched his fist. "Are you guys really going to fight me? Some friends you turned out to be! For god's sake, I'm me!"

Typical Ichigo, letting emotions cloud his judgement. Of course they had to be cautious, regardless of how that made Ichigo feel. Uryu, having been able to see Hollows for longer than any of them, had not survived all of these years by pandering to someone's emotions. And he wasn't about to start now either, even though seeing that expression on Ichigo's face reminded him of the incident with Ginjo. Ichigo on his hands and knees in the rain with Uryu staring with such a unusual feeling in his chest that he wasn't accustomed to.

"Kurosaki, we're worried about you," said Uryu.

"No. You're worried about what I might do. Do you really think I'd do something like that to anybody? Thanks a lot. And thank you all _so much_ for your support. I was the one who was pinned down beneath that bastard. And I'll tell you now that it hurt."

"Kurosaki-kun!" Orihime gasped. "You remember?"

"It's not exactly an easy thing to forget, but it doesn't matter. It hurt and I'd break that guy's teeth if he came near me again, but..." Ichigo shrugged. "It's weird, but I don't care."

"You don't _care?"_ Uryu stared. It felt as if seele schneider might snap in his hand.

"Ishida, you're squeaking. I just said didn't I? It doesn't matter. But I am tired so I'm going to bed. Screw you all." Shoving his hands into his pockets again, he started to walk.

"Kurosaki-kun!"

"Inoue," Chad grabbed her arm and shook his head. "Ishida, lower that thing. I'll follow him to make sure he doesn't do anything."

Uryu hesitated for a moment, still preferring caution, but slowly he slotted seele schneider back into his belt. Ichigo's shoulders were hunched. He wasn't walking fast but with those long strides he was already at the end of the street.

"Will his sisters be OK?" Uryu murmured.

"I heard that!" Ichigo snapped as he turned. "Ishida, you sick bastard! They're my sisters!

"Ichigo!" Chad roared. "It's been a long night for everyone. I'm sorry. We're sorry," he added, glaring at Uryu. "We don't know anything about vampires and it's a little… unnerving. It may take us a while to get used to it, so just bear with us. Ishida is just worried about you. He worries about you more than any of us. You know that."

Uryu opened his mouth, but Chad gave him another look.

"Thanks, Chad," Ichigo muttered. "And seriously, if you're all that worried you can stay over and keep an eye on me. I'd rather you know that I'm not threat than have you all bitch behind my back."

"Would you be offended if we took you up on that, Ichigo?" said Chad. "We're sorry if you feel that we're intruding, but you'd be worried if it was one of us who'd been bitten, wouldn't you?"

"Yeah. I would. But I wouldn't-"

"You're a vampire!" said Uryu. "We don't know what you're really capable of anymore!"

"You're squeaking _again,_ Ishida."

"I am not sq-"

"Ishida, take Inoue home," said Chad. "Then you go home too. It has been a really, _really_ long night. And it'll be even longer if you and Ichigo don't stop bickering."

"I'm going straight to bed so there won't be any bickering. Ishida, you can stay if you want." Ichigo looked thoughtful for a second and then rubbed his hands together in a feigned thoughtful epiphany. "Oh, I'm sure I have a school shirt that needs patching up."

_I'm going to shoot you. When this is over, I am definitely going to shoot you._

A deep breath. A second deep breath. Even from here he could feel the glint in Ichigo's eyes as he waited for Uryu to react.

"Inoue-san, let's go. Sado-kun, Kurosaki, goodnight."

"Um… um…" Orihime's eyes darted madly between everyone, lingering on Ichigo. That shadowy expression that Uryu hated was on her face again. Sadly she stared at the ground. "Goodnight. I'll see you at school tomorrow."

Uryu slowed his wide paces to let her catch up. She sniffed hard as she wiped her face on the sleeve of her yellow coat. The bags beneath her eyes had deepened.

"You must be tired," Uryu mumbled.

She didn't reply. Uryu wanted to say sorry, though he wasn't really sure what for. Not that it mattered since the words wouldn't come out anyway.

This really had been the longest night of his life.

* * *

**Bit of a build up at the moment. You won't have to wait long for it to get more interesting. Is Uryu OK? he's trickier than I thought he would be to write but he's kinda fun too.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Wow… thank you so much for your support everyone. *hugs* So now the pressure is on to keep writing this in a way that you all like…**

**Eeep!**

* * *

"Ishida. I-shi-da!"

Uryu wasn't a heavy sleeper and he woke as soon as the hushed voice spoke his name. He frowned. That reiatsu. How the hell had she gotten into his apartment? And why hadn't he sensed her the moment she entered? Not like him at all, though perhaps he shouldn't be surprised by the lapse in his abilities judging by how heavy his head felt. Good god, everything hurt.

"Ishida!" the voice was more urgent.

Uryu groaned, but at least her wake up call seemed gentle enough. He blinked. The room was still dark though so he couldn't have been asleep for very long. Probably explained why he felt half dead.

Rukia suddenly kicked him in the ribs. "Oi, Ishida, wake up!"

Uryu instinctively curled his body up on the futon. Ow. Not gentle at all. He moaned as he grabbed his side. "Kuchiki-san, what was that for? I heard you the first time."

"Then get up."

"I am getting up. Just give me a minute."

Uryu was not on friendly terms with mornings. Particularly cold mornings when he could feel the damp chill of his apartment seeping through the fraying bedcovers. _Definitely not right for this time of year. _Awkwardly he felt across the tatami flooring for his glasses with arms that his sleeping brain couldn't seem to coordinate yet.

The darkened room came into focus. Rukia's shape stood beside the futon, hands on hips and her sandaled foot tapping against the floor. It was too dark to see the expression on her face, but Uryu had a feeling she was staring at him with the disapproving frown she normally reserved for Ichigo.

"You Shinigami are so impatient," he muttered, pushing his hair behind his ears and rubbing his eyes.

Today would be full of painkillers. He recognised this headache; the type that latched onto the side of his head where it would set up a cosy home for the next twenty-four hours at least. And no doubt energy drinks from the store would be required too unless he wanted to fall asleep in class.

_And I need to keep an eye on Kurosaki._

Why was this happening to him? This week of all weeks…

He heard Rukia moving across the room and then there was the click of a switch. Uryu groaned as light bled through his still half-asleep eyes. Grabbing the bedcovers, he pulled them over his throbbing head. "What do you want?"

Rukia gasped. "Is this really where you live? It's so cute! You have little frilly curtains! And dresses? Lots of dresses! And frills and pleats and ribbons! Ah…" Uryu could feel her sly look even without seeing it, just as he'd felt that disapproving frown a moment before. "Ishida, these dresses…"

"I sell them! How do you think I afford to eat?"

"And cute little knitted bunnies on the bookcase! _Bunnies!_ And strawberry-patterned aprons!"

"I sell them too. And the rabbits. If you want one, they're five hundred yen each. Aprons are two thousand."

"Ah, there's mould on the walls, Ishida. You need to sell some more dresses so you can afford a better place."

Beneath the darkness of the bedcovers, Uryu massaged his temple. "How do you even know where I live?"

"Soul Society knows where you live."

Uryu peeped his head out of the comforting gloom, squinting in the artificial light. "Why am I not surprised?"

"You're a Quincy. Of course we monitor you. Don't take it personally. It's just surveillance. Not as if we're planning to assassinate you. Yet." Her eyes sparkled as she leaned forward. Uryu could feel her begging for him to react.

"Oh that's nice," he muttered. _Just try it, Shinigami._ He'd considered setting traps for them about the building before. Maybe it was time to give that some serious thought. He wasn't naive (or trustful) enough to believe they'd continue to overlook him for the rest of his life.

Sitting up, he rearranged the bedcovers carefully, making sure that Rukia couldn't see his pyjamas (because it would feel weird for any girl to see him in his pyjamas). It was awkward enough that she was standing next to his bed. "Now why are you here?"

Rukia looked deflated by his response. "You're so calm it's boring. Do you have tea? You're supposed to make tea for guests."

"Shinigami don't class as guests. Consider yourself lucky that I haven't shot you."

"What kind of attitude is that?"

"You're here about Kurosaki aren't you?"

Rukia sat heavily on the edge of the futon as she folded her arms. Uryu clasped the covers tightly. A girl. On his bed. Did she have no shame at all? He cleared his throat as he looked to the side of Rukia.

"I've just spoken with Ichigo and Sado," she said. "And… What's wrong with you? You're not as pale as normal."

"Eh?"

"Ah, are you blushing? Ooooo?" She leaned close. "Amazing. I've never seen you blush before, though it's not very noticeable. You look so unhappy and serious all the time that I didn't know you had emotions like this." She grinned, bringing her face close to his. "Boys really are funny when they first wake up in the morning."

_I don't even know you that well. Why are you teasing me?_

And if he said anything it would only encourage her. He leaned his head into his hand. "You've just spoken with Ichigo and Sado-kun and…?" he prompted.

Rukia sat back on the tatami. "And before that I spoke with Urahara. Soul Society doesn't usually intervene with vampires, but since it's Ichigo and a request from Urahara, I've been sent as a liaison."

"I thought you were a Lieutenant now?" _So isn't this stuff a bit menial for you?_ Probably better not to say that last part aloud.

"Yes." Rukia grinned as she turned her arm to show off her lieutenant's badge, even though Uryu had seen it before. "And also… I know everything about vampires! I've read every book ever written on vampires! To think Ichigo has become one of those lonesome, mysterious-"

"I'm sure you and Inoue-san will have lovely conversations. I always knew you and Kurosaki-"

Rukia drove her elbow through the bedcovers, right into Uryu's stomach. He groaned as he curled up protectively.

"There's nothing between Ichigo and I! Never has been! What are you suggesting? I'm dead for a start! But there's nothing wrong with just appreciating that fact that he's become a vampire. And I like vampires! That's it!"

Uryu buried himself beneath the covers, pulling them over his head once again. "Go and drool somewhere else. Just go away unless you have anything useful to say."

And why was she even here? They weren't exactly friends. He could probably count the number of conversations they'd had on one hand.

"Twelfth division are working on a cure."

That number was a swear word.

Rukia sighed. "Ishida, Ichigo's really annoyed with you. Do you really see him as a threat?"

When he didn't answer, he felt Rukia grab the bedcovers. Uryu clung to them quickly before she could drag them away. "I'm in my pyjamas!"

"I've seen Ichigo's plenty of times. I'm sure yours are no worse." Rukia pulled. Uryu wrapped his legs around them and pulled back. No. Absolutely _not._

"Urgh!" Rukia let go of the covers and settled for stamping her foot instead. "You're so stubborn! He's your friend! He needs your support and he's offended by the way you treated him last night."

"He's a vampire. And he's going to find a partner, right? He could end up raping someone. And he seems to have some new abilities too. Excuse me for being a little concerned."

"Raping someone? You really think of him like that?"

"Vampires don't make any sense! You and Urahara keep saying they're nothing to worry about, but look at what happened last night. Why did that man do that to Kurosaki? They wanted him as a son. Why would they-"

"Because they're vampires. It's just how they work and that kind of sexual act is necessary. It's not just the biting that turns someone into a vampire. Besides, Ichigo isn't that bothered, is he? That tells you how vampires think of all this. And he's not like them. He won't rape anyone. If he wants a partner then may he'll approach a nice girl. She likes him, they have some fun together for a while and then Soul Society finds the cure. La la la, everyone is happy and everything goes back to the way it was."

"What if that someone was you? And what if he didn't bother with consent because he was that desperate for a partner?"

"I'd hit him. Hard. Though I would get to be a vampire…"

Uryu felt like curling up beneath the covers and never coming out. _He'll approach a nice girl. She likes him, they have some fun together for a while…_ How the _hell_ could she say something like that?

He pulled the covers over his head again. "You Shinigami really are despicable. What about Kurosaki? And what about how he feels when this is over and he is cured? I don't think he'll appreciate it if we let him go out of control."

"Then don't let him go out of control. Ishida, it's simple. Keep an eye on him. Support him. And be a friend to him as well."

"I don't think any of you are taking this seriously."

"I think you have a rosy tint to your glasses. Compared with what we've all dealt with before, this is easy."

It's saying something when you classify vampires as 'easy'. Though it wasn't the vampire part that was the issue.

_Silver lips smiling. Ichigo screaming. Hips thrusting. Hands that shouldn't be there caressing bare skin that was nothing to do with them._

How did they deal with this? Or how did Uryu deal with it since everyone else seemed to be dancing around the issue.

_And why didn't Kurosaki care?_

Uryu pushed his glasses up his nose. "Kurosaki and I are enemies. I'm not supposed to be a friend to him."

"Are you always this grumpy in the mornings? I always thought you'd be a rise and shine and be doing your ironing and sewing with the sunrise kind of guy."

He wasn't even going to dignify that with a response.

"You're worried about him, aren't you? It'll work out, Ishida."

"I'm not worried."

_Liar._

Rukia's footsteps moved across the floor. "By the way, I'm going to be staying in the world of the living until this is over. Everything is peaceful in Soul Society so they can spare me. I'll stay with Inoue. I'm going to be coming to school too. I'll transfer into Ichigo's class so I can keep an eye on him."

"Whatever you think is best." Uryu glanced at his cell phone beside the futon. Five fifty. No time for more sleep before school. It would be a miracle if he survived the day.

Rukia jumped up onto the windowsill and then paused. "Ah, I almost forgot. Inoue says there is something called a 'Winter Ball' coming up at school."

Yes. And as President of the Student Council he had to organise the blasted thing. A place for teenage couples to be happy and cuddly. As if he wanted (or deserved) to be any part of such fluffiness.

Well, maybe it would be a little nice… but such a loved-up occasion wasn't a place for someone who didn't even know what happiness was, let alone love.

_Probably doesn't even exist._

He shook his head as he turned his thoughts back to Rukia. "So?" he asked.

"So…" Rukia turned, her eyes shimmering at him. "Make this for me?" She was suddenly holding a magazine in her hands (god only knows where she'd been hiding it). There was a smiling girl in a glittering pink ball gown.

"The dress?"

"But not pink! Purple! And I want this bit white! Pretty please?"

"You're asking about a dress now?"

Rukia stared, her eyes still shining.

"All right," he said. Because it was something he would like making. "But I don't have a lot of time. And you'll need to pay for all the fabric. And I charge commission. And don't you dare try to pay me with any fake Soul Society money. Seventy percent to start and thirty when I finish."

"How about I pay with my body?"

_?!_

Rukia burst out laughing as she jumped out of the window. "Bye bye!"

Uryu rolled onto his side as he rubbed his face with his hands. It had been a long night. And this probably classed as the weirdest morning ever.

"It's going to be a long day," he muttered.

* * *

It was a long day. Uryu had gone to bed at twelve and been woken up at one by Ichigo's text. Back to bed at four thirty. Woken up by Rukia at five thirty five.

_I hate Shinigami._

And equations that he couldn't work out in class. Equations were supposed to be easy because Uryu could understand logic perfectly. He always read ahead too so that by the time they covered something in class he'd already studied it a month ago at home. He should know everything the teacher was explaining right now.

"This will be on the test on Friday so make sure you know it."

_I want to die._

Uryu needed to do well in this test. He had to do well in all of them. Years of Ryuken's stern eyes had drilled that fear into his skull. Besides that, this was his last year of school. He had to pass everything.

And nights like last night were interfering. It wasn't that his grades had dropped. A top grade was a top grade but Uryu didn't like how close he was to the boundary on certain occasions. He blamed Hollows. And lazy Shinigami who couldn't be bothered to arrive in time to battle them.

_Just like with Sensei._

"Hey, Ishida…"

The school yard was quiet during lunch hour; the air too chilling for most students to venture outside. Normally Uryu avoided the cold since it made his fingers ache but the corridors and classrooms were crowded and stifling, and doing no favours for his headache. The fresh bite of the air wasn't exactly soothing, but at least he felt more awake out here.

"What is it, Kurosaki?" Uryu stared at the open maths book in his lap. It had been open on the same page for twenty minutes, but he hadn't been reading, preferring instead to simply listen to the rustling leaves of the browning tree above him. It was his favourite spot, though sadly it was the favourite spot of a lot of students so it wasn't often he got to actually sit her.

Ichigo made a weary noise. It was Monday. Ichigo had sports clubs meetings almost every lunchtime since he contracted his brute strength out to whichever club was desperate enough to pay for it to win an inter-school tournament. So irresponsible. And so immature. Uryu had chastised him at the start of the year, though he couldn't really condemn the actions because it was a brilliant way of making money. He was surprised Ichigo had even thought of it.

"Don't you have club? What is it you're doing now? Baseball?"

"They're in debt. I'll start again when they cough up." Ichigo was holding an orange juice pack in his hands. Chewing on the straw, he leaned back against the tree, slowly allowing himself to slide to the ground beside Uryu. "I feel kinda weird," he mumbled.

Uryu could tell. Ichigo had a set number of facial expressions. Today's was thoughtful grumpiness tinged with a slight hint of melancholy, which basically meant that Ichigo was thinking a lot about something that bothered him. And whenever that happened he'd usually appear beside Uryu, plonking himself down beside Uryu in the library and start reading.

"_Why are you here?"_

"_Just felt like reading. And I'm sitting here because I felt like it."_

Often Uryu would forget he was there at all, only realising afterwards that he hadn't heard Ichigo turn a single page of his book. It wasn't a problem. If something was important, they'd talk. If it wasn't, they'd sit in quiet company.

"_What do you think of me now I have my powers back? Are you glad?"_

"_What kind of question is that? Of course I'm glad. I know what it's like to feel helpless, remember?"_

"_But I'm a Shinigami again."_

"_Substitute. It's different."_

Being a vampire was probably important enough to justify a conversation. Only it seemed as if Ichigo didn't know what to say. And Uryu certainly didn't either.

At mid-morning break earlier, Uryu had watched from a classroom window as Ichigo sat with Chad, talking about something he couldn't hear. Ichigo looked as he always had, apart from his hidden reiatsu and the colour of his spirit ribbon; a darker red than it had been before. He acted the same as before too.

So why did Uryu feel like he was waiting for something to happen?

And every now and then he thought back to last night's moonlit conversation. Kurosaki had been Kurosaki, and yet…

He'd been oddly talkative. Uryu hadn't really noticed it at the time. Uryu and Ichigo didn't talk much, especially about nothing. Last night, more words had been exchanged in a few minutes than normally would in the course of a week.

"Does it still not bother you?" Uryu heard himself ask. "What he did?"

Ichigo shrugged. "It's weird isn't it?"

Uryu looked down unseeing at his book. _Silver smile… _His fingers were tightening against the hardback cover and the throb in his head was deepening. He pressed his fingers to his forehead. It wasn't something he'd normally do in front of most people, but he seemed to let slip sometimes during these quiet conversations with Ichigo.

"I went by Urahara-san's this morning," said Ichigo. "He's given me some vampire books to read. I can't stand vampires and the plots are far too mushy and clichéd."

"They'll find a cure." Soul Society was far in Ichigo's debt. And they depended on him. From their own selfish point of view, they would want him back to normal so that no vampire habits interfered with his Shinigami duties.

Though grudgingly Uryu supposed that Rukia might be right. They had dealt with worse. That said, there was a distant tone to Ichigo's voice. It reminded Uryu of the months during which Ichigo had lost his powers. Constant thoughts about difficult times.

"What's it like?" said Uryu quietly.

"Well, I can live like this if there is no cure, providing I'm not going to crumble in the sunlight. I can see things differently. Colours look a little brighter. And things feel different. I don't know how to explain it. It's not bad." He paused, his fingers fidgeting with the straw and juice pack. "I'm sorry about last night. I did feel a bit strange and I think I scared you."

"I wasn't scared. I doubt you'll be interested in biting me after all."

"Hmmm." Something that sounded like a laugh or a grunt.

"Though that speed was a little unbelievable. How does it work? Reishi?"

"You know I can't explain things like that. Sorry, Ishida. I'll try and pay more attention next time."

Quiet. Uryu vaguely wondered what it was like for a moment. Different colours and feelings? Urahara had said something about vampires being very emotional. Uryu supposed it was pretty obvious from the way Blue Hair had jumped to his death. Proof of the burden that emotions could bring.

In that case, maybe it was better to have as few emotions as possible.

Ichigo stared at his juice packet. "Ishida… Who do you prefer: Rukia or Inoue?"

Uryu froze. Just as he was starting to feel like his old self, everything drained away. _Please_ _don't do this Kurosaki. Don't look at them._

"I'm just curious about who you like," Ichigo said quickly. "I'm not going to attack them. I'm just… curious."

Uryu took a quiet deep breath. He moved his hand back from his face and delicately closed the maths book. "Kuchiki-san is a Shinigami. Inoue-san is a friend. That is all."

"You look out for Inoue a lot. I've kinda wondered about you two before…"

_EH?!_

Uryu's mouth had dropped. He could feel it. And nothing would come out. Not even a splutter.

Ichigo laughed as he scratched the back of his neck. "Ah, forget I asked. It was a weird question." Staring hard at his juice pack, Ichigo's smile faded into something more strained, an almost awkward expression that Uryu wasn't sure how to read, which was odd because Ichigo usually broadcast his emotions and thoughts like a television signal. But the one thing Uryu didn't miss was the flush to his cheeks.

"Kurosaki, if you go near Inoue-san I'll rip your arms off. And Sado-kun will no doubt rip your legs off."

Ichigo looked up quickly. "What's with that attitude!"

"You have never asked about Inoue-san before." He'd never even thrown a second glance in her direction, no matter how short her skirts became. Not that Uryu took a second look either (of course), but he'd just noticed that Ichigo didn't. "And the only reason I think you're suddenly thinking about her in a different way is because you're a vampire. Stay away, Kurosaki. When this is cleared up and you're back to normal, you can ask her out or do anything with my blessing."

"What about Rukia?"

"She'd rip your arms off if you went near her. And then her brother would rip your head off."

Again Ichigo laughed. He crumpled the juice pack in his hand and then was quiet for a moment. "I'm being weird aren't I?"

"Yes."

"I don't know why I asked. I'm not going to hit on them. Trust me on that."

He sounded sincere, but then…

Why was there something about his eyes that Uryu couldn't understand?

Uryu opened his book again, positioning it so that he could look at the page as a pretense whilst still having a clear view of Ichigo's face. "For your own safety, I advise you not to."

"Would you really rip my arms off?"

"Yes. And I'll warn you that it hurts more than you can imagine."

"Some talk. I'd mop the floor with you in a fight."

The book closed again. Oh? "And why do you think that?"

"I'm stronger than you. We both know that."

"A Menos is also physically stronger than me, but I've exterminated many of them. Brute strength doesn't matter if you're an idiot."

"Eh?"

"You're an idiot! A lug! You may have the strength to rival an orang-utan, but you always lumber in without thinking! I'm amazed that you're still alive. And one day you really will get yourself killed. Why is there no common sense in your head? Before taking on any enemy, you have to analyse their attack patterns and then you can implement an effective strategy." Uryu took a deep breath. He was on his feet? When had that happened?

And more importantly, when were his painkillers going to kick in because his head was really, really hurting now.

_Kurosaki, barging in is the reason that man was able to…_

Ichigo blinked. "Um… what does all this have to do with a fight between you and me?"

Uryu folded his arms. Don't shout. Kurosaki wasn't worth shouting about. It was annoying that he'd made Uryu shout in the first place. He never shouted. So why was Ichigo capable of bringing that out in him? Thank god there was no one here but the two of them to see it.

"Do you really think you could win against me, Kurosaki? I know all of your attacks. And I can predict how you'll react to everything I do."

Ichigo snorted. "I know your attacks too."

Uryu reached behind him beneath his school uniform. He swung a seele schneider from his belt. He always had them with him. A habit from the two years Ichigo had been without his power, leaving the hollows to Uryu and Urahara. He waved the silver tube in front of Ichigo's face. "What's this?"

"It's a sword thing. And you can plant them in a circle to blow things up. Renji told me."

"You've never seen me use that technique. And you know nothing about my 'sword thing'. You're unprepared. Monstrous strength isn't everything."

"Well, you never talk about attacks! How am I supposed to know?"

"Correct, Kurosaki. I don't broadcast everything about me to you because we are enemies. I could easily set a trap for you and I'd beat you. So stay away from Inoue-san. In fact, stay away from everyone while you're a vampire. I won't just cut your arms off either."

Ichigo folded his arms. "You're not as clever or as perceptive as you think. How the hell did this conversation even start? You know I was teasing you, right Ishida? You still seem to think I'm going to bite you all."

_The problem, Kurosaki, is that Inoue-san would fall at your feet if you even smiled at her because your smile has that effect. She would give her consent to you for anything. And when this is over, would you still care about her? You could destroy her._

And he didn't realise that because he was an _idiot!_

And this going round and round in pointless circles to form a pointless conversation was not something Uryu was interested in doing on any day, particularly after one hour and five minutes' worth of sleep.

"Are you looking for a partner?" he asked bluntly.

Ichigo rolled his eyes. "Here we go again. I wasn't asking because I was interested in Inoue or Rukia. I was interested in what _you_ thought about them. Though of course you don't believe me. I wish I'd never asked at all. I was just trying to make conversation."

"You're weird."

A wintry breeze rustled the branches above, dislocating brown leaves around the two teenagers. Uryu shivered a little. Too cold outside. Too stuffy inside. Pushing his hair out of his face, he sat and looked up at the leaves above. Autumn was a beautiful season. A shame it had to be so cold. And full of bad memories.

_Autumn leaves stained with blood. Screams from someone trying not to scream that would echo in Uryu's ears relentlessly for weeks._

_And white-faced anger from Ryuken like Uryu had never seen before._

_"Why didn't you run away you stupid child? You could have been killed!"_

"Ishida, you never smile."

Uryu snapped his thoughts back to the school yard at the sound of Ichigo's voice. He turned his head slightly, so that he wouldn't have to meet those brown eyes. So dumb most of the time and so penetrating at others. "Yes I do."

"Not often. Having a girlfriend would do you the world of good. And you must know that half the girls in school have been eyeing you ever since you became president of the student council."

"E-eh?"

"You seriously haven't noticed?"

Uryu stared at Ichigo's small smile and then shook his head blankly. He wasn't sure what to say. _Why would they be after me?_ It was confusing to say the least. He shook his head again. "Just because I don't grin like a moron doesn't mean I'm not happy."

Another scattered breeze that made the dry leaves dance. Autumnal quiet and unspoken words that Uryu knew Ichigo wanted to say.

_Liar._

_And what exactly do you think you can do about it, Kurosaki?_

Standing, Uryu tucked the maths book under his arm. Smiling was an easy enough expression to perform and it didn't matter if he didn't necessarily feel happy when he did it. He smiled when he was content and that was satisfying enough.

"Where are you going?" Ichigo asked.

"Library. By the way, Kurosaki, what I said still stands. I will cut you to pieces if you go near Inoue-san."

As he walked away, he didn't hear Ichigo's soft voice behind him. "Inoue? Ishida, you really don't get any of this do you? For someone so smart you're ridiculously dumb."

* * *

**Chapter four is drafted but needs some work. It's pretty long so may take me a week at least. But I promise it will be worth waiting for and will have some more interesting action in it. **

**And maybe some biting...**


	4. Chapter 4

**OK, so it took longer than a week but this is TWENTY THREE PAGES PEOPLE and just short of 10,000 words! So I hope you're sitting comfortably. And I really hope you like this... this was the hardest part to write so far and I hope it came out Ok and was worth the wait because I know you were all waiting for this part (especially Nocturnal-Niccy616). Thank you to everyone who has reviewed. Too many to mention. I should start replying to you all.**

**And I don't advise any of you to read this if your parents are in the room with you, or if you're at work or in any public place. I think I'll be earning my M rating about now.**

**Hee... hee... hee...**

* * *

The ground was slowly crystallising as frost took hold of the night. Uryu shivered as he tightened the white scarf around his neck. Leaning back against the wall of the apartment block, he tilted the maths textbook so that the page caught more of the moonlight. Angles and equations. And none of it made sense. Even though everything mathematical made sense to Ishida Uryu because logic was simple; a right or wrong answer that didn't depend on you having to analyse and dissect your own angry pessimism in order to match it to what teachers and examiners wanted to hear. Simplicity was soothing for a complex mind.

Uryu threw the book at the ground. "Fuck it," he muttered.

And fuck all the foul mouthed kids at school for being contagious because he _never_ swore.

Fucking vampires. Fucking Shinigami for not doing anything about them. And fucking equations for pissing him off at a time like this.

And more than any of that, fucking Kurosaki for getting himself into another fine mess.

"And why is it always me who seems to have to clear it all up?" he muttered. Why didn't anyone else seem to care?

"_Sado-kun, how was Kurosaki last night?"_

"_He didn't sleep much. I could hear him pacing about, but I guess that's to be expected. He seems normal."_

"_Are you staying again tonight?"_

"_I don't think there's any need."_

"_Kuchiki-san, do you think he's acting different?"_

"_No. He's as grumpy as always."_

"_Inoue-san?"_

"_I keep watching him but I can't even see any fangs."_

Uryu hadn't seen any fangs either. But something was different about Ichigo. He was too quiet at times and too talkative at others. And his eyes were too complicated. Ichigo wasn't complicated like Uryu. He didn't need to have eyes like that.

Uryu rubbed his head with his gloved fingers. He wasn't thinking straight. He shouldn't be out here, guarding Orihime's apartment just in case. He should have gone to Ichigo's house and talked it out with him some more. Maybe then he would be able to figure out what was wrong. He glanced at his watch. Ten past two in the morning. He'd visited Ichigo more than once at this sort of time because of a Hollow occurrence, but it usually involved being sworn at.

_Tomorrow. I'll talk to him tomorrow._

He yawned, but then froze as he sensed the approaching reiatsu. He knew she could conceal it better than this, but there was no point in trying to hide. He supposed he shouldn't be surprised that she'd sensed him since he'd been loitering for some time (though he was disappointed because a Quincy's reiatsu control was _always_ perfect and certainly better than that of a Shinigami).

He retrieved the maths book from the ground and opened it up at a random page, pushing his hair behind his ear as he did. He didn't look up as he heard the opening door, or the padding footsteps as Rukia rounded the corner of the building. Uryu had positioned himself at the side of the apartment, knowing that it would hide him from Inoue's window whilst still affording him a view of anyone walking up to the front door.

"I know what you're thinking," said Rukia. "Shabby control of my reiatsu, correct? You sensed me because I let you sense me. Normally you could probably detect me no matter what, but right now you wouldn't even notice a Menos if it appeared behind you. And your own reiatsu control is a off tonight by a mile so I doubt you'll be able to use your bow. Go home, Ishida."

_My control is _not_ off. _

And even if it was (since he hadn't slept properly in days), it certainly wasn't off by a mile thank you very much.

"I'm fine. I couldn't sleep."

"Liar. You haven't even tried because you've been here since seven. _Seven._ Nothing is going to happen. I was with Ichigo in class all day and I tried all sorts of questions to trick him up. He's acting fine."

Uryu was sick of these conversations. He focused his eyes on the equations. The simplicity of logic that could take him away from everything else. _When x is equal to-_

"Ishida, put the book down."

"Why?"

"Put it down or I'll kick you. I don't have any free hands to take it off you."

Uryu looked at her for the first time. She was frowning at him with a stern expression that promised to kick him hard if he didn't do as she said. In one hand she held a mug that was steaming in the cold air, while in the other she clasped something small and pink. She held the mug out. The smell of green tea lightly pushed through the ice scented air.

"You didn't have to bring me anything. It's my choice to be here." Uryu placed the book quickly on the ground by his feet as he noticed the look on Rukia's face deepening and her slippered foot twitching. He held his hands out to take the tea. "But thank you."

The heat of the mug soaked through his gloves, warming numb skin. Uryu held it just below his face, letting the steam drift over his chin. At times he'd thought she was similar to Ichigo, but Ichigo was someone he could normally understand (until he'd been bitten anyway) where as Rukia always managed to baffle him with her actions. Whether by kicking him or just being nice. He never knew what she was going to do. And she seemed capable of doing anything.

"If being out here makes you feel better then I won't stop you," said Rukia. "And I won't tell Inoue either. But Ishida, it's really cold and you look like hell. When was the last time you slept?"

"I stay up late all the time."

It was the only way to keep up in class when he cut school so often to fight Hollows. Besides that, even though he wasn't on friendly terms with mornings, he didn't find going to sleep at night easy. Feelings that he kept hidden during the day always flooded to his head when he lay down at night. What if someone took Inoue-san away again? What if Sado-kun fell in with some more weird friends? And what would happen next year when school ended and everyone went their separate ways?

_Well, I was alone to begin with so it shouldn't matter._

_..._

"You're strange, you know," Rukia murmured.

"Why? I have to stay up late sometimes because of Hol-"

"I don't mean that in a bad way. You're rude, stubborn and a fool, and you put on these airs of hating everyone and yet you're the biggest worrier. I know you're worried about Ichigo. And Inoue. You're weirdly sweet, even though I couldn't really stand you when I first met you. I haven't forgotten that you came with Ichigo to rescue me."

"Kuchiki-san, it had nothing to do with you. I went to fight Shinigami."

"You went because of Ichigo."

"No."

"I still can't stand that about you. You just don't admit anything about yourself. Why don't you think it's all right to admit that you care about your friends?" Rukia moved close to him. Too close. And because Uryu was against the wall he couldn't escape.

He quickly tilted his head to the side as he swallowed. "You could have put your coat on before you came out. "She was in purple Chappy-patterned pyjamas. He'd noticed them before but he'd tried not to look. The top _two_ buttons were undone. And when she stood this close he could see that there was _skin _showing.

"Eh? What's wrong with my pyjamas? They're cute! And I have matching slippers!" She wiggled her foot as she brought it up off the ground to show off the fluffy bunny heads.

"But... but..."

"It's only you. I really don't care if you see my pyjamas. And since it's only me it shouldn't bother you either. Heh, it's funny to see you react like this though. You were embarrassed this morning too. Is it just me? Or do you just have a phobia of females?"

"Don't tease me." It wasn't a phobia. It just wasn't right for a girl in her pyjamas to be _this_ close. And she shouldn't be enjoying herself about it either.

"All right. You win. Here." Rukia held out the pink thing that she'd been holding in her left hand. A cupcake. It had pink icing and glittery dust that twinkled in the moonlight. "Inoue and I made cupcakes. Out of a recipe book. There's nothing weird in there."

He was hungry. But was that glittery stuff edible? It looked like someone had scribbled on it with on of those gluey glittery pens that all the girls at school had in their pencil cases. "I'm fine so-"

Rukia stamped on his foot. It shouldn't have hurt in the fluffy slippers but it _did _hurt. Uryu winced as he slid along the wall quickly to put three safe metres between them. "Why are you so violent?"

"Be grateful! I could have left you standing out here with nothing!" Rukia followed him and then shoved the cupcake into his hands. "And I even bought you a hot drink, even though _you_ wouldn't make _me_ anything this morning."

"You broke into my apartment. Why should I have made you anything? I told you, you should be grateful I didn't shoot-"

Rukia raised her fist.

"I'm sorry!" Uryu found himself saying. There really should be no need to be concerned with someone who barely came up to his shoulder. How did Ichigo find these weird people?

He looked at the cake. It smelled a little fruity. And actually a little nice. "Thank you," he mumbled.

"Maybe I should move into your cupboard. You could do with someone to teach you a few things. Even getting you to accept a cupcake is like trying to get blood out of a stone. You must be hungry stood out here. Admit you want something for a change and grab it!"

He wanted to tell her she was weird, but he couldn't decide what her reaction might be (and more importantly if it would be violent). Instead he sipped the cooling tea, keeping his eyes on the mug to avoid Rukia's gaze. She watching him and he suddenly realised exactly how much like Ichigo she really was. they both had eyes that had a knack for seeing through you in a way you didn't want them to.

"No need for both of us to be out here, Kuchiki-san. I'll be fine."

Rukia sighed, but finally those eyes were away from him. "Fine. Do as you please. Leave the mug out here when you're done and I'll collect it in the morning." She turned her back on him. As soon as she did, Uryu noticed her shiver and he suddenly realised that she must have been trying very, very hard to look unbothered by the cold whilst facing him.

_You see, Kuchiki-san, nobody likes to give away their weaknesses._

"Goodnight, Ishida. I'll see you at school."

Uryu stared at the cupcake for a moment. "Kuchiki-san, why are you acting like this?" The unexpected words came out quietly. He almost hoped she didn't hear him but was still oddly relieved when she answered.

"Like what?"

He paused as he stared hard at the cupcake. "Like nothing's wrong with Kurosaki. Do you really think this is as simple as finding a girl and having some fun?"

"It'll do him some good. He needed a kick like this to get him to pay attention to life. You're just as bad."

Uryu looked up. She was facing him again, her arms folded and her face stern. "What do you mean?" he asked.

"At least Inoue goes out and has fun shopping and eating cakes. And Sado is in a band with some guys and he goes out every other night with friends. But you and Ichigo… urgh! Life is short when you're alive and all you two do is chase Hollows. It's about time you acted your age. Go out and have some fun. Get girlfriends! Isn't that what teenagers are supposed to do. (But make sure Ichigo gets a nice understanding girlfriend who will still let me sleep in his cupboard because I like that cupboard.)"

Girlfriends?

?

Uryu had never even thought about it. It seemed a bit weird to think about it while he was still in high school. Or ever for that matter because he was Ishida Uryu and he didn't have the emotions for that kind of thing. And surely things like that just got in the way of everything else in your life anyway.

Plenty of people at school didn't have a girlfriend or boyfriend. Ichigo had plenty of girls lining up to watch him play sports though so it was probably only a matter of time before he picked one. With any luck it would happen at the same time they all left school so Uryu wouldn't have to deal with it. Once people got a girlfriend or a boyfriend, everyone else around them seemed to disappear after all.

He tried to laugh. "I thought you'd be jealous if Kurosaki-"

Rukia's eyes flashed and Uryu found himself stepping back quickly to put some distance between them.

"Ichigo is my friend," she snapped. "Unlike you I admit things like that. He is a very dear friend and I want him to be happy. I worry about the kind of life he's going to lead. And I have to worry about you too, because Ichigo worries about you and he'll never get on and do anything for himself if he's too busy worrying about you."

The tea must have made Uryu even more tired than he had been before. She wasn't making any sense and neither was anything he was thinking because he was back to wondering what life would be life when Orihime was married, and Chad was married, and Ichigo was married.

And he would still be Uryu Ishida at home with his sewing and books. He probably wouldn't even get to make a dress for them since there were special, expensive places that couples went to for those kind of things.

Rukia sighed. "Hey, Ishida… would you be..."

"What?"

Her fists clenched, only for a moment, but the tense movement had still been there and Uryu wasn't sure what it meant. "Never mind. Thank you for worrying about me and Inoue. We'll be fine though. Nii-sama is aware of the situation and he'll be here in a flash if anything happens. Ishida, go home. You're Hollow bait standing here half asleep."

He didn't want to admit that, but he was tired. And the best thing about being this tired was that he'd probably fall asleep the moment he lay down. No need to worry about what thoughts would pop into his head to keep him awake because unconsciousness and exhaustion would overrule them.

But Orihime... he'd failed her several times. Exposing her to Kurotschui Mayuri in Soul Society, being absent when she was abducted by the Arrancar and being idiotic enough to take her to see Ichigo and Ulquiorra's battle. Though at the same time, he dreaded to think what would have happened if he hadn't taken her...

Uryu stared at the moon. Always thinking of others before himself. Well, it seemed like a nice way to live. "I'll stay for a little longer if you don't mind. I want to finish my maths chapter anyway."

"Ah... maybe you're out here because you're in love with Inoue?"

"EH?!"

Rukia smiled. "You're not?"

"No! I just... I'd do the same for Kurosaki. Or Sado-kun."

"Just checking. Though I'm sure now..."

"Sure of what?"

"Nothing. Just my own little perspective on life." There was a peculiar look in her eyes that Uryu couldn't read, though she looked awfully satisfied about something. "Enjoy the cupcake. It's strawberry flavoured."

* * *

_I feel like I'm going to die. _

It was half past six in the morning as Uryu fumbled to unlock the door to his apartment. The key wouldn't turn. Probably iced up again, though he hadn't expected to have to deal with it at this time of year. Autumn wasn't supposed to be this cold. He swore quietly as he manoeuvred the key back and forth with his numb fingers. Swearing was justified at a time like this when he just wanted to go to bed.

There had been no sign of trouble at Orihime's apartment. No Ichigo. No Hollows. Nothing but dry leaves rattling back and forth across the street. And finally the equations had assembled into some sort of sense that would do for Friday's test so Uryu had allowed himself to leave as the first shadows of dawn began to sweep away the morning darkness.

The door opened a last. Kicking off his white shoes, Uryu unzipped his white jacket. Sleep. No, wait. Hot tea. No, chocolate. He needed hot chocolate if he had some left. He'd bought it cheap from the store since it was going out of date. Normally he couldn't afford something like that and he'd strictly rationed it to try and make it last. Tonight felt like a justifiable hot chocolate night. Chocolate. Sleep.

No, wait. Shower. Chocolate. Sleep. Warm water would ease some feeling back into his hands. And he hadn't showered last night so he'd felt a bit… icky all day. As for sleep, he could probably manage an hour before he had to get up. Two and a half if he used hirenkyaku and skipped out first period.

"It's only sports…" he muttered.

He left his belt and seele schneiders by the door with his school bag, ready to grab first thing in the morning. Slipping off his jacket and black t-shirt, he folded them neatly on the chest of drawers beneath the window. Tomorrow he'd start work on that new cape. A jacket alone just couldn't cut it in subzero temperatures and the cold that had soaked into his joints felt as if it would make him ache for days.

Uryu was poor and couldn't afford anything beyond a one-room apartment. Usually the school offered some support to orphans, but Uryu wasn't classed as an orphan since Ryuken was still around. Ryuken had said he could go 'home', but that place wasn't home. And Uryu had decided he'd rather rot in a mouldy apartment than have to hide as that shadow fell over him again.

His apartment wasn't a bad place. The whole block was owned by a friend of the lady who ran the sewing supplies shop, and she'd been nice enough to give him a discount on the rent in return for doing some odd jobs about the building. Couple that with other odd jobs and sewing commissions, (he'd never thought he'd be thankful for cosplayers, though the weirdness of the hobby still utterly baffled him) and he could just about manage to survive. Although heating was definitely outside of his budget.

The apartment was about the size of Ichigo's bedroom. Uryu used the far corner as the sleeping area. There was a small chest of drawers and a futon bed (that was always out because he could never be bothered to drag it out of the cupboard after a night of exterminating Hollows). In the opposite corner, there was a battered cooker and cracked worksurface that served as his kitchen. He was also fortunate enough to have a wetroom, though it was more of a wet cupboard than a room with there being just enough space for the toilet, sink and shower. Yes, it smelt of mould but it had hot water and was better than sharing with the rest of the neighbourhood at the local baths, so that's all that really mattered. There was actually mould all over the apartment since the whole building seemed to be rotting to pieces from rising damp, but he'd managed to hide the worst of the peeling paint with pictures from yard sales and homemade tapestries.

He didn't bother with the lights as he stepped over the futon. Electricity was expensive and the gloom felt easier on his tired eyes. Besides that, he often showered in the dark. He still had the scar that Ryuken had left him with when he'd restored his powers; a black star across the front of Uryu's chest that ached as much as his joints on cold nights. A reminder of what happened when you allowed emotions to get the better of you. And a more infuriating reminder that he could never escape Ryuken completely.

_"Just remember who gave you that power back, Uryu. You'd have been a pathetic meal for a Hollow long ago if I hadn't intervened."_

Uryu grimaced as he pressed his hand against the scar. It was a good job he did have his own wetroom; no doubt none of the public baths would let him in for fear that he was some kind of yakuza with this marking. _Thanks, Ryuken. You've doomed me to high rent forever more._

And no, that would not convince him to go 'home'.

Leaving his glasses on the worksurface in the 'kitchen', he opened the door to the wetroom and reached out to turn on the hot water. Just as his hand clasped the metal tap, a shirted body pressed itself against his bare back. Arms folded about his waist. "Yo, Ishida."

Uryu jumped, eliciting a light chuckle from the one behind him. Uryu thought he must already be asleep. _Kurosaki?_ The name didn't make it out of his lips, even though he felt his mouth open. What was he doing here? And why did Uryu suddenly feel colder than he had outside in the autumn frost? He should be angry. Furious enough to punch Ichigo in the face. But instead of anger there was the beginning of a cold trickle of sweat creeping down his arm.

_Why are Kurosaki's hands…?_

They were pressed against his bare abdomen; tense and with the slightest hint of a tremble that seemed so unlike Ichigo. His breath brushed against Uryu's neck, but he didn't say anything. In the quiet, Uryu heard the light thud of his heart in his chest.

The worst thing anyone can do is act like a rabbit in the headlights when faced with something they don't want to see. Uryu despised people like that.

And yet he couldn't move. He stared at the wetroom wall, invisible in the dark.

"_Vampires have no preference."_

Urahara had said that when he was talking about adopting children.

_What if...?_

No... It couldn't be possible. Choosing a partner was different to a child. Surely vampires had a preference…

_Surely…_

_Please…_

"I'm sorry," Ichigo mumbled, his voice so quiet that Uryu could barely hear it. "I really thought I could handle it, and yet I can barely last a day. I'm really weak."

"What are you talking about?" Uryu found his voice at last, though it sounded nothing like his voice at all. Huskier. As if there wasn't any breath left in his body with Ichigo's tight arms sealed about his waist.

Ichigo sighed, his breath tickling Uryu's neck. Uryu heard the sound of Ichigo opening and closing his mouth several times, as if he was struggling to make anything come out. "This is really awkward," Ichigo mumbled finally. "I have some things I need to explain. They may sound kinda weird, but just listen."

Uryu licked his dry lips. His cross dangled from the bracelet on his wrist. He never removed it, even in the shower, but it would be useless at such close range. Or if he did manage to use it at this distance it would be fatal to Ichigo. Instead, he pressed his hands against Ichigo's, casually trying to push them away. But they wouldn't move. Ichigo's grip tightened until Uryu could feel the fingers bruising his skin.

"Um." Again he licked his lips. "Can I have my shower first? There's tea in the kitchen if you want some. And maybe some hot chocola-"

Ichigo pressed himself more firmly against Uryu's back. "Uryu, this is really important."

_We're not on first name terms._

But the words wouldn't come out. Uryu felt his breath quickening. His heart beating hard enough to make him feel sick. Slowly Ichigo raised one of his hands, brushing his fingers lightly against Uryu's neck.

_No..._

"Um... Ishida… I-"

_Don't._

"Uryu... who do you like? Rukia or Inoue?"

Uryu allowed several breaths to slip through his mouth as he searched for his voice. He swallowed. "Neither."

"Name a girl at school you like."

He wasn't sure how to answer that until he felt Ichigo move his head a little closer, his breath both warming and chilling on the side of Uryu's face. "Then how about a guy…?"

"No! Kurosaki, what is…" He stopped quickly as he heard the sound of his voice. Frantic. And in a grim moment of humour he could suddenly hear the squeak Ichigo had winged about last night. He took a deep breath.

_Don't panic. Panicking is useless. Stay calm._

But…

"Ishida..." Ichigo mumbled, "I think being a vampire has had a really weird effect."

_Calm._

"That's fine." Uryu lightly pressed his hand against Ichigo's, moving it from his tummy. Turning to face him, he smiled. Or tried to smile. "We can fix it. Let's go and see Urahara."

Ichigo pressed his hands against Uryu's shoulders, shoving him against the damp wetroom wall. "No. No, just listen to me. I know this is crazy. I don't get it myself. I never thought I liked… but… then… I saw you. Standing outside Urahara's in the moonlight and…" Ichigo laughed. Or maybe it was a choke. Uryu couldn't tell in the darkness. "I heard everything you all spoke about with Urahara about vampires and partners. I had to cover my mouth so you didn't hear me laughing. I told myself it didn't matter. I didn't care about a partner… and then I…" He swallowed hard as he gripped Uryu's hands, spreading his palms out to entwine their fingers.

_His palms are sweaty. He isn't making sense. _

And yet somehow Uryu understood everything he was saying. And Ichigo's grip was strong enough to hurt. Enough to tell Uryu he wouldn't be able to escape.

"Ishida, I realised that maybe I did need a partner. I tried to think of someone, like Rukia. And then Inoue, but the idea… it didn't feel right," Ichigo babbled, his voice breaking from the mumble into a frantic mishmash with all the words tripping over one another. "It would be like I was forcing myself to like them or something. But I had to force myself. Because it had to be them and not you. Liking a guy is just… But the more I thought about it, the more I realised that I couldn't target anyone else. You'd expect me to hit on the girls. You'd probably set one of your little traps for me. And then you'd hole me up at Urahara's until that antidote was ready. You, you, you… everything came down to you. Even when I was trying not to think about you, you were there with those eyes watching me… blue eyes… and that way you always brush your hair back. You only do it when you're agitated. It's like you do it to stop yourself from fidgeting. And I wondered if you were aware of that. Or if anyone else had noticed. Or if it was just me who always sees it."

Another choking laugh, accompanied by a sweat-dampened, shaking hand that brushed lightly against Uryu's face and then through his dark hair. It was too dark to see his face but Uryu could imagine it perfectly; a strained, almost painful expression, just like the one he'd had that night he'd faced Ginjo in the rain. Teetering on an edge that Uryu had been afraid he wouldn't recover from.

Afraid…

_I was frightened back then. Because you were in so much pain. _

Though he hadn't admitted it. And the fear had been more of a painful twist in his chest as he'd watched Ichigo crying on the ground at Ginjo's feet.

Now, there was no pain. Only cold. The kind of chill he hadn't felt since being a child. Many things had frightened him back them. Hollows with the blood of souls rolling down their chin. Or Ryuken's hand coming towards him. _"I told you not to spend time with your grandfather." _Or of Sensei being pulled apart by Hollows as the autumn leaves danced in the wind.

And eventually he'd seen so much fear that it had almost ceased to exist.

But that was a lie. Many things still frightened him. Or maybe it was just one thing that he'd never really admitted to himself. Fear of losing Ichigo. Of Ichigo losing himself.

Because Sensei was no more. And even though Sensei could never be replaced, somehow Ichigo had succeeded in closing that void a little. As annoying as he was. And as much as Uryu despised him at times (or told himself that because it wasn't like him to admit that someone was actually important to him).

_So please don't do this to me._

"Ishida, do you understand what I'm telling you? I can fight Hollows but telling someone this… I feel like I want to die. And yet if I died now I'd be the most dissatisfied ghost Soul Society had ever known. Ishida… I think I… like… like… you… though I'm not sure why because… you're actually kinda annoying. And you're just… I dunno…"

Spoken so quietly that Uryu almost couldn't make out the words. And how was he supposed to respond? Laugh? Pretend it was a joke? Though how could he when Ichigo sounded as if he was going to fall apart?

He spoke slowly, careful to keep the shake from his voice. _Don't let an enemy see your fear._ Even if that enemy is your best friend. Or as close to a best friend as someone like Uryu would ever. "You need to go to Urahara-san's."

"No, I need to be here with you. Ishida, you're agonising. But as terrible as I feel, I also feel better than I ever have done before. It's like a huge weight has lifted. It's always been you, and I never realised. I feel like I'm seeing clearly for the first time and I have to stay like this. I've always been miserable, Ishida. You understand what that's like, right? Right?"

Breaths deepening. A chilling feeling clamping down on his lungs.

_"What happens when Kurosaki gets desperate?"_

"Let go, Kurosaki."

"I've never looked at girls. I should have realised that was weird. Keigo told me it was weird all the time."

"Let go."

"Is it the same for you? Have you ever looked at a girl in school?"

"Let go, Kurosaki!"

Uryu threw his full weight against Ichigo, but the hands were still clamped about his and Ichigo's strength was beyond human. He grabbed Uryu's arms, twisting them above his head and shoving him backwards against the wetroom wall. His lower body pressed against Uryu so tightly that he couldn't even kick him.

_No…_

And God he could feel something through ichigo's jeans that he didn't want to feel.

_This isn't happening…_

Holding both of Uryu's arms with one hand, Ichigo slid the other about his bare waist. For the tiniest of moments the fingers brushed against the top of Uryu's white trousers.

_No…Please no…_

Ichigo's hand slowly trailed up his abdomen and then wrapped around his chest. "Ishida, you have to listen. Damn it, I've been planning this out all night and I still can't say it right. I didn't want you to freak out, though it is you and do kinda freak out occasionally about nothing. This is nothing to worry about, I promise. You'll understand what this is like if I show you." He moved his face close to Uryu's neck, his breath hazing across the skin. "It won't hurt. A little bite. That's all I promise."

"Kurosaki! Can you even hear yourself? This isn't you!"

Ichigo was invisible in the dark since Uryu's eyes could never adjust to the gloom without lenses, but the breath from Ichigo's lips told him that he'd tilted his head. The sensation was no longer on his neck, but instead falling across his mouth. Moving closer.

_He wouldn't…_

Uryu turned his head quickly to the side, pressing his cheek as close to the damp, mould-scented wall as possible.

_Think… What do I do? What do I say?_

He always had a plan. Even if an enemy was stronger he could usually think of something that would at least slow them down.

_But what the hell do I do when I'm pinned to the wall by someone ten times more powerful than anybody else I've ever faced?_

All he could do was tremble. "Kurosaki…" And how pathetically weak his voice sounded.

"Ishida, out of everyone, you're the one who's always there for me. When I lost my powers, Chad became distant, Inoue acted like nothing was wrong and Rukia was gone. But you… you looked out for me. You'd just kinda arrive at my house, uninvited, because you had some textbook or whatever to give to me, but I knew you were checking up on me. I never said thank you. I could never do anything for you. I'd invite you out when I went to the cinema with Keigo. You never came. You always look so distant, even though you're closer to me then anyone. You're so… unhappy. Just like me."

Somehow Uryu managed to laugh. Even though he wanted to scream. "Unhappy? _You don't even know the meaning of the word!_ You have everything. A family, friends and Inoue-san lo-"

"Anyone can be unhappy. I've been unhappy ever since my mother was killed. And seeing ghosts made me unhappy because there were always so many kids crying and then disappearing, leaving nothing but a bloody puddle on the street where they used to be. Now I understand; they were eaten by Hollows. It's painful to remember. You have painful memories too, don't you? Inoue and Chad only learnt to see these things in the past few years. You and I have seen them for so much longer. But ever since last night, all that pain inside of me has gone. It feels… I don't know how to describe it. I can't remember the last time I was happy like this. And finally I can pay you back for all the support you've given to me. I can take all that pain away that you've been bottling up for years. I know I've had it easy compared to you and you must hate me for being this selfish and feeling sorry for myself. But it's Ok to be selfish sometimes."

Just like Uryu, Ichigo seemed to be trembling, his fingers quivering as he pressed them against Uryu's face. Uryu licked his dry lips. He could never match Ichigo's strength so the only avenue left was reason. And how flimsy that felt when he could sense such desperateness in every syllable Ichigo spoke.

"Kurosaki, I'm not unhappy. I was once." So unhappy that he'd trailed his finger across a razor blade on several occasions, wondering how much it would hurt to run it across his wrists. "But then you and the others changed everything." He stopped to take a deep breath. It wasn't like him to speak so urgently. He wasn't used to explaining things about himself either. In fact, it was something he usually avoided at all costs.

"I'm thankful for everything you've done," he said slowly, "and I'm… grateful that you want to do more for me, but this isn't what I want, Kurosaki. And…"

_You're scaring me._

He intended to say that, hoping it would bring Ichigo back to his senses. Instead, though it was a different set of words that came out of his mouth.

"And you owe me."

"For what?"

"For what you did to me in Las Noches."

A card he'd told himself he would never play, no matter what. And he despised himself for it now. He heard the way Ichigo caught his breath.

"You almost killed me."

He didn't need to say that because Ichigo was fully aware of what he had almost done. he said it anyway. It was nothing short of a miracle Uryu hadn't died as soon as that sword had been rammed through him.

And it was a miracle that Ichigo hadn't died inside afterwards, although for a time it had seemed as if he might.

"_Ishida…"_

_The first day they'd all been back at school together, Ichigo appeared beside Uryu in the library. _

"_Ishida…"_

"_Don't say a word. Don't mention it. It's fine."_

"_But-"_

"_It's fine, Kurosaki."_

It was. Physical injuries could be healed easily by Orihime. A missing arm. A sword thrust. She could heal anything so Uryu would be fine.

For Ichigo, it would never heal. The attack had done more damage to him than it ever would to Uryu. Ichigo's sword may have been in Uryu's chest but something was still impaling Ichigo's even now, and it was Uryu who had control of the blade. He could never remove it, but he had the awful power to twist it deeper.

Ichigo's hand tensed. Uryu couldn't even imagine the expression that would be on his face.

_I'll apologise to you when this is over._

"Kurosaki. Let me go."

Silence.

And then…

"No."

Uryu felt himself freeze. "N-no?"

"No. This is my way of saying sorry. I can't change the past but-"

"'Sorry'? You're letting it happen again! You attacked me because you became a monster and lost control! The same thing is-"

"It's not the same. Ishida, being like this is amazing. I've never felt so happy in my entire life. It'll make you happy too. You want that right? I know I'm acting a little crazy, but trust me. I promise it will be all right." Ichigo lowered his head. His lips brushed against Uryu's neck, the contact quickly turning moist as he opened his mouth.

"Kurosaki! Kurosaki!"

Uryu instinctively tried to shrink away, as if he could disappear through the wall. But suddenly he realised that he didn't need to. Ichigo's grip had loosened slightly. Uryu shoved his arms against his chest, pushing Ichigo back just enough to slip past him. He ran, out of the wetroom and across the apartment.

"Ishida." Ichigo was standing in front of him. How did he move like that? Uryu swung his arm out to form Ginrei Kojaku, intending to use it as a shield while he ran for the window, but Ichigo already had hold of him, twisting his arms and wrapping his foot around Uryu's ankle until he was falling backwards onto the futon with Ichigo on top of him.

_No…_

"Ishida, stop fidgeting. It's fine. Listen, I'm just going to bite you and then you'll see. What that guy did to me was horrible. I won't do it like that. He… pushed himself into me first and then bit me. This way will be better."

Uryu shook his head. His face was suddenly wet. Tears. "Don't… Please don't. Kurosaki…"

Ichigo smiled as he cupped his face, gently wiping the tears away with a finger. "What's with that look, Ishida? I know you always say we're enemies, but after everything we've been through we're friends. We both know that, despite that dumbass high and mighty talk of yours. I'm not going to hurt you. So don't look so worried."

Autumnal morning light was beginning to filter through the window. The seele schneiders… why had he left them by the door?

_Talk to him. Make him stop._

"You're right. We really did become friends. But Kurosaki, don't you think it's weird for us to be in this position? I mean, it's not the thing that two male friends really do, right? Let's go and see Urahara-san. He can make it so that you feel more like your old self." He tried to laugh. "A-and I can't wait to see the look on your face when you remember this later on."

_Please._ Please…

"Hmmm? See Urahara-san? Well, I know I am acting a bit different, but it's like I'm seeing clearly for the first time. We're similar, Ishida, so it makes perfect sense that we should be together. That said, you are the one who's always right – as much as I hate to admit that. Urahara-san… Hmmm… But I have a better idea." He lowered his head, bringing his mouth alongside Uryu's ear. "Why don't you let me illuminate you as to how incredible my new life is? You're nearly always right. This time I promise you that you're wrong. It'll be fine, Ishida. Just relax." Ichigo pressed his mouth against Uryu's neck, gently kissing it and running his tongue over the skin.

"Kurosaki…" Uryu felt as if he was going to choke.

"Ishida, I promise it'll be fine. Just stop fidgeting. You'll enjoy it. I'll be gentle."

"No, don't! Please don't. Kurosaki!_ Kurosaki!"_

Ichigo pressed himself forcefully against Uryu as his kisses became more urgent. Uryu screwed his eyes shut. He pushed against Ichigo as hard as he could, but it didn't matter. This was going to happen and he couldn't stop it. A sound came out of his mouth that sounded almost like a sob. Maybe it was since he had tears streaming down his face. He hadn't cried in years and he couldn't remember what it felt like. Even as a child, tears had been rare because Ryuken…

_Boys don't cry, Uryu. Stop being so noisy._

Uryu didn't feel the teeth sink into his neck, but it must have happened. Ichigo was making a wet sucking noise and Uryu was quickly feeling light headed. He could also smell blood. That horrible stench that still gave him nightmares.

But for the first time it didn't bring that awful feeling with it. And, actually, the feel of Ichigo's lips gently sucking on his neck was… nice. It didn't hurt. Or it did a little, but it didn't really matter because it was… nice. So nice that he could feel the tension in his arms loosening.

_No! Don't think like that or I'll turn into a vampire! There has to be something in his saliva that's doing this. It's wrong. It's-_

He wasn't pushing against Ichigo any more and Ichigo wasn't holding his arms. He didn't need to since they'd fallen limply against the pillow. Uryu tilted his head back. He didn't mean to (or maybe he did?), but somehow it happened and Ichigo moaned at the easier access.

_No…Stop…_

Fear and desperation had passed. And it was almost blissful to feel the chill of them vanish, even as he tried to cling on to them because fear was less terrifying than whatever he was feeling now.

_This is weird. Kurosaki…_

Had a nice smell that Uryu had never noticed before. Fresh, with a tint of sweet fruitiness. The shower gel he used?

_No… Kurosaki on top of me…_

Uryu's arms weren't on the pillow anymore. They were around Ichigo.

_N…o…_

Cold sweat became warm. Tears drying. Breaths quickening. Uryu pressed one hand to Ichigo's head, tousling that ridiculously messy hair and pressing him tighter to his neck, even though he tried not to.

"Ishida…" Ichigo's lips parted from his neck and Uryu felt a sound escape his lips. He was whimpering at the loss of contact?

"Ishida, I didn't hurt you, did I?"

Uryu shook his head numbly.

Uryu couldn't feel happiness. Or at the very least he hadn't felt it in so long that he couldn't remember what it really felt like. People who made him happy had disappeared. Sensei. And even his friends were not set in stone. Orihime had been taken away by the Arrancar. Ichigo had lost his powers. And next year he'd lose everyone when school ended.

What he felt now…

For some strange reason lying in the darkness with Ichigo staring down at him…

He was…

"This is really weird," he murmured.

"Bad weird? Or good weird?"

"Um…"

_Happy._

The morning glimmer outlined the orange and pink blur of Ichigo's face. This was all wrong. Ishida Uryu was calm. And sometimes he was so angry that it was blinding. As for other emotions, they didn't exist. Or at least they weren't supposed to exist. If they had existed they'd died a long time ago.

"Um…" He was trembling. He didn't tremble. And when he had as a child it had been through fear.

There wasn't any fear now. The chill of it that had been there just a few minutes ago was so distant he couldn't even remember it. Instead, his face was hot and uncomfortable, and yet he rather liked the feeling.

"Ishida?" Ichigo murmured. "Look at me." Gently he cupped Uryu's face, tilting it up slightly. He was close enough for Uryu's fragile eyes to be able to focus on him.

_Kurosaki Ichigo… you are not supposed to look like this._

Crimson early light reflecting from beads of sweat on his brow. Brown eyes intent. Mouth slightly apart. The scent of blood, normally so pungent and despising, mingling with Ichigo's breath to turn into something new that Uryu could drink all day.

_Why can't I stop staring at you?_ Uryu had not slept properly in more than a week. The last twenty-four hours had drained him. And the sudden bliss was a sweet contrast to his earlier terror.

He didn't stand a chance against the chemical reaction flooding his blood.

"Nice weird…" he murmured.

Ichigo smiled, his fingers gently stroking Uryu's cheeks. "Really?"

Uryu managed to nod.

Ichigo moved closer. Uryu only had a second to realise what he was going to do. A jolt of nervousness, even though he knew it wouldn't hurt. Ichigo's lips brushing against his for the smallest, softest of moments.

"OK? Not frightened anymore?" said Ichigo.

Uryu shook his head. Ichigo grinned as he pressed his face against Uryu's and then he laughed. A small nervous laugh that Uryu had never heard from him before. And he liked it.

"Do you know how torn I've felt since I was bitten?" Ichigo murmured. "It was so weird to find myself thinking about you. And it scared the hell out of me. But as I lay awake last night, I realised that plenty of guys out there like guys. So maybe it would be OK. Even though it's still kinda weird. I mean it's you after all..."

"I'm not one of those guys who likes guys."

_Am I?_

"Are you sure? Ishida, you're smiling."

Ichigo was smiling too; not his usual goofy smile but a softer expression that Uryu didn't think he'd ever seen before. He couldn't have seen it before because if he had…

_I would have felt this way sooner._

Uryu turned his face to the side. This was weird. His face was warm in a way that he wasn't used to and it was turning warmer under that smile. And it was weird because it was awkward, unbearable and agonising, and yet it still made him grin like an idiot.

"You should your emotions out more, Ishida. I like seeing you happy," Ichigo said softly. He leaned his head to the side, bringing his lips in line with Uryu's. More warmth soaking into Uryu's face, even though he never felt warm. Lips meeting in a light kiss tinged with blood.

Uryu slowly raised his hands, tentatively brushing his fingers against Ichigo's face. It wasn't gross. And it was weird. In fact, he rather liked the slight rough feel to his skin.

Ichigo pressed his hands against Uryu's. "Ishida, listen to me again for a moment. I don't know how, but I kinda understand how this works. If I leave you alone now, you'll be back to normal in a few days, but if you want... I can vampirise you completely." He lowered his hand, brushing his fingers against the waistband of Uryu's trousers. "I know I've forced you to come this far already. It'll be hard if you say no, but I won't push you any further."

Uryu swallowed. He was supposed to say no. He knew he should say no because whatever strange urges he had now were entirely the result of whatever chemical Ichigo had passed on through his teeth or saliva.

But as Rukia had said, where was the real harm? And him being with Ichigo would mean that Orihime and everyone else was safe. This was what he'd wanted.

Although Orihime… she'd cry. And he'd hate that.

But…

Saying no would mean going back to the way he used to be.

And he could hear Rukia's angry voice. _"Admit you want something for a change and grab it!"_

_Forgive me for being selfish just this once… Just once let me have what I want._

"Kurosaki…" Uryu leaned forward. A tentative kiss. And then a second that lingered as Ichigo lightly ran his tongue over Uryu's lips. Strange. And the sudden moistness was a little surprising (kissing with tongues had always sounded like it should be disgusting after all). But the metallic taste of blood was tinged with sweetness and using tongues was how you were supposed to kiss… Uryu pressed his mouth against Ichigo's a third time, parting his lips and returning the favour. Slowly, tentatively, he licked Ichigo's lips apart to deepen the kiss. Not that disgusting at all. Actually…

_I could get used to this._

But he knew he was going to regret this. It wasn't real. Him. And Kurosaki. It was so bizarre it was ridiculous.

Uryu wasn't immune to the feelings of being a teenager. Contrary to what Ichigo had said, there were pretty girls at school. It wasn't often Uryu looked, but it did happen on occasions, though not enough to justify saying he liked any particular girl. And sometimes at home he'd feel awkward urges at unexpected times that he'd gradually learnt to deal with.

But something this intense. And with a boy. It shouldn't be right. But suddenly he realised he might almost be the happiest person in the world as him and Ichigo kissed again and again, getting used to the strange wetness that accompanied each touch of their lips.

But maybe it did make sense. Uryu didn't like talking to people. But there had always been something about those quiet conversations with Ichigo in the library that had made him feel... different to usual. And even when they'd said nothing at all it had still felt comforting to sit there. He'd never thought about it before now.

Although one important point had to be cleared up. Drawing back from the kiss, Uryu pressed his finger against Ichigo's mouth as Ichigo leaned in to follow him. "But Kurosaki, don't call my Uryu. We're not on first name terms."

Ichigo's mouth dropped. "You're joking, right? If this isn't enough for first name terms then what the hell is?"

He had that grumpy angry expression on his face. Uryu had never really taken a good look at it before; the red flushes on his cheeks and the deep lines in his forehead. And the way his brown eyes widened.

Uryu pressed his lips together, trying to hold the smile back and look serious. "Kurosaki Ichigo, do you honestly think I'll let you, a Shinigami, get your way in everything?"

Ichigo kissed his finger. "How about a vampire?"

Uryu pretended to think about it for a moment as he ran his finger across Ichigo's lips. "I might be able to live with that. Maybe." _I can't believe I'm saying that._

"I don't mind if you don't let me get my way all the time. I'm used to you arguing with everything I say anyway. But I'm stronger than you so I'm sure I can manage."

"Shinigami are so arrogant." Uryu grabbed the front of Ichigo's shirt as he tried to roll him over so that he could pin him. But it was like trying to move a block of concrete. Ichigo watched him in amusement until Uryu fell back against the futon. "All right. So you have the most ridiculous brute strength. Like an orang-utan. But I'm still smarter than you."

"But I'm not as dumb as you think. Admit it. Look at how I set this whole thing up. I made you worry about Inoue and Rukia, knowing that you'd probably camp out there all night. That gave me a chance to actually get some sleep before breaking in here, make your bed for you - since you left it a right mess this morning - and it also gave me an advantage over you because you were tired and unsuspecting. Otherwise you might have managed to think your way out of it after all."

Uryu heard himself laugh. "What a clumsy plan. A million variables could have made it go wrong."

"But they didn't and you like how it turned out."

Uryu grabbed Ichigo's shoulders as he tried to roll him over again. Ichigo smiled as he pushed against him. Of course Uryu's efforts were in vain since Ichigo was stronger than him. But he liked the breathless fumbling as they tried to pin one another down in between smiles, chuckles, wet kisses and little bites from Ichigo that made Uryu dizzy. And somehow Uryu's trousers had come undone and Ichigo was slowly, slowly moving his hand across the front of his underwear.

_This is weird…_

Ichigo had him pinned again, his legs either side of Uryu's. He lowered his head, kissing Uryu's chest and then moving lower and lower. He slid his hand beneath the band of Uryu's underwear.

_A boy… This should be gross… And terrifying._

Uryu gently pulled at the buttons of Ichigo's shirt. Tentative hands on bare skin. Muscles that had always been there and yet somehow he'd never noticed them.

_I really like this._

Even though he didn't like a lot of things.

_Why didn't something like this happen sooner between us?_

Uryu had his hands on Ichigo's jeans. He unzipped them slowly. He knew he couldn't hurt him but his hand was still shaking a little in case he did something wrong. Or maybe he was trembling at what they were about to do and the fact that it was something he'd never even considered would happen to him, let alone with a boy. And how weird that he wasn't being boring and sensible like he normally was with everything, and how much he liked being like this. Though there wasn't any rational reason to stop anyway. Sometimes at school he'd hear girls whispering about something that had happened with a boy and they might cry a bit with worry about the potential consequences. And Uryu would think they were a bit silly for getting themselves into that situation in the first places.

With two boys, they weren't really any 'consequences' they had to worry about in that regard.

"Ishida, like I said I don't mind if I don't always get my way, but I wouldn't mind if you turned round for me now. I don't think this will work very well from the front. I won't hurt you, I promise."

It did hurt. It hurt a lot more than Uryu thought it would, but Ichigo kept his word. He was slow, always checking to make sure Uryu was all right, and squeezing his hand and kissing his neck to help relax him. And quickly the pain turned into something else. Uryu was breathing heavily and yet it felt as if he was barely taking in any air at all.

"Ku...ro...saki...!"

They both fell limp against the damp futon. Uryu breathed hard as Ichigo wrapped his arms around him and kissed his cheek. Trembling, he reached his hand behind him, searching for Ichigo's sweaty fingers. He clenched them tightly. "Kurosaki, promise me this won't end."

That happened a lot didn't it? Girls at school crying because they'd been used for one night.

Ichigo rolled onto his side. facing Uryu, he pressed his hand against his face. "We're a couple now. One of those vampire couples that Urahara spoke about. It's no one but you. Huh... that feels so corny so say. You're right, this is weird. Really, really weird. But it's a good weird."

Uryu smiled, but he found himself biting his lip as he clung tightly to Ichigo. "But the others…" Feelings he hadn't even realised he had. And he loved them. Going back to sitting alone in the mould-soaked apartment. Never being held like this because Ishida Uryu wasn't the type of person anyone wanted to hug (and his old self wouldn't know what to do if such a thing did happen). Going back to the state of unhappiness and indifference that he'd foolishly called normality and contentedness…

Ichigo kissed his forehead. "I won't let them cure us. Don't worry, Ishida. No matter what, we'll make sure we stay this way."

* * *

**Oh Uryu darling, you're going to be a wreck by the time I'm through with you and your twisted emotions :D**

**And now for a bit of bad news for my darling readers. Next update will take longer. There's a big expo here at the end of the month and I need to be getting on with cosplay stuff. I'm hoping you'll have chapter five before the end of October, but it's planned to be another very long one so no promises. ****I'll see how all the cosplay work goes. Back to faster updates after that hopefully.**

**And Gemini24 - yes. Maybe even a little glimpse next ch. If not, definitely later.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you all so much for the reviews! I feel so loved :) And thank you for your patience with this update! To make up for it, I have two updates for you today. Firstly, I bequeath to you all some Ichigo. I think it's about time we heard from him.**

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_Congratulations, Kurosaki Ichigo. Once again you lost control._

The sneering voice in Ichigo's head sounded very much like his Hollow. And Ichigo wasn't sure if he was pleased or terrified at hearing it again. He hadn't heard from his Hollow or Zangetsu once since he'd lost his powers, even after he'd regained them. He'd tried not to dwell on that too much. It was amazing that he'd regained his powers at all. He couldn't ask for anymore, even though he wanted more than anything to hear them again. His Hollow was an evil little thing, but it was still a aprt of him and Zabgetsu.

Though he wasn't sure what either of them would say to him now he was a vampire.

_Or has another personality joined them?_ he mused.

He still seemed to have his Shinigami powers (he'd tested that last night), but they'd definitely been supplemented by something else. Shunpo was faster and all that crap Uryu and Rukia had always babbled about regarding reiatsu control was suddenly doable.

The weirdest thing was the way he felt. He'd lost control of his powers before; it terrified him; made him angry enough to punch walls and bruise his knuckles. But this time he was smiling, even though that was the last thing he should be doing.

Uryu had been crying. _Uryu._ The one who never looked fazed by anything, even when Orihime was in tatters or when Chad was balking at whatever it was that was happening around them. Uryu was the one who kept his head and made sure that everyone else did the same, or protected them if they couldn't.

Sure, Ichigo had seen Uryu cry once before so of course he knew Uryu had more emotions than he let on, but it wasn't as if made a habit of letting them slip. And to cry through fear because Ichigo had terrified him that much.

_But it's OK, right? Because this morning you were happy. I've never seen you look like that before._

Ichigo was sitting on a frosted bench in the park in the centre of town. Last night was the first time he'd been to Uryu's apartment. He'd tried to invite himself round before since he'd been curious about where he lived, but Uryu had refused to give him the address. Fortunately, being a vampire helped in that regard. Uryu, usually the person Ichigo had the most difficulty in tracking, had stuck out like a lightbulb amid all the normal folk.

Unfortunately, this part of town was unfamiliar. It had the reputation for being the district you avoided unless you wanted to be mugged for someone looking for drugs money. Ichigo had suspected Uryu lived around here, and that he just didn't want to admit it to any of them. At least he knew now why Uryu had always been pretty good at dealing with any fights in school. You had to be if you could live and survive in this part of town.

Ichigo had been a bit lost after leaving Uryu's apartment and after stumbling into the park he'd realised he'd gone the wrong way completely. He should have been paying more attention (but who wants to concentrate on walking to school when you have the memory of Uryu's hands all over your body to play with in your mind?), but sitting here for a bit in the cold sunlight wasn't a bad thing. In fact, it was probably a good idea to settle his thoughts before heading to school anyway unless he wanted to dither between grinning like an idiot because of what had happened with Uryu and wanting to fall to his knees and scream because of what had happened with Uryu.

_Yeah, might be a bit of a give away to Rukia and the others... _

And what was he supposed to say when they asked him? _Ishida was right as usual. I lost control and turned my friend into a vampire. But he liked it so it's fine. _

No, it wasn't fine. Ichigo had forced him. _I know that I never intended to hurt you or r… you. I just wanted to know what you'd feel like after being bitten. And if you'd feel the same way I did..._

He couldn't feel guilty. Or even worried that he didn't feel guilty because it definitely wasn't in his nature to shrug something like this away. Maybe that was part of the vampire thing. He hadn't cared when that blue-haired guy had pinned him down. At the time it had been violating, demeaning and he'd cried just like Uryu had. But then he'd woken up at Urahara's and realised that, actually, he rather liked this new way of looking at the world.

Ichigo hadn't thought he was a miserable person. Though equally he wasn't someone who slept easily either since there was always something to think about it, whether it be a Hollow that had almost killed one of them or a long-past battle that still bothered him. Ever since being bitten though, those things hadn't seemed important. And for some reason he'd just felt happy. Perhaps it was because he finally didn't have to feel guilty anymore for all of the terrible things that had happened in the past.

And now after this morning it felt as if he'd never be miserable again. Though Uryu was right when he'd said this was all weird. Hell, it was beyond weird. It was ridiculous. Uryu. _Uryu._

When had he started liking guys?

And _Uryu?_

He supposed Uryu did kinda have cool hair. A bit girly but it suited him and it looked cool when he stood there facing a Hollow with the wind blowing his hair out. Ichigo would never be able to pull off a look like that. And Uryu's blue eyes were kinda nice. Blue eyes were rare in Japan. A bit creepy actually, but they were kinda pretty and Ichigo did stare at them sometimes when he was bored-

He froze as he realised his train of thought.

_Oh fuck._

That sneer of a voice inside his head called him an idiot for not seeing this one coming. Ichigo shook his head quickly. "No, no, no… I don't like guys…"

But did he like girls? Of course he did. That actress he could never remember the name of... yeah... her... But at school? Mizuiro had proudly produced a magazine of pretty naked girls draped over various pieces of furniture. It had been a bit gross actually. And as for female class mates... just no. Though Uryu definitely had cool hair.

_Oh fuck…_

Had becoming a vampire just pulled out something in him that had already been-

No. He wasn't going to think like that. He wasn't gay. He _wasn't._ Being with Uryu was different. OK, that seemed like a lame excuse but Ichigo was taking it anyway.

_Vampires are weird..._

That first night after being bitten, Ichigo had known he was acting a bit different. It had been subtle at first. Simply liking the way Uryu looked in the moonlight or enjoying teasing him and holding his arms back. But of course Uryu had been as prickly as ever so he hadn't exactly responded positively.

And it had bothered Ichigo, even though he knew damn well how Uryu would react. And then as he'd tried to sleep he'd found himself replaying events and altering them. Uryu standing outside Urahara's shop in the moonlight. Uryu for once admitting that the night had bothered him and Ichigo placing a hand comfortingly on his shoulder. And then an arm around him. And then tilting Uryu's head back to look at those blue eyes...

It had been weird to suddenly think of Uryu like that. Damn right terrifying. But also exciting because he'd never liked anyone before. And weirdly it hadn't seemed disgusting to find himself liking a boy.

And maybe it wasn't that crazy. None of the others had noticed a change in Ichigo. Chad had asked several times if he was all right, but seemed to put any weirdness down to the fact that it had been a long night. Uryu had noticed though. Did that mean he looked at Ichigo more closely than anybody else? And then Ichigo's fantasies had gone into overdrive because maybe... just maybe... he was onto something. Uryu didn't look at girls. Uryu had flocks of them after him. He didn't even notice. He'd turned down half of the girls on the student council without even realising they were trying to ask him out.

Ichigo glanced at his phone as he heard the beep. He'd received several text messages from Chad, Orihime and Rukia about fifteen minutes, but he wasn't quite sure how to respond. He stared hard at Rukia's latest message.

**You'd better not be flapping about the streets in a big black cape looking for virgins to bite.**

She said it as a joke, but Ichigo knew full well that she would be the first one to come after him.

_Sorry Rukia..._

Again he felt that odd pang inside him. The strange feeling of not hating himself or feeling guilty for losing control and letting everyone down. So very unlike him... but he liked being this way. It seemed easier.

Slowly he thumbed back a response. **Not been sleeping well. Coming in late. **He paused. **Notice I get a text from all you but not from Ishida. Screw him.**

Because now was a crucial moment and Ichigo had to put on a pretense. Ichigo was happy with the way things were, even if he was suddenly besotted with Uryu (still so weird...) and finding that he had a taste for blood (not as disgusting as he'd thought it would be. Actually, he could probably drink Uryu all day). Most importantly, he just liked being this way. Content. Peaceful. Happy. He didn't want to lose that. He could understand why the others wouldn't agree. Being bitten had definitely changed him - and against his will - so it was right to want to reverse that.

But things were just better this way. And he wasn't going to bite anyone so it was fine.

_Though I kinda did bite Uryu..._

He winced. Why did he always lose control? First he'd intended to just talk to Uryu. And then he'd thought about it a bit more and realised that being a vampire might be pretty good for someone like Uryu. Ichigo had been miserable in life and Uryu had certainly had a much harder time than he had. And thinking of hard times, where the hell had Uryu's scar come from?

Ichigo had felt it in the darkness and just assumed it was a normal scar (he had plenty of his own). But as the morning had lightened, he'd realised there was nothing normal about it. A black star that no normal weapon could have produced. And as proud of his Quincy heritage as Uryu was, Ichigo didn't see him as the type to get a tattoo. Besides, it was too rough for anything like that. It was a scar. And Uryu hadn't had it until recently.

Ichigo could clearly remember a sports class at school, just after he'd met Uryu. He remembered seeing Uryu changing. He'd taken notice because Uryu hadn't been as scrawny as he'd looked. Though thinking about it now made him laugh. _My god, I really was watching you without realising, wasn't I?_

So when had it appeared? Thinking about it, Uryu had been a bit weird about changing for sports since... since... when had it started? That idiot Mashino had picked up on it first. _"Hey Uryu, you're always hiding yourself. You got tits under there or something?"_

Uryu had lamped him. And then Ichigo had lamped him twice. Uryu had kicked Ichigo and told him to stay out of it. And then Chad had picked Mashino up off the floor and politely told him not to say that again to anyone.

Uryu had been hiding that scar?

_Why is there so much about you that I don't know?_

And Ichigo had his suspicions about where it had come from. Just before they'd all left for Hueco Mundo, Ichigo had taken Urahara aside.

"_Is Ishida really all right to come? Does he-"_

"_He has his Quincy powers back. Ishida-san has been training with his father. Though I believe the regime has been a little harsh. And a deal was also involved that you should probably be aware of." _

'A little harsh'...

And ever since then Uryu had been hiding himself in the changing rooms at school. _Your father gave you that thing?_

Why did nothing nice ever happen to Uryu? Something had happened to his mother (and Ichigo didn't know what since Uryu refused to talk about it and glared at Ichigo every time he started to ask), his grandfather had met a hideous end in front of Uryu's eyes and his father... didn't seem like much of a father.

_And I'm not a very good friend..._

Ichigo clenched his fist. He'd lost control last night. And even though it was OK because Uryu seemed happy-

_I know you're only happy because of whatever chemicals were released into your blood when I bit you._

But could it change a person this much? When Ichigo had been bitten and violated, he'd kicked and resisted until he passed out (probably from blood loss because that guy had sucked damn hard). But Uryu had reacted differently. He'd relaxed in seconds and he'd definitely enjoyed himself.

But... Ichigo had been violated first and bitten second. It was the bite that released the vampire chemicals or whatever. Ichigo had also relaxed when he'd been bitten. By biting Uryu, he'd pretty much ensured that he'd go along with anything else.

Ichigo stared at the sky. "I have no idea what you really think of me, Ishida."

Or even what Ichigo thought of him. Right now, he loved him. Adored him. Needed him. But that was because he was a vampire. What about before then?

"Is any of this real?"

And would Uryu hate him?

He shrugged. There was to need to think about any of this, even though it was cowardly to ignore it. Ichigo was happy. Uryu was happy. Before all of this, they'd both been miserable. So life was clearly better for them now. Besides that, Uryu had made it quite clear he didn't want to go back to who he'd been. He's been frantic this morning as he clung to Ichigo.

"_Kurosaki, promise me this won't end." _

Ichigo smiled. "So now I have to protect you."

He glanced down as his phone suddenly beeped. Message from Rukia. **I got a text. He's ill. Fool was out last night watching for Hollows. He needs his sleep.**

"Of course you got a text, Rukia." Ichigo had sent all of them a text from Uryu's phone before he left. Hopefully that would throw them off. Though hopefully Uryu wasn't even on their radar at all.

He stretched as he stood, shivering as he pulled his jacket close. He should get a move on before anyone got really suspicious. He'd only miss first period, which was sports. He liked sports, but it wasn't as if he'd miss anything important. Fortunately he'd slept last night while waiting for Uryu to come home so he wasn't completely dead on his feet (unlike Uryu, who definitely wasn't in any state to come to school when he hadn't slept in god only knows how long). Ichigo hadn't wanted to leave him this morning since cuddling beside Uryu was much more pleasant than the monotony of school, but he needed to put on a show.

"Somehow, I don't think the others are going to approve of the fact that I've brainwashed him," Ichigo muttered.

* * *

**Short chapter after such a long wait, but don't worry. Check back later today : ) This chapter was too long so I split it into two.**

**Oh, and Gemini - you ask far too many questions! All have already been considered (some already drafted) and all will be answered in time... (and I think Rukia would still feel the cold, though that can be debated of course)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Second update today. I know everyone wants to see how Rukia & co. react but first I think we need to look at how Ichigo and Uryu are going to react around each other as vampires.**

* * *

Uryu woke up slowly. Things hurt. His neck hurt. His teeth hurt. And somewhere else hurt _a lot_.

_Kurosaki..._

He should be horrified. Kurosaki.

They'd...

He could still feel Kurosaki inside him. Could still taste the blood from their kisses. He should be running for the toilet to vomit. _Kurosaki._

He shouldn't have a grin on his face that could probably rival Ichigo's in terms of being a completely idiotic expression. He rolled onto his side as he pressed his hand to his mouth. A first kiss. And so much more. And even though it should all be wrong he was still grinning.

_Kurosaki... _

Waking up was always uncomfortable for Uryu. The cold of the apartment and the feeling of waking up as Ishida Uryu were always enough to make him wish he'd never woken up at all. Today though, being awake felt better than being asleep and he liked the feeling of actually being happy with the world for once.

_I could get used to this._

So this was what it felt like to be a vampire? He assumed he was a vampire since Ichigo had bitten him. And there was no other explanation for why he was feeling so happy and un-Ishida Uryu-like, or why he'd given into Ichigo in the first place. Being with Ichigo wasn't exactly something that had ever crossed his mind.

There was a small table between Uryu's futon and the window with a mirror, brush and a few other bits and pieces he usually needed in the mornings. Picking up the mirror, he stared. He'd read somewhere that vampires didn't have reflections, but fortunately that seemed incorrect (because not being able to see your reflection would be really annoying). He didn't look any different, apart from several bruises on his neck. He opened his mouth wide. Ah, his canines were much sharper than they should be. Probably explained the toothache.

They were kinda cool actually…

Smiling, he placed the mirror back on the table and fell back against the futon. Now that he was a vampire too, he could feel Ichigo's warm reiatsu again; he was in the kitchen, boiling the kettle on the stove. Strange how Uryu had hated that possessive aura the first time he'd felt it (probably because the power of it had been enough to knock him out, which was a bit embarrassing when you were on your first day in a new school). He wasn't sure when he'd learnt to... adore it? Had he adored it before today? For some reason he thought he might have, even though he would never have admitted, or perhaps even realised it. Ichigo's reiatsu was warm and embracing, perhaps one of the only warm things in Uryu's life, since most other things were cold and discarding.

_You were the first person to notice me at school._

Well, Uryu had forced Ichigo to notice him, but the reaction he'd received had not been the one he'd expected.

_You forced me to be your friend. _

It had been a little easier to get up in the mornings after that.

Uryu rubbed the sleep from his eyes. Apart from the pleasant feeling of the world not being as bad as it used to be, other things were different too. Colours. Everything was brighter. Even the tattered walls of the apartment looked vibrant; beautiful almost, even though his apartment had never been beautiful.

And reishi... Uryu felt as if he was back in Soul Society.

There was a big difference between the world of the living and the worlds of the dead. Reishi was just a small part of the world of the living, but in Soul Society and Hueco Mundo everything was made of spirit particles. If the real world was a congested city to a Quincy, the others were clear mountains where the air was sweet. Uryu had always loved the feeling of being in those worlds; he could breathe easier, move easier and he wasn't so tired all the time. And now he had that same feeling here in his mouldy apartment.

_I could really get used to this._

In fact, he already was used to it. Just the thought of one of his old mornings was enough to tighten his breath enough to almost suffocate him. And for some reason he was remembering Blue Hair jumping off that building in the office district...

Uryu quickly shook his head, focusing hard on Ichigo's reiatsu to make himself smile again.

He reached for his glasses, freezing as his hand touched the frames. Wait. Everything was already in focus. He rubbed his eyes and then put on his glasses. The world blurred enough to make his head throb. Quickly he pulled the frames from his face. Being a vampire had perfected his vision?

"Hey, you finally woke up." Ichigo gingerly sat on the edge of the futon. He was dressed in his grey school trousers and a black and purple jacket. He scraped his hand through his hair as he tried to hold back his grin. "Um… how do you feel?"

"Kurosaki! My glasses!"

"Your glasses? You left them on the worksurface so I moved them here for when you woke up. You-"

"Not that!" Uryu didn't even remember where he'd left them. He put them on, wincing as the blur made his brain ache. "I can't wear them anymore!"

"Eh?"

"I can see without them! What do I do?"

"What do you mean? Just don't wear them."

"But I like my glasses! I cut back on everything for weeks so I could afford a cool pair because I didn't want geeky plastic ones. And I really like these frames."

Ichigo was quiet for a second. "The first thing you talk about after everything is... your glasses?"

"But I like them..."

"Uryu, I'm sure we can get you clear lenses if you really, really still want to wear them, OK?"

"I'm not asking my optician for clear lenses! They'll think I'm a weird cosplayer or something!" Uryu pulled the covers over his head. He hadn't even had the frames that long. Weeks of saving wasted...

"Uryu, are you seriously going to sulk because of your glasses?"

Uryu. But maybe it was nice to hear that name from someone other than Ryuken who always uttered it like it was something unpleasant stuck in the back of his throat. Uryu felt himself smiling in the darkness. Though at the same time, everything was happening far too quickly and he couldn't decide if the name was good or bad. "That's the second time you've called me Uryu. We're not on first name terms, Shinigami."

"Are you still going on about that, Uryu?"

Uryu pushed back the covers as he sat up again. "Don't call me Uryu. This is too weird. And..."

_Why do I want to throw myself at you as your lips say my name?_

And why was the thought of that both terrifying and wonderful?

Ichigo was staring at him with an annoying expression somewhere between trying to be serious and trying not to laugh. Uryu hated that expression. It had always been condescending, telling Uryu he was worrying about nothing when he was worrying about something very important. And yet actually it didn't look that bad today as Ichigo's lips quivered into the start of a slow smile.

Uryu rolled onto his side so that he didn't have to look at him. Even though he wanted to look at him. "I don't know what to do," he muttered.

_And I want my eyesight back._

Ichigo leaned closer. "I made you some hot chocolate."

Uryu tilted his head. He hadn't noticed the mug in Ichigo's hand before, or the rich melted scent that was Uryu's special treat for extra long days when he felt even colder than usual. Maybe today it was justified since it was weirder than usual. And actually hot chocolate might taster better when it wasn't a bad day.

"You were almost out so I bought you some more from the shop," Ichigo added.

Uryu suddenly frowned. "You bought me some more? Why?"

"Why? Don't you like it?"

"If I didn't like it, why would I have it in the first place?"

"Then why are you asking so many questions?"

"Just why would you buy me some more? It's expensive."

"Because I wanted to make some hot chocolate for when you woke up! Why are you stressing about it!"

Uryu hid his face against his pillow. He felt warm. Far warmer than he was used to. Pleasant or unpleasant? He couldn't decide. "It's just weird! No one's ever bought me anything out of the blue before!"

"Then be thankful! You…" Ichigo suddenly laughed. "I can't believe we're arguing... Glasses, chocolate, why do you worry about the weirdest things? And here was me worrying about..." He stopped.

Uryu didn't like the sudden tone to his voice. He lifted his head slightly from the muffled comfort of the pillow. Suddenly the apartment and its colours didn't look as bright as before. Ichigo worrying... Uryu hadn't even considered that possibility because Urahara had said vampires partnered for life. And suddenly thinking about whether that was true or not made his chest tighten. "About what?"

Ichigo scratched his neck, his eyes looking everywhere but at Uryu as red coloured his cheeks. "Nothing. It doesn't matter."

"Yes it does. What?"

"It doesn't matter."

"Yes, it does matter! I know what you're thinking about. You're wishing you'd bitten someone like Kuchiki-san or Inoue-san instead. Maybe you didn't even intend to target me in the first place and it just happened because you lost control and-"

Ichigo put the mug down on the tatami floor and then pressed himself against Uryu. He kissed him, pushing his tongue past Uryu's lips as he cupped his face. "Ishida. Shut up. You've been awake for two minutes and you're stressing about _everything._ Stop it."

"But-"

"You're squeaking, Ishida." Ichigo hugged him. His arms wrapped about Uryu so tightly they hurt, but that was OK because being hugged so viciously was better than being left alone with the breath dying in his throat.

"I don't squeak," Uryu mumbled against Ichigo's chest.

Ichigo stroked Uryu's hair with his fingers. "Ishida, it could never have been anyone but you, as weird as that is. I just thought... you might... hate me."

"Why would I hate you? Even before...this... I didn't hate you. Even though you are a Shinigami. I always made an exception for you."

_And I don't hate you even though you've turned me into a vampire. Actually, I might lo-_

No. He wasn't going to say that word. Even in his head. It was weird enough already.

"Gargh!" Ichigo covered his face with his hands. "I'm no good at explaining any of this stuff so don't make me. I'm really happy we're like this now so don't go winging and stressing about weird stuff."

"But do you-"

"Ishida, your winging, is, as of now, discounted!"

"Discounted? How-"

"Discounted!" Ichigo hugged him hard.

Uryu gasped. "You're suffocating me."

"Oh. Sorry."

Ichigo rolled off of him, instead closely laying beside Uryu and lazily draping an arm over him. Uryu tried not to wince as he felt the budding bruise expanding across his chest. "You're a bit of a brute you know," he said. "And-"

"Discoun-"

"All right! I heard you and your big mouth the first and second time and I get it already!"

At any other time Uryu would start to get a headache about now. And he should be smacking Ichigo about the head for trying to order him around, but Ichigo was warm and his arm felt nice against Uryu's body. And even though it was all stupidly weird maybe Uryu didn't need to think too hard. He smiled. Things had turned out this way and it seemed they were both fine with that.

"Hey Kurosaki, pass me my chocolate."

Ichigo retrieved the mug from the floor, but as he moved to hand it over, Uryu saw his eyes drop to Uryu's bare chest. Oh. Uryu suddenly felt incredibly dense.

He was still naked. He hadn't even thought of that (how could he not have?). And coupled with the embarrassment of his pale, scrawny body, his scar was also in plain sight. Quickly Uryu grabbed the bedcovers and yanked them up to his chin.

"Your father did that to you?" Ichigo murmured.

Uryu nodded slowly, keeping his eyes on the covers and away from Ichigo's face. "When I got my powers back."

"I thought so. Does it hurt?"

Uryu shook his head. Gently Ichigo tucked the covers around him. "You don't need to hide it. Everybody has scars, whether they're on the inside or the outside."

"That sounds wise for you. What manga was that in?"

"No idea. Stop insulting me and drink your chocolate."

The chocolate was still warm. And against all odds Ichigo had made it exactly how Uryu liked (or maybe he liked it just because Ichigo had made it for him). He needed to drink this more often in the mornings. Preferably while leaning against Ichigo listening to the light rattle of the wind chimes by the window, which were actually soothing for once rather than a nuisance. After dragging himself awake, he never had time to sit like this before school.

He blinked.

School.

Uryu gasped as he put the mug down. "What time is it? We need to get ready for school!" He stood, but Ichigo suddenly grabbed his arm, pulling him onto his lap and holding him close. He wrapped a blanket around them. "Ah, school. Ishida, I have some news for you. I've already been to school and come back."

"Eh?"

"It's four thirty?"

"In the morning?"

"Why would it be four in the morning when you only got back here at six am? It's four thirty in the afternoon you dumbass!"

"EH?" Uryu tried to stand, but again Ichigo pulled him back down.

"You were tired. I know you hate taking a day off so I collected work for you when I was there. I told everyone I was ill and I came home an hour early so I could take care of you. And all of this means that you don't have to get out of bed until tomorrow."

"But I like going to school."

"Nobody can stay awake forever. You needed to sleep so I let you sleep."

"You shouldn't-"

"Discounted!"

Another crushing hug that threatened to crack a rib or too. Uryu hissed as the breath was drained from his lungs. "Ku...ro..."

Ichigo released him. "Well, you shouldn't winge."

Uryu picked up his mug again. At least Ichigo had brought his homework home. Missing a day off school had always been frustrating for Uryu since a day alone (and ill to boot) in his miserable apartment wasn't exactly relaxing. But this time, missing school didn't actually bother him that much. He read ahead anyway so he wouldn't fall behind. And maybe staying away from school for a day was a good idea because he could get used to being a vampire and being with Ichigo. He bit his lip as he tried to stop another idiotic grin spreading across his face.

He pressed his back against Ichigo's chest, smiling as Ichigo wrapped an arm around him. Weird that it felt so good. And weird because the thought of this yesterday would have had him running for the hills. And weirder still, he didn't mind that how he was acting now wasn't normal behaviour for Ishida Uryu. Or that the reason he was like this was because Ichigo had pinned him down against his will this morning.

"Kurosaki, what happens now?" Uryu murmured.

"No idea. I suppose we carry on as normal. Urahara didn't mention anything else. And I don't want children so don't get any ideas."

"You're the one who likes children. I can't stand them. And I'm not sharing you."

"Possessive, aren't you?"

"On my pride as a Quincy, I will not have you vampirising anyone else."

Ichigo smiled as he moved to kiss Uryu's cheek, but Uryu turned his head so that their lips met. He felt Ichigo hesitate for a moment before opening his mouth. Wet lips and tongues. And even though they'd kissed a lot this morning, it was still new and exciting and nerve-wracking. But it was OK because Ichigo seemed tentatively nervous too, and Uryu liked that it was the same for both of them as they carefully explored the feel of each other's mouth and lips.

"You're kinda more affectionate than I thought you'd be," Ichigo murmured, as their mouths parted.

Uryu froze. "And what exactly is that supposed to mean? I'm not-"

"You're starting an argument again. Stop it."

"But-"

"Discounted…" Ichigo kissed him. Uryu felt his arms wrapping around Ichigo's chest. Ichigo felt so warm. Uryu was never warm like this. Ichigo's mouth was warm too as he trailed kisses across Uryu's face and down to his neck. He didn't bite. Instead he kissed the bruises gently and lightly sucked on Uryu's skin.

How much blood did Ichigo need? And was it only Ichigo who would do the biting? Urahara hadn't really spelled it all out.

Now that he thought about it, Uryu could still taste the blood that had stained Ichigo's mouth this morning. Uryu was no stranger to the taste of blood; harsh, metallic and unnatural enough to make his stomach turn. But he'd tasted something completely different on Ichigo's lips. Sweet? There hadn't been enough of it to savour.

_And as much as I know it's disgusting to be thinking of blood like that I suppose it's natural for a vampire._

Probably essential, actually. And that made Uryu smile because the dizzy, light headedness that had accompanied Ichigo's bites this morning had been a pleasant feeling. He wouldn't mind being bitten again. And tasting the blood on Ichigo's lips afterwards.

_But that would be the taste of my blood. What about his?_

And how was he supposed to ask to try it? He thought of his new canines. They hadn't looked very sharp. It would probably hurt if he tried to bite Ichigo.

And besides the biting...

_I want to be pressed against you again. I want to explore all of this more. But I'd really like to be on top of you...though I'm not sure if you'll let me and I wouldn't really know what to do anyway._

"Ishida, you look a little out of it," Ichigo said. "Do you feel OK? I've kinda been worried in case I did something wrong earlier."

He sounded as if he was panicking. No one panicked over Uryu. Uryu smiled. "I'm fine. It's just a lot to get used to." He felt himself staring at Ichigo's neck. "Um..." Think of something. A distraction of some kind from that memory of the sweet taste in Ichigo's mouth.

Reishi. Reishi also felt good. And had always been a bit of a safety net to Uryu. Quincies liked reishi because reishi made it easier to breathe And they were something to focus on when you needed something to cling to.

"Do you think all vampires see the world like this?" Uryu asked. "Colours like this? And reishi?"

"Yeah, I guess so. Cool isn't it?"

Uryu smiled. "This was how you hid your reiatsu before. You analysed mine perfectly and altered the frequency of yours to-"

"You know I don't get that stuff. I just kinda of… hid it. Same with movement. I felt a little lighter and then I used shunpo. Wow, it was fast."

So becoming a vampire had enhanced reishi control for both of them. Uryu smiled. He'd have to try out his bow. The complex shape of Ginrei Kojaku, which had been unbearably complicated the first time Ryuken had helped him to form it, was easy to form now. The next step, however, was forming a solid bow rather than a glowing one of vibrating reishi. Uryu had managed it on several occasions, including in the fight against Ginjo, but it was difficult to keep hold of and even harder to control. Now, he might just be able to handle it. And perhaps every other Quincy technique that had eluded him would be manageable now too. Uryu felt a bit dizzy with the possibilities.

"You were already good at that control thing," said Ichigo. "You must feel like a god."

"It's definitely going to be fun." Uryu smiled as he concentrated for a moment. "Kurosaki, can you see our spirit ribbons?"

"Gimme a sec. It takes me a while to focus on those things."

Uryu smiled as he clasped his hands about the ribbons. Ichigo's, usually red, had darkened. Red was still red (and Uryu of course hated red) but the darker tone was much less tacky. His own ribbon was tangled about Ichigo's. _This must be why vampires are dependent on one another. And why we're now dependent on each other too._

"Ah, I see them." Ichigo pressed his hand against Uryu's for a second and then carefully clasped the ribbons between his fingers. "I could never see your ribbon before now. And god I tried a million times. You were always too good at hiding it."

Uryu let a breath slip past his lips at the sensation. You couldn't hurt a person by touching or grabbing their spirit ribbon, but you could surprise them. That said, nobody had ever touched Uryu's before.

_Kurosaki has nice hands._

Ichigo released the ribbons and then smiled. "So, what are we doing for the rest of the day?"

Uryu realised he was staring at Ichigo's neck again. "Won't your family be wondering where you are? Your sisters-"

"Dad's back. And I left a note last night saying I was out dealing with Hollows and that I might go straight to school. And then this afternoon I sent him a text saying I was hanging with you and Chad. I'll head back later for tea later. You should come."

"Me?"

"You've eaten with us loads of times. It wouldn't be unusual."

Uryu smiled as he pressed his head into the nook of Ichigo's neck. "Kurosaki, we should be careful not to be seen too much together. I don't want the others to be suspicious."

"I'm not letting you sleep alone here in this cold room. Come for tea. And then tell everyone you're going home. And then sneak up to my window so I can hold you all night."

"You make it sound so easy. If they find out..."

"You worry far too much. They don't even have a cure yet. Maybe there isn't one."

"They'll find one. Because Soul Society protects its own interests. You are important to them; their trump card in any battle, if you will. They will not let you remain a vampire because there may be the tiniest chance that it will affect you in their disfavour. They'll cure you. Us. And..."

And then this would end because the only reason it was working now was because they were vampires with a twisted sense of how they felt about each other. Really, Uryu should be running to Urahara and begging him to fix them. He knew that was what the old, sensible (and boring) Ishida Uryu would have done.

But right now he was happy. And Urahara had emphasised that there was nothing really wrong with being a vampire.

_So it's OK to stay like this?_

Of course it was.

But why did Uryu think the others might take this vampire thing more seriously now that he was one too?

And what would happen if they did have a cure?

_I'm not going back to the way I was. I can't._ Uryu could feel his fingers gripping Ichigo tightly.

"Hey, hey, don't worry," Ichigo murmured soothingly, as if reading Uryu's mind. "Ishida, we make a brilliant team. Do you really think they can make us do anything? You're a genius. And I'm pretty strong. We'll be fine. Besides, I'm sure they'll understand. We're happy like this, right? Nothing else matters."

Uryu nodded. He was thinking of Blue Hair again. And the noise he'd made as his body spit against the pavement. Why did he keep thinking of that? Though now, he thought he understood why someone would jump off a roof.

_If I lose this feeling... _

If he lost Ichigo. Ichigo was the reason he felt like this.

Uryu hugged him. Hugging had always been an awkward thing for Uryu. Orhime sometimes hugged him (or needed a hug if she was upset). Uryu had never really known what he was supposed to do or where his hands were meant to fall. And yet with Ichigo it was so easy.

Ichigo kissed Uryu's forehead and gently ran his fingers through Uryu's hair. "Stay over at mine, Ishida. We can head over for tea now if you like."

Uryu pressed his head against Ichigo's chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart and letting the warmth soak into him to dispel his unease. They were vampires. There was nothing wrong with it so it didn't matter if it had altered his personality slightly.

But he did need to get a grip on life. Going to Ichigo's was tempting, but if they went now then Uryu would never get his homework done. Uncompleted homework was usually something that was completely unacceptable to Uryu, but for the first time in his life it was tempting to ignore the papers waiting for him and instead find out exactly what Ichigo's blood tasted like.

_No, no, no... This is getting out of hand! I don't mind changing in some ways, but I'm not going to become a complete delinquent._

Even though at the moment he really couldn't care less.

"Before we go, I need to do my homework and catch up on class," He said finally. "Oh, and I have some sewing. I promised Keiko I'd have her dress made by Friday." Sewing was good. And he cared about that more than homework.

"Your plan is to do your homework and then sew?" said Ichigo.

"I've spent weeks on this dress." Uryu rolled away from Ichigo. Grabbing his blue yukata, he covered his nakedness and then hurried across the apartment to grab the dress that was hanging by the door. It was a ballroom dress with a black corset and red skirt. "Look." Uryu spun around with the dress to make the skirt flare out. Perfectly symmetrical gathers. Not a stitch wrong.

"It's really cute," said Ichigo.

Uryu's face felt warm. "You think so? I've done lots of dresses before, but nothing this complex. The gathers came out really well. And I like the embroidery flowers on the corset. Its the first time I've tried embroidery."

"Ishida... How could you not realise you were gay?"

Uryu almost dropped the dress. "I'm not!" He grabbed an empty pin cushion and threw it at Ichigo's head. "It's not as if I make them for myself! I'm going to do my homework. I take it it's this messy pile of paper you've clumsily dumped by the door?"

"I had more interesting things to think about than putting the paper down in an aesthetically pleasing way."

"Ah, I didn't know you had long words in your vocabulary."

Ichigo threw the pin cushion back at him. Uryu caught it neatly in his hand and carefully placed it by his sewing box. "Thank you very much, I-" He stopped. Ichigo. He'd almost said it. It seemed a little early for that. He stared at the red dress, tilting his head slightly in the hope that Ichigo wouldn't notice the warmth in Uryu's cheeks. He wasn't the type to blush and yet it seemed to be happening a lot today.

_This is really weird._

But a good weird. Because he was still smiling, And actually he rather liked smiling.

Carefully he placed the dress on a coat hanger but suddenly he found himself staring. The red skirt. Blood red.

"Are you all right?" Ichigo asked suddenly.

Uryu hung the dress up and then turned back to sorting through his homework. "I'm fine."

Homework. Homework had always been something Uryu enjoyed because he liked having things to concentrate on, whether it be making a dress or solving sums. Thinking of something like this helped him to avoid thinking about other things that he either didn't want to face or that he didn't know how to face. Like telling Ichigo what he really wanted to do to him. Sitting cross legged at the table, he looked at the maths sheet.

"I read about these sums last month! I like these!" Quickly he grabbed his pen. This wouldn't take long. He flipped open the textbook as a quick reminder and then started on the first question.

Ichigo sat close to him, his leg brushing against Uryu's. He leaned his head into his hand as he watched Uryu's pen move across the page. "Ishida..."

"What?"

"You're adorable."

Uryu turned almost as red as Keiko's dress. Adorable? Ishida Uryu? He reached up to touch his glasses but they weren't there. He settled for pushing his hair behind his ear instead and focusing hard on the textbook.

And suddenly he noticed that the cover was red. He hadn't noticed that before. He closed it, gently running his fingers against the smooth cover. Out of the corner of his eye, he stared at Ichigo, who had started to look at his own homework. Ichigo was still wearing his school uniform but Uryu's apartment was cold so he was also in a jacket that Uryu had seen him wearing a lot lately. A black and purple jacket. With buttons.

Uryu didn't like buttons; ugly things and the buttonholes were a nightmare to get right. And it wasn't often he had the heating on so zips were just easier to manage with cold, stiff hands.

Turning to face Ichigo, Uryu stretched out his hand. He touched the first button at the bottom of Ichigo's jacket and then made his fingers walk up button by button to Ichigo's neck. Red buttons.

"Those buttons look awful. Where did you get this from?"

"It's Bape clothing. Don't you dare pull anything off." Ichigo pressed his hand against Uryu. "But if they offend you that much, I'll let you unbutton-"

Uryu's phone beeped and then vibrated against the table with an irritating thrumming noise. Uryu glared at the flashing screen. Text message from Urahara. His fingers were still against the top button of Ichigo's jacket.

And as much as he wanted to, he couldn't ignore the message because he could already feel himself panicking, which wasn't something he was used to. What if Urahara somehow knew...?

Uryu grabbed the phone quickly. He paused. "It's Urahara. Wants me to go see him. Looks like it was sent to all of us."

Ichigo rummaged in his trouser pocket, frowning as he glanced at his phone. "Yeah, I have it too. What do we do?"

Uryu stared at the screen, his brow furrowing.

Ichigo sighed. "Do you think we should-"

"Be quiet. I'm thinking."

And it was more difficult than usual because his eyes kept darting back to the red buttons and then to Ichigo's neck.

_Uryu, stop it,_ he told himself. He leaned his chin against his knuckles. Think. Plan. How did they move forward?

"Kurosaki, tell them you don't want to be cured," he said finally.

"Won't that put their backs up?"

"They're going to go up anyway. If you turn up and they have a cure, you'll tell them anyway. And then you'll start a fight when they try to force you. If you tell them from this distance, you can observe how they react. I know you're not used to that but it's better than charging in."

"I wanted to tell them in person. They might understand."

No, they would never understand this relationship. All they'd see was an abrupt character change, and of course they would want them back to normal because it was what any friend would desire. They couldn't understand this new state of happiness because none of them knew what it had been like to be Ishida Uryu before who would never love anybody and who was unable to feel happiness.

"They can't know about us. They let you be as a vampire, but it will be different if they find out about me. They'd blame themselves and this time they wouldn't ignore the situation. And we can't win against all of them, can we? Urahara-san, Kuchiki-san, Sado-kun, Inoue-san and Tessai-san? And anybody else who crawls out of the woodwork? Ururu-chan and Jinta-kun aren't exactly normal either. They have an army. And... we don't want to hurt them, even if they do want to fight. You can speak to Kuchiki-san, Sado-kun and Inoue-san at school in a quieter fashion when they've had time to calm down."

And eventually they'd find out about Uryu, but maybe they could work up to that one gently.

Ichigo grimaced. "All right. I guess that makes sense. We'll think of a good text to send. What about you?"

"I'm going to the meeting."

"No. No way. It's too dangerous. I'm not letting you put yourself in that situation."

"It'll be fine. They don't know about this yet and it's an effective way to gather information about progress with the cure."

"No. Look at you. You're far too happy. They'll know something is wrong."

"Kurosaki, it will be fine. Trust me."

* * *

**Obviously the characters are a bit twisted now so the task for me is to write them as emotional vampires while still staying true to their main character traits... This is going to be tricky ; )**


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry this took so long - been very, very busy lately! Please forgive me! ; ) The next few weeks are going to be extremely busy too I'm afraid but don't worry - I won't abandon this story. I've got some ideas for some more Uryu/Ichigo stuff too but let's get this out of the way first.**

**As always, thank you for your support everyone! The reason this took me so long to write was that it ended up being much longer than I expected. I hope you like it. I can have some fun with Uryu now...**

* * *

"Good evening, Ishida-san. It's not like you to be the last to turn up. The others said you were ill. How are you feeling?"

"Much better. Thank you, Urahara-san. Sorry I'm late. I've been sleeping a lot today and I wanted a shower before I left."

_And my shower was much more interesting than usual._

Uryu still felt dizzy. What had started out as tentative kissing practice beneath the flow of warm water had soon escalated. Ichigo's hands and mouth all over _everywhere_ and a game of trying to pin one another against the shower wall, which Uryu had lost, though he didn't really mind that much since having Ichigo inside of him felt better every time. And then against the floor of the apartment when they'd been drying one another with towels, which Uryu had lost again (actually, maybe he didn't even try that hard to win).

Absolutely couldn't say any of that to Urahara though.

What would the old Ishida Uryu have said? It was hard to think like that now since that Uryu was long gone. All Uryu could really think of were Ichigo's warm hands, lips and teeth on his damp skin. And the smell of blood mingling with the steam of the shower...

...and why was he standing at the entrance to the Urahara Shop again instead of finding an opportunity to bite Ichigo's neck? Because he still hadn't managed it yet. He'd kissed Ichigo's neck a lot, but actually biting him...

Oh wait. _Vampires._ Yes. That was the reason he was here.

And the old Ishida Uryu wouldn't be grinning or smiling (and trying not to was much harder than Uryu had anticipated) because vampires were a bad thing. And he also wouldn't nervously try to justify himself. Actually, he'd probably be... serious? Thoughtful? He didn't have a clue anymore.

And everything was made even more difficult because he couldn't even gauge what Urahara was thinking as Uryu stood stupid and silent on the doorstep because he couldn't see a _thing_ in these glasses. He pressed his finger against the bridge, positioning the metal frames so that he could see over the lenses a touch.

_"I could tell them I got contacts."_

_"Yeah right. Remember when Inoue asked you about contacts, Ishida? You squealed like a girl at the thought of touching your eye."_

_"I didn't squeal like a girl!"_

_"How about you squeal for me now?"_

Uryu cleared his throat, trying to push away the thought of being pressed against Ichigo's damp body again. Change the subject. Heck, he couldn't even remember what he'd been saying to Urahara in the first place. He pushed his hair behind his ear. "Is everyone else here?"

"It's another chilly night so do come in, Ishida-san. Yes, everyone is here." Urahara paused for a moment. "Except for Kurosaki-san."

_Because I left him naked on the floor of my apartment. _

And because Ichigo had sent that text to Urahara. The one saying that he wasn't coming and that he had no intention of being cured.

Uryu forced himself to frown. "Why isn't he here?"

"That's one of the things we'll talk about."

"He's OK, isn't he?"

"Kuchiki-san and the others saw him today at school. I'll explain everything. There's actually another reason I called you all here. Ishida-san, are you sure you're well enough to be up? You seem a little flustered. It's certainly not like you."

_Get a grip, Uryu._

"It's not like me to sleep for so long, but I'll be fine."

"I won't keep you late." Urhara grinned as he flipped a fan out of his pocket and began gesturing enthusiastically about the shop. "Of course, if you need any medicines I have a fine selection just in at a discount price of-"

"I'm fine, thank you."

Uryu took a deep breath as he followed Urahara into the shop. He loosened the white scarf around his neck a little. OK, he felt as if he was in the right frame of mind now to play this act. And Urahara didn't seem to suspect anything (and really why should he since Uryu was probably the last person on the planet anyone expected Ichigo to bite). Uryu had taken measures to hide the bruises on his neck and he'd spent the entire walk here tweaking his reiatsu so that it felt as it always did. He usually kept it as sealed as possible so as not to attract Hollows, but he knew the others could still sense it. Now that he was a vampire, it seemed possible to seal it completely, but that would definitely set alarm bells ringing.

Now he just needed to concentrate and keep his thoughts away from Ichigo. And the smell and taste of blood that had followed him all the way here from Ichigo's lips.

_How do you find it so easy to bite me so many times when I can't even do it once?_

"Ah, Ishida-kun! Are you feeling better now?"

Uryu shook himself. They'd reached the lounge. Chad and Rukia were seated cross legged at the table, warming their hands on mugs of green tea. And Orihime was standing in front of him beaming.

"Y-yes," he managed.

Orihime's smile broadened and for a moment it looked as if she might give him one of those hugs that he never knew how to react to. She clapped her hands happily in front of her. "Thank goodness! I was worried. I was thinking of coming over this evening to check on you and to make you some of Orihime's special 'Make You Feel Better Stew'." She gave him a thumbs up.

He swallowed as he looked through the blur of the lenses again so that he wouldn't have to see her face. How was he supposed to respond? Orihime was someone who gave him a headache at times by saying the most ridiculous things. Or by getting so excited that her voice would split right through him.

And yet she was someone who could also take his headaches away because she was the sweetest person he knew. And you couldn't help feeling happy when you saw she was happy. Right now, she really did seem over the moon to see him. Uryu had always been a bit baffled as to why she was so pleased to see him so often. And why someone so likeable genuinely seemed to like someone like him.

_And I..._

Orihime asked for nothing. She healed them. Waited for them. Gave him little bits and pieces to put in his sewing boxes because she'd found them somewhere and had thought he might like them.

_But the one thing you want more than anything in the world... _

Kurosaki Ichigo.

"A-ah. Thank you, Inoue-san, but I am much better now. And I ate before I came here."

_I didn't mean to steal him from you, Inoue-san. _

Still she smiled. "Well, I'm just happy that you're better."

_You two would have been perfect together._

But actually that thought bothered him. It bothered him a lot. Enough to make him stare at Orihime over the tops of his glasses in a way he never had before.

Resentment.

_Because the only reason it's me and not you is because Kurosaki lost control. Otherwise it would be you two together and you screaming in the shower as he-_

"It's his own fault he was ill," Rukia muttered.

Uryu glared at her. "And why is that, Kuchiki-san?" he snapped.

She paused as she looked up from her tea, as if she hadn't expected the response. "You know why."

"No, I don't."

Slowly Rukia placed her mug down. She leaned forward a little, emphasising every word as she spoke. "You were out hunting Hollows last night weren't you, Ishida? Hollows?"

"Ho-?"

"I didn't sense any Hollows," said Orihime. "Ishida-kun, you should have called. I could have helped."

Oh. Yes. Last night he'd been guarding Orihime, hadn't he? He'd forgotten about it. And the fact that Orihime was oblivious. "There was no need to trouble you, Inoue-san."

"You weren't hurt anywhere were you?"

"Do I look like I'm hurt? I'm fine."

"Ishida... if you're still unwell you should stay home tomorrow," said Chad suddenly. "Sorry for us calling you all this way."

Off school? Again?

Actually... that wasn't a bad idea. _And Kurosaki can stay off school too. And I need to think of some way to trip him up and pin him down so I can..._

Stop grinning!

Because Chad was staring. Chad had a way of staring that didn't actually look as if he was staring, so that people never noticed his dark eyes watching them. Most of the time Chad was quiet, so quiet that Uryu could forget he was there. But Chad always listened to everything that was said. And he had a surprising habit of bringing things up later that showed he had memorised every word and action, even the little gestures that people didn't realise they used. The little things that could give away what you were really thinking.

Uryu pushed his glasses back to their normal position, in case Chad had noted that he was looking over them rather than through them. "I'll be in school tomorrow, Sado-kun. I don't want to fall behind and I'm fine. There's no need for you all to worry."

Urahara sat. He placed a mug in front of Uryu and poured the green tea from the teapot. "You're going to need your strength, Ishida-san. We have a lot to discuss tonight."

"Is this about Ichigo?" said Rukia. "Where is that fool?"

"I called all of you here originally to update you on the progress Twelfth Division has made, but actually we have something more serious to attend to. Kurosaki-san is not coming."

"What do you mean? You didn't invite him?"

"I asked him to come. He refused."

"What?!"

"He says he doesn't wish to be cured."

Everyone stared. Uryu tried to looked shocked too as he wrapped his gloved hands around the soothing warmth of the tea mug.

_"What?!"_ Rukia stood. "Get him here now. Drag him. We need to talk to him."

"I agree," said Urahara, "but first, I thought all of us should have a little chat. Although I am a little concerned because I... don't know where he is."

"You lost him?" said Uryu. _Good._

"Vampires have perfect control over their reiatsu so I doubt any of us will be able to find him. I've called his house and I do know that he is not at home right now, and that he didn't go home after school."

"Ishida, he picked up homework for you," said Chad. "Have you seen him?"

"No. Someone left homework for me but it was outside on the doorstep. I didn't wake up until almost five."

"But... but... he said he was going home. He said he was dropping off Ishida's homework and then going home. He wouldn't lie to me..." Rukia murmured. Her face creased as she balled her hand into a fist and thumped it against the table. "How dare that idiot lie to me!"

"Do we know if he's all right? What did the text say, Urahara-san?" Uryu asked. He tried to look thoughtful (because that was typical of him, right?). Chad was watching him. Staring hard at the scarf around Uryu's neck.

Urahara held up his hot-dog shaped mobile phone. "I'm sorry, Urahara-san, but I'm not coming. This is about a cure, right? I don't want to be cured. I'm not out looking for anyone to bite though so please don't worry. Will call later. Need to be alone for a bit."

While Urahara was speaking, Uryu casually took off his coat, gloves and then unravelled the scarf from his neck. _Just in case you do suspect anything, Sado-kun, this should put your mind at ease._

Because there was nothing to see. No bite marks or bruises from Ichigo.

Uryu had spent years mastering the art of concealing bruises and cuts. Firstly to make sure Ryuken didn't know about his nightly activities as a Quincy (although of course Ryuken had known - purposefully locking the windows and doors on one or two occasions so that Uryu couldn't get back in); secondly to avoid unwanted attention at school from teachers or pupils. He used foundation and concealer to accomplish the task, followed by a couple of sprays to make sure nothing rubbed off against his clothes.

_"Why the hell do you have make up?" Ichigo thundered, his mouth gaping as Uryu knelt in front of the mirror with the bottles and brushes lined up neatly beside him._

_"I've been fighting Hollows for years, Kurosaki. And unlike you, I have to use my real body to do it. It's useful to hide bruises and avoid questions."_

_"But Inoue can heal anything so that-"_

_"Inoue doesn't need to heal everything. And I don't want her to worry so sometimes I hide things. And don't forget I was doing this for years before the rest of you. This was necessary."_

_"You're so gay it's unbelievable!"_

_"I don't wear it on a daily basis!"_

_"You're winging again."_

_"You started it! And if you hadn't mauled me I wouldn't need to cover anything up."_

_"You liked being mauled. You're so gay."_

_"I'm not gay!"_

_"Then what do you call this?" _

_Ichigo's arms around him, his mouth pressing against Uryu's neck._

_"An exception...?"_

"Ishida? Ishida!" snapped Rukia.

Uryu looked up quickly. "Sorry, I'm just... why wouldn't Kurosaki want to be cured? And, more importantly, why wasn't anyone watching him?"

"I was," said Rukia. "I watched him all day. We had lunch together, but he was tired and moody and... shut up, Ishida!"

"E-eh? I didn't say anything!"

"I know what you're thinking! 'I told you so'. That's it, right? Well, well done for being correct! We should have paid more attention to him. It's too late now!" She folded her arms as she scowled. Uryu could feel the vibrations as she tapped her foot impatiently against the tatami flooring.

She had every reason to blame herself. _Because for the record, I was right, Kuchiki-san. And none of you were concerned about the danger. Fortunately, I'm glad things turned out this way._

"Poor Kurosaki-kun. He must be terribly confused by all this," Orihime murmured. "I wonder what it's like to be a vampire?"

"He told me he liked it," said Uryu. "Yesterday at school he said that it was 'cool'. He said colours were different and that he just felt happier than normal."

"We can't let him stay as a vampire. He was bitten against his will," said Chad. "Whatever he is feeling is the result of something being passed into his blood from a bite. It's not real."

"But it makes him happy," said Uryu.

"Drugs make people happy too. Doesn't mean people should be allowed to take them."

"Urahara-san said there was nothing wrong with being a vampire."

"Ishida-san, do you really think we should let Kurosaki-san be?" said Urahara.

"You've changed your tone," Rukia added. "Finally come round to the fact that vampires are sexy."

Through the blur of his glasses, Uryu could feel the shopkeeper's stare. And Chad's. And Rukia's. And even Orihime. Sweet Orihime; as daft as a brush at times, but still perfectly capable of reading him with pinpoint accuracy. Just like Chad.

Uryu took a deep breath as he pushed his hair behind his ear. He looked over his glasses. "Vampires are not 'sexy', Kuchiki-san." _Liar. _"I'm just trying to discuss this calmly. We need to assess the danger because that will indicate how fast we must move to address the issue. Running around town looking for Kurosaki will accomplish nothing, particularly if he does not want to be found. Worse, it could cause him to panic. He may even see the need to defend himself. We need to talk to him in a calm fashion. Do you think he is looking for someone to bite? I feared that, but it hasn't seemed as if he was losing control. I even asked him about girls. Just to see if there was anyone he seemed to be paying close attention to."

"Really?" Orihime was suddenly leaning so far forward that she was almost on the table. Sweet eyes wide and hopeful, and lips quivering. Uryu knew she didn't even realise how eager and desperate she was.

He should have pitied her. And he should have felt guilty. He knew those were the emotions he should be feeling (because the old Ishida Uryu was definitely capable of those feelings). But now... nothing except a satisfied, selfish happiness that he knew was unlike him.

"Yes, I asked him, but he didn't give anything away. He doesn't seem to be looking for a partner. He said he had other things to deal with in his life apart from a girlfriend."

Orihime's eyes lowered. Slowly she sat back on her knees, clutching her mug tightly. "Oh. Well, we're all very busy with our last year of high school after all."

"He's definitely distracted by something," said Chad. "I've seen him a few times clenching and unclenching his fists. And staring into nothing. He's not been that distant since he lost his powers."

"Urahara, I saw some rice cakes in the kitchen. Can we eat them?" Rukia asked suddenly.

"Cakes?" said Urahara. "Well... yes. I think I put them away in one of the cupboards somewhere."

"Perfect! I love sticky rice cakes! Inoue, would you be so kind?!"

"Oh? Oh, of course."

Uryu pushed his glasses a little further down his nose. Orihime seemed to be trying very hard to be cheerful as she stood. Rukia watched her closely. And Urahara watched Rukia and then tried to exchange some kind of look with Uryu. Uryu frowned. They wanted Orihime out of the room? Everybody was quiet as she closed the door and pattered down the corridor towards the kitchen.

"Ishida, you asked him about girls," Rukia said in a hushed voice. "What about boys?"

?!

"Sorry...?" he asked.

"Boys."

"EH?! Kurosaki-san is-" Urahara stopped as he dribbled tea down himself. Quickly he dabbed at himself with his sleeve. "Now that one missed me by..."

"B-boys?" said Uryu.

"I don't believe anyone said that a vampire's partner has to be female," said Rukia coyly.

"Good point," Chad muttered.

_Hang on. Hang on...!_

"Well..." Urahara cleared his throat. "Well... is there any reason to..."

"He likes boys," said Rukia.

"What?!" Uryu cried.

"You think so too, Kuchiki?" said Chad.

"Seriously?!" said Urahara.

Uryu knew his mouth had dropped, just like Urahara's. Chad and Rukia had both known?

_How come I didn't?_

Because out of all of them, it was probably Uryu who spent the most time with Ichigo. Not that they hung out a lot, but Rukia was busy in Soul Society and Chad worked long hours, so it was always Ichigo and Uryu who ended up sat together in the library.

And Uryu _knew_ he was a good judge of people. Just as good as Chad, in fact. How could he have missed something this big?

_And how do you spot if someone likes boys anyway?_

"I don't know for sure and I don't think he realises it himself," said Rukia. "I've just kind of been suspecting for a while. He's a teenage boy and he never looks at girls. He never even looks at Rangiku's breasts. And everybody looks at her breasts."

"I have never looked," said Uryu flatly.

"Liar. I've seen you."

Uryu stood. "I have never-!"

"Ishida, she's teasing you," said Chad.

"Oh Ishida-kun, you're going red again!" Rukia chimed. "I'm getting good at drawing out your inner perverted teenager."

He'd taken the bait and given her the reaction she wanted. Firmly Uryu closed his mouth, fighting the urge to say that he was most definitely _not_ interested in... _that _part (or any part really, it seemed) of a female's body. He sat. "I have never looked," he muttered. "And surely you have better things to do than make fun of people."

Urahara sighed. "Well, if you're right about Kurosaki-san, this could change everything. Being a teenager is frustrating enough and I have no doubt it's even worse if you don't realise your own sexuality - not that I would know of course! But that coupled with a vampire's passionate emotions and longing for partnership could make him a little more uncontrollable than we foresaw."

"You really think Kurosaki is that way inclined?" said Uryu. Well, obviously Kurosaki was _now_, but Uryu had assumed that was some weird effect of being a vampire.

But did that mean Ichigo had liked Uryu before all of this?

Seriously?

_What on earth did he see in me?_

"He could be," said Chad. "I've tried to get him to talk about girls before. He has no interest. We shouldn't mention this to Inoue, but we definitely need to-"

"I found them!" Orihime grinned as she skipped into the lounge with crumbs around her mouth. She set a rice cake down in front of everyone and then piled the rest in front of her. "Thank you, Urahara-san! They're really tasty!"

The room was silent as everyone picked at the rice cakes. Uryu found himself dismantling his between his fingers. Ichigo was... gay? Why didn't he ever say anything? Whatever Rukia said, surely Ichigo would have realised...?

_And was I the same before you bit me? _

But he'd definitely never looked at boys. He hadn't looked at girls that much either, but he supposed he did look because he noticed when the girl in the sewing shop styled her hair differently, or even when Orihime had a nice dress on (which was something he rarely admitted to himself even when he did notice).

_What if I'm not supposed to be like this?_

"I think one or two of us need to find him and speak to him," said Chad at last. "Calmly, of course. Kuchiki-san, you're very close to Ichigo. And I know him very well myself. I think he might open up to us."

Uryu accidentally crushed the remains of the rice cake in his hands. _You two think you know him better than me? _

Both of them had neglected Ichigo after he lost his powers and it had been Uryu who had kept an eye on him. _And it was me he always sought when he needed someone to talk to._

Uryu shook himself. Such selfish thoughts weren't like him. And it really didn't matter who tried to speak with Ichigo.

_Why am I even getting annoyed by this?_

And annoyed was the right word. He could feel his fingers twitching. It took more than this to annoy him. In fact, barely anything annoyed him. Except Ichigo.

_Particularly how I really want to bite him but can't seem to._

"I'll send Ichigo a message now," said Chad. "See if he will agree to meet tonight just to talk." He flicked up his phone and began thumbing at the keys.

"Poor Kurosaki-kun," Orihime murmured as she nibbled on a second cake. "He'll be all right, won't he? He won't bite anyone?"

"He'd better not," said Rukia, punching her fist into the palm of her hand.

"Well, this brings us onto our next subject," said Urahara. "I have some news from Twelfth Division." Reaching below the table, he pulled out a small jar of multicoloured pastel tablets.

Uryu kept his breathing perfectly calm and level. Calm and level. But beneath the table, he clenched his hands hard against his legs. He swore he could feel the colour draining from his face (even though he knew that wasn't really possible); a chemical combination of fear and panic that made him feel sick.

Rukia leaned forward. "Is that a cure?"

"No. Well, not for Kurosaki-san. There are different phases to becoming a vampire, it seems. The first is a bite. The second is intercourse, although they can happen in either order. Both acts release different chemicals into the blood that, combined, turn a person into a vampire. But this doesn't happen instantly. It takes around twenty four hours for the transformation to be complete. For Kurosaki, it is too late, but Twelfth Division have found a way to prevent it at an earlier stage, which I feel may be useful to us while they continue their research."

_For Kurosaki it's too late..._

That was good. But Uryu was still clutching his legs hard as a dizzy feeling spiralled about his head. _Because for me..._

Twenty four hours had not passed. No matter how many times he counted the hours in his head, he wasn't even close.

"In addition, these colourful pills can provide protection against a vampire. If everyone takes one now, you will not be able to transform into a vampire even if you are bitten. It's like a vaccine," said Urahara. "I recommend that all of us take one to be on the safe side."

_I can't breathe. _

Familiar fingers of dread clutching his heart and lungs. But even more frantic than anything he'd ever known. Hollows. Ghosts. Invisible blood. This jar of pastel colours was worse than any of them.

And he couldn't let any of the others know.

Hiding fear was something he'd mastered a long time ago to avoid Ryuken's frustration.

_Hollows aren't really interested in you sine there are plenty of spirits around. Learn to ignore them. And for god's sake learn not to make such a scene in public!_

Although now he felt as if he was four years old again without any ability to hide anything as a Hollow strode down the street in front of him.

He managed to grab his tea and bring the porcelain to his lips to hide his expression. Quickly he looked around the table. Nobody had noticed. Even Chad. They were too busy nodding at Urahara and smiling at the jar.

"Ah, this could be a sneaky plan," said Rukia. "If any of us get bitten by Kurosaki, we can play along and then slip him the real cure when we have it."

"That's a good plan," said Chad with a nod of his head.

Uryu licked his lips as he placed the mug down. He had to say something before they noticed him struggling to breathe. He pressed his fingers against the bridge of his glasses. "You sound excited by this plan, Kuchiki-san," he said, speaking extra slowly and calmly. "I always knew you-"

Rukia kicked him under the table. Hard enough to make Uryu's eyes water. On a positive note though, it gave him the excuse to make a strangled breathing noise.

"Maybe it'll be you who gets bitten, Ishida, and then _you_ can have fun playing along."

Orihime gasped. "Kurosaki-kun biting Ishida-kun!" she squeaked (and Uryu wasn't sure how to read her oddly excited reaction since he was too busy trying to control his breathing to dwell on it).

"Um... well..." Urahara flipped his fan up in front of his face quickly to hide his expression. "Well, on that note. Bon appetite! Captain Kurotsuchi has assured me there are no unwanted side effects. I've already tested one on Jinta too and he's still alive."

He pushed the jar into the centre of the table. Rukia leaned forward first, sighing as she picked a pink pill. "To think I'll never know what it's like to become a vampire. Is it even possible for a Shinigami to become one?"

"I'm not sure to be honest," said Urahara. "But there's no harm in being prepared."

Rukia swallowed the tablet and then passed the jar to Orihime. Uryu watched as everyone chose a tablet and swallowed it.

_What do I do?_

"Ishida." Chad moved the jar in front of Uryu.

_What do I do!_

"They're the size of horse pills," he muttered.

"It's all right if you have trouble swallowing. It's girls who shouldn't," said Rukia.

Urahara, in the midst of washing his tablet down with green tea, choked.

Orihime frowned. "Why would girls-?"

"It's some old saying," said Chad quickly.

"Don't tease me," said Uryu. "Ryuken used to shove every pill and medicine in the country at me whenever I was ill. I just don't like taking them."

Which was true. Ryuken had barely even noticed Uryu existed most of the time, but the moment he'd sneezed, coughed or even looked a bit different Ryuken had grabbed him by his collar and dragged him screaming to the medicines cabinet. And somehow the tablets had always ended up stuck in his throat.

_Uryu, you just think they're stuck in your throat._

Uryu swore he'd turned blue once while Ryuken had stood there frowning at him. He probably would have died if he hadn't coughed the damn thing up onto the carpet at Ryuken's feet.

He stared at the jar. He could try and hold one of the tablets in his mouth and spit it into his tea...

But that wouldn't work. What if it dissolved on his tongue?

_What if they notice?_

_And what if I swallow?_

_And what if this ends?_

Too many what ifs. Too many variables. Plans didn't succeed with any what ifs.

"Ishida, just shut up and swallow it," said Rukia. "A single pill won't kill you. They taste like sweets. I'm quite impressed."

"All right. I just don't like them."

_What do I do?_

Not enough time to think.

That tightening of his chest again. The fingers of a panic attack that he couldn't put off for much longer.

Slowly Uryu picked an orange pill from the jar, clutching it hard so that the others couldn't see he was trembling.

_But you know this thing with Kurosaki isn't real. He pinned you down. He practically raped you. This pill will take things back to how they should be. _That was the way the sensible Ishida Uryu would think.

_But things are so much better this way._

Before this...

_I hated being alive. _

Uncurling his fingers, he stared at the pill. Urahara and Chad were watching him closely. Very closely.

_They know something is wrong._

And Uryu couldn't breathe.

_"Ishida, promise me you won't do anything stupid," Ichigo said, hugging Uryu just before he left the apartment to walk to Urahara's. "And I really mean it. If they suspect you in any way, get out of there. Promise me, Ishida. We won't let them separate us, right?"_

Uryu placed his glasses on the table and stood. He picked up the tea and held the pill to his lips, whilst simultaneously taking just enough steps to ensure there was nobody standing in between him and the door.

And then he ran. It was the most ridiculous, humiliating and clumsy escape plan (especially for someone like him who took pride in his plans) but sometimes simple was effective. And the shock factor seemed enough to delay the others since Uryu could feel the baffled silence behind him.

_And I'll tell Kurosaki I came up with something better than this because this is atrocious._

Urahara moved more quickly than the others. "Ishida-san!"

But Uryu was already at the other end of the shop. His hands shook as he slid the door open.

"Hado no san-ju-san. Soukatsui!"

Uryu froze at the sound of Urahara's words, something that would have cost him dearly if it were not for the fact that he'd spent years fighting Hollows and honing his instincts. He ducked without even realising it. Red light tore through the paper doors, filling the shop with the smell of smoke. Urahara had attacked him.

_He actually attacked me!_

But Uryu knew he should be running, not staring. He tried to slip through the wreckage of the doors, but Urahara's hand closed about his wrist.

Panic. Uryu could feel himself choking. "Let go!" he roared.

"Ishida-san, we need to-"

Uryu swung a seele schneider from his belt, activating the blade and thrusting it forward. Urahara released him quickly, ducking just in time for the blade to tear through his hat rather than his face. "Aye aye!" He held up both of his hands in surrender. "Ishida-san, there's no need for this. Let's just talk."

"You attacked first!"

"At the level I performed it, that kido can burn a paper door, but would act as no more than a stun against someone like you. You _know_ that yourself since you can sense the strength of reishi. Ishida-san, there's no need for panic. Let's just talk."

_You have no idea what taking that pill means!_

Shivering alone in the apartment at night. And holding yourself close because there would never be anybody else to make you feel better about life.

Rukia, Chad and Orihime were clustering in the corridor, staring with open mouths at the front of the shop. Uryu dived through the burning doorway, swinging the seele schneider to clear everything out of his way. The blue blade shivered. Uryu couldn't concentrate and it took a lot of concentration to control the blade of a seele schneider. Shoving it roughly into his pocket, he focused on running. He stepped into the night air with hirenkyaku.

_I'm faster than any of them. They won't catch me if-_

"Hado no san-ju-san. Soukatsui!"

Kido again. But at least outside Uryu had room to move and there was now a much greater distance between himself and Urahara. Uryu turned his head. He hadn't seen kido used much, but it always piqued his curiosity. Watching the incantation shape and transform the reishi in the air was fascinating to a Quincy who could see the process. Now he was a vampire, he could see every step in slow motion. And he could see exactly how the words Urahara had shouted created the burst of crimson light that was now rushing towards him.

And since he could see it so clearly, it should be easy to cancel it out. Panic turned to intrigue.

_I have to try this._

He held his hand out, letting the starcross medallion dangle from his wrist to amplify his ability to gather and control the reishi in the air. The particles clustered around the silver shape. Uryu matched the frequency perfectly and then inverted it.

Urahara's kido hit the reishi. For a split second Uryu wondered what he'd do if this didn't work, but of course he shouldn't have worried because his control and perception of these kinds of things was flawless. The red flash dissipated. Cancelled out perfectly without Uryu even feeling the warmth of the red fire against his cheeks.

Urahara froze, standing mid-air a few metres from Uryu. "I see you've learned some new skills, Ishida-san. Indeed, your control and manipulation of reishi is masterful. A Quincy's abilities merged with a vampire's, correct?"

Uryu leapt back to put extra distance between them. Urahara was as guarded as Uryu when it came to showing off his attacks to others. Everyone was entitled to their privacy but Uryu kept a close watch on him anyway, since analysing people and their strategies was part of what he did. He didn't know much about Urahara's zanpaktou, but he did know that Urahara had a talent for surprising people.

_And I also know that he analyses people like I do. _

And it wouldn't surprise Uryu one bit if Urahara had already thought about the possibility of having to attack them, for whatever reason, and what strategy would be best appropriate for each teenager.

_Though it seems as if I've managed to surprise you too, Urahara-san._

Uryu stood for a moment, letting steady breaths fill his chest as he ordered his thoughts. "Anything else you want to throw at me, Urahara-san?" he asked.

"Just a simple question, if you will. Were you bitten by Kurosaki against your will?"

"Against my will?"

"That is what I asked. A yes or no will suffice."

"I wouldn't say it was against my will."

"I'm not sure I believe you. Perhaps what he did after the bite was consensual, but only because of whatever he injected you with using his teeth."

"Urahara-san!" Rukia called. She leapt up from the ground outside of the shop to stand beside him in the air. And right behind was Chad. Of course, he was airborne now too after his fullbring training.

_And like Urahara, I have considered everyone's strengths and weaknesses._

Though it had never been about the possibility of fighting them.

_Even though it should have been because I am a Quincy and you are all allied with the Shinigami._

Orihime was the only one still on the ground. Her hands were clasped in front of her chest as she stared up at all of them. Even down there, she was a danger because she had other strengths besides healing and she wasn't as helpless as she seemed.

_I wanted to protect all of you._

"Urahara-san..." Rukia stared between Urahara and Uryu. Uryu knew she was intelligent enough to realise what was going on, but it seemed as if she didn't want to believe it.

"It appears we have two vampires rather than one to deal with now," said Urahara.

_And now you've all turned against me._

"Ichigo bit you, Ishida?" said Chad. "I knew something was different."

Uryu sighed. "Sado-kun, you are excellent at perceiving a situation, but fortunately for me you rarely act upon it because you like to see the best in everyone rather than the worst and so you let your little suspicions slide. And that, by the way, is a weakness you should probably think about correcting some time."

"Ishida-san, can I assume like Kurosaki-san that you are unwilling to let us cure you?" said Urahara.

Uryu still held the tablet in his hand. Crushing it between his fingers, he loosened his hand and allowed the orange dust to scatter on the breeze.

"Ah, I see," said Urahara. "But Ishida-san, you are a highly intelligent man. You must know that whatever you feel as a vampire, and towards Kurosaki-san, is not real." Urahara slowly ran his hand across his cane, turning the wood into the silver of a zanpaktou.

Uryu leapt back another few steps. "First kido and now you draw your zanpaktou? That's a little unfair. What happened to you belittling me about Kurosaki? Vampires are not bloodthirsty, uncontrollable monsters, Urahara-san. Vampires do not regularly go on a rampage – indeed, it's almost unheard of, Urahara-san. They also do not consume souls. Soul Society knows they exist, but pays little attention because they are not a threat. That's what you told me, ignoring _my_ concerns. Kurosaki, Kurosaki, Kurosaki! That's all any of you really care about! As soon as something is wrong with a Quincy you all leap into action instantly!"

"I also told you, Ishida-san that the situation could be much worse. And how it is worse. Because Kurosaki apparently lost control and attacked you. And no matter what you say and feel now, you know this is not what you wanted. I trusted Kurosaki, but it appears there were aspects to him that I did not understand. It's been many years since I was a teenager afterall."

"Ishida, Ichigo _bit_ you?" gasped Rukia. _"You?"_

"Kuchiki-san, what's the problem? It's just like you said. If he wants a partner then may he'll approach a nice girl. She likes him, they have some fun together for a while and then Soul Society finds the cure. La la la, everyone is happy and everything goes back to the way it was. Only it turns out he found a boy. Oh, and there's no need to find that cure because neither Kurosaki nor I want things to go back to the way they were."

"But... but... I didn't think he'd bite anyone! I was joking! He bit_ you_? You mean you two now..." Rukia pressed her fingers together. "Wow..." she murmured.

"Ishida, you know Urahara-san is right. Listen to the things you're saying. You're not yourself," said Chad.

"I would rather die than go back to my old self!"

"Ishida-kun!" Orihime gasped from below. "How can you say that? You're a wonderful person!"

Uryu hadn't even realised she could hear everything from down there. He glanced at her staring up at him, but as soon as he did he saw Urahara move. Quickly Uryu stepped back and held the seele schneider in front of him. With his other hand he formed his bow. Not Ginrei Kojaku, but the solid bow that he had never been able to control before. It came together so easily now.

_I'll have to think of a name for it. _

Urahara paused, his eyes warily taking in the unfamiliar bow. "Ishida-san, you know we cannot let you escape. From your reaction to the pills, it is obvious that the twenty-four hour mark has not yet passed so if we can force you to take one then you'll be back to normal. I was careless with Kurosaki-san and I will not make the same mistake again. We have to find a way to turn both you and Kurosaki-san back to normal. If we perform a detailed analysis of your blood, I'm sure we'll find something to help Kurosaki-san."

It was starting to rain. Through the droplets of spitting water, Uryu looked between all of them. Separately, he was certain he could outthink any of them, even Urahara. But everyone together was a different story. With ginto, he would probably be able to restrain one or two of them, but not for long. And he wasn't sure if anything like that would work against Chad's strength, particularly as Uryu's knowledge of ginto was more limited than he would like to admit.

_One hit from Sado-kun and I'm out._

Chad's weakness was his lack of speed but the others would make up for that. As a group, all of them could easily make up for one another's weaknesses.

_I can't win this fight._

But fortunately one of his strengths was speed. Urahara was prone to surprising people, but Uryu was certain that even he couldn't match a Quincy's quick movements. And with his reiatsu sealed they wouldn't be able to chase him once he was out of sight.

But it seemed Urahara was thinking the same thoughts. Just as Uryu turned to run he heard Urahara's call. "Bakudou no roku-ju-ichi. Rukujyoukourou."

Yellow light split the air with a high-pitched whine. Uryu turned quickly, stretching his fingers out and concentrating to dispel the binding kido. But the others were moving too. He could hear Rukia muttering something and see the reishi gathering around her as the full kido incantation began to take shape. He was certain he could block it but Urahara was bringing his sword down and Chad was leaping towards him as the fullbring power took hold of his arm.

"Scream, Benhime!" Urahara called.

Uryu leapt aside as the red light squealed through the evening and then fired a volley of arrows. Nothing powerful enough to hurt anyone, but it was enough to make Rukia dive for cover and to stop Chad and Urahara in their tracks as they flung their arms in front of their faces.

_And now I run._

But as soon as Uryu used hirenkyaku he found himself banging into an orange wall. He stared as light surrounded him on all four sides. A familiar, warming feeling brushed against his skin. _Soten kishun?_ Orihime's healing technique? He frowned as he glanced down at her.

"Urahara-san, I'll only be able to hold him for a few seconds at the most," said Orihime.

_She's using it as a barrier!_

Uryu hadn't even realised she could do that. And possibly Origime hadn't herself until now. But no time to think. Uryu fired a stream of arrows. Cracks split across the orange shell but Urahara was already upon him. There was something in his hand that looked suspiciously like a needle.

_He's going to knock me out._

Uryu gasped. Soten kishun was crumbling. But he'd never get away in time. "No... Please..."

_Don't turn me back to who I was!_

"Getsuga tensho!"

The power of Ichigo's attack ripped through the air between Uryu and Urahara. Even though it didn't touch Orihime's soten kishun, the proximity of the power was enough to shatter it. Uryu blinked. Ichigo stood protectively in front of him, his bankai robes rippling in the evening breeze as he stood facing Urahara. He gripped the hilt of Tensa Zangetsu so tightly that his knuckles had turned white.

"Ah, good evening, Kurosaki-san," Urahara smiled. Nervously. He leapt back several steps.

"K-kurosaki...?" Uryu murmured.

Ichigo looked around carefully at Urahara and the others before turning and gently cupping Uryu's face. "I felt your reiatsu. Ishida, you promised-"

Uryu hugged him hard. _I'm in the process of getting out of here. You didn't need to come. If they capture you, if they... _And even though he tried to speak he found he couldn't say a word. His jaw was shivering and he had to grit his teeth to stop a choke from bursting through his lips. _You always run in without thinking and it makes you vulnerable._

But if Ichigo hadn't come...

_They would have..._

His face felt wet. Too wet to be from the weak flecks of rain. Though he didn't quite understand why he was crying.

"It's fine," Ichigo murmured. He kissed Uryu's forehead and smiled. That stupid smile Ichigo used on everyone when he told them it would be all right.

And now Uryu knew why so many people believed in it. He pressed his face against Ichigo's shoulder but he was still trembling too much to speak. People cried all the time. But Uryu didn't. He hadn't cried since Sensei had died. He hated it. Useless. Powerless. _Pathetic. _And yet he couldn't stop.

_And I hate you for seeing me like this. _He clutched the front of Ichigo's robes tightly as he lowered his head. _Don't look at me..._

Ichigo's smile faded into something more painful. He tangled his fingers about Uryu's tightly and then glanced down at the others, who had retreated to the ground quickly to put distance between themselves and Ichigo. _Of course, _Uryu thought. _They would never dare attack _you.

For one, Ichigo was far too valuable to them to risk injuring.

_Unlike me._

"Don't you all think this is a little out of hand?" said Ichigo. "You're over reacting. I know you're worried we'll go out biting people, but we won't. And I'm telling the truth this time. I have Ishida. And he has me. That's all we need."

"Ichigo, you're not yourself! You would never have bitten Ishida and dragged him into this! Do you realise what you've done to him?" Chad roared. "At least you've been acting like yourself, but look at him! _That is not Ishida!"_

Uryu gritted his teeth as he shook. Clutching Ichigo's hand hard he let the sob in his throat escape before screaming at Chad. "I'm _glad_ he bit me! Sado-kun, you have _no_ idea what it was like to live as me! _I am not going back!"_

"Ishida... how can it have been that bad? You have friends. You have the best grades in the school. We-"

"Friends? You're only 'friends' with me because of Kurosaki! He's the one you all care about the most!"

"Ishida-kun, that's not true!" said Orihime. "How can you-"

"Kurosaki-kun, Kurosaki-kun, _Kurosaki-kun!_ Remember Hueco Mundo? Don't think I didn't notice the fact that you were still screaming his name even when an Espada was tearing my arm off!"

Orihime's mouth dropped. And then closed firmly. Her fists tightened by her sides.

"Ishida!" Chad roared. "How-"

"Sado-kun, it's fine," said Orihime. "I know. I know I called Kurosaki-kun a lot at that time, but Ishida-kun I called your name too. I would have died inside if either of you-"

"But you were more concerned with Kurosaki because he means more to you than I do! Just like now! You all attack me and yet every one of you lectured me when I was on guard after Kurosaki became a vampire. _And I was right!" _

Orihime stared. She had that look in her eye that Uryu saw when she was facing a Hollow; facing something she was frightened of but facing it because she was determined to do what must be done. "Ishida-kun, you have to take one of those tablets. Even if you hate for me for it..." She held her hands to her hair. The flower clips nestled among the auburn glowed.

Ichigo suddenly scooped Uryu into his arms. Uryu felt the cold, rain speckled air burning against his cheeks as Ichigo sped forward with shumpo. He hadn't realised how fast Ichigo could move in Bankai. They were already in the next street.

"Where are we going?" said Uryu.

"We're leaving of course, idiot."

"I can run myself! I'm faster than you actually."

"Don't care."

Actually he wouldn't be able to run himself. Uryu knew that he wouldn't be able to move at all if he were left by himself. He grimaced as he took a deep breath, but it seemed to make him quiver even more. "I left my glasses," he muttered.

"Means they won't get in the way when we kiss."

Uryu managed to smile but it didn't make him feel as better as he'd hoped. "Are they following?" he asked.

"No."

Uryu listened to the sound of Ichigo's drumming heart. He could hear his own heartbeat too; a violent judder that echoed throughout his entire body. A panic that strangled him. And that was so unlike him.

Because even though Ichigo smiled and said everything would be fine, it wouldn't be. Because Urahara and the others practically had an army compared with the two of them. And progress was already being made on a cure.

_I'm frightened of losing Kurosaki._

Life had been easier to live after Ichigo invited him to lunch. And after Chad started waiting for him at the school gates in the morning. And after Orihime started giving him sweets and adzuki pancakes because she thought he needed to eat more.

_I'm frightened of losing everyone. _

Uryu pressed his face a little more tightly to Ichigo, tilting his face so that it was hidden from view. Fear. Anger. Rejection. Tears and convulsions inside of him that he didn't know how to deal with. "Kurosaki..."

_I don't remember ever feeling like this before._

"...I feel..."

_I don't even remember what I felt before this._

"...really..."

_I know it was painful._

"...weird."

_But I don't remember anything hurting this much._


	8. Chapter 8

**Another update! It is a little short compared with previous chapters, but that is only because I've been spoiling you all with 20-page updates ; ) This is 8 pages.**

**No Uryu or Ichigo this time. But I promise I'll be nice to them in the next chapter. I think they need a break. :D In the meantime, I'm determined to make a character out of Chad.**

**Thank you everyone for over 5000 hits to this story! Big thanks to all the regular reviewers - apologies for not replying to everyone yet :(**

* * *

"Well... that didn't go very well," Urahara muttered.

Urahara, Chad, Rukia and Orihime were back in the lounge and light of the Urahara Shop; hands wrapped tensely around warm mugs but nobody making a move to drink. The strengthening rain thundered against the roof, emphasising the silence inside.

For a long time they'd stood outside in the rain staring at where Ichigo and Uryu had been. Shock and realisation sinking into damp skin. Eventually Urahara had bustled them inside, muttered a lot about the broken door as they all boarded it up together, and then giving everyone yukata to wear while their clothes dried by the fireplace in one of the back rooms.

_Why didn't we keep an eye on Ishida?_ The same question going round and round Chad's head.

He wanted to punch something, but that wasn't the way to react. Let the passion that drives you to over-react flow out. That's what Abuelo had always said. Rage was powerful, true. But more power could be gained by controlling and understanding your situation so that you could choose the best way forward, which didn't always involve fists.

What had happened was his fault. He'd known something was wrong with Ichigo, but he hadn't faced it. How typical of him. Always wanting to believe in the best of others. Uryu was right; it was a weakness.

_It's how Ginjo and the others tricked me._

And if ever there was something that made him want to use his fists again to pound the world, that was it. Ginjo and the fact that Chad had placed Ichigo and Uryu in danger back then. Uryu was lucky not to have been killed by Tsukishima and Ginjo's double attack.

And now Uryu was in trouble again because of Chad's oversight.

Ichigo didn't look at girls. Chad had noticed that long before any vampires appeared. Last night, when he'd sensed Uryu outside Orihime's apartment, Chad had taken up a watchful post outside of Tatsuki's since she was Ichigo's other close female friend. But really, why would Ichigo be interested in girls as a vampire when he'd never looked at them before? But Uryu? Chad hadn't seen that one coming.

_And I should have. _

Out of everyone, Uryu arguably provoked the most emotional response from Ichigo.

_They squabble like an old married couple._

And they were happy when they argued.

But still... Ichigo and Uryu?

Chad wasn't homophobic. He knew a couple of guys who liked guys, but Ichigo and Uryu? His two closest friends?

_Sucking each other's blood...?_

Stop right there, he told himself, quickly forcing an image from his mind that he _really_ didn't want to see.

"I don't believe it," Rukia murmured, her hands tightening around her tea. "Ichigo bit him."

"Ishida-kun was crying," Orihime added softly.

"He actually bit him."

"We made him cry."

"He bit him!" Rukia slammed her palms against the table, hard enough to send pale spots of tea across the wood. "When the hell did this happen!"

"Ichigo was late to school and Ishida didn't turn up at all," said Chad. "It was probably this morning."

_And I should have gone to check on Ishida._

Because he had wondered. Wondered, but been too afraid to face it.

Rukia balled her hand into a fist. "Well, I'm not going to sit around. We have to speak with them and make them realise that-"

"No." Chad grabbed her arm as she stood.

"Sado! We-"

"No."

"Ishida-kun was crying..." Orihime murmured.

Silence. The roar of the rain battering the roof and windows, echoing throughout the shop. Slowly Rukia sat.

Chad didn't like to see people upset. Life was too short for tears. Uryu was never upset. Though often he seemed down for one reason or another that Chad had never been sure about, but Uryu didn't show it. And because Chad knew Uryu didn't like people to know what he was feeling, Chad never let on when he knew something was bothering him. Instead, he'd just buy him a drink from the vending machine and maybe sit with him silently or talk about the colour of the sky. Uryu seemed to appreciate that.

But seeing Uryu with tears streaming down his face was upsetting. Uryu was used to being upset or worried and not showing it.

_So whatever he is feeling must really be hurting him_.

"We've done too much tonight and everyone got a little carried away," said Urahara. "We need to relax and approach this situation in a more delicate manner. In addition, it's worth bearing in mind that Kurosaki-san and Ishida-san make for a slightly frightening combination. Pure strength and high intellect. We don't want them to panic."

"We attacked Ishida-kun," said Orihime.

"No, all we did was try to restrain him. Nobody had any intention of harming him," said Chad. "Whatever he is feeling now, deep down he knows we were only trying to do the right thing. Urahara tried to talk to him. I don't think anything was going to calm him down. For now, we should let Ichigo take care of him."

_Ichigo, it's not your fault. I don't know what happened, but I know you would never have wanted to hurt Ishida, and you would have resisted losing control with everything you had. I should have watched you more carefully and I apologise for letting you down again. I haven't lost faith in you. I know you'll look after Ishida throughout this._

And if he didn't...

_I'll knock more than enough sense into you._

"But Ishida-kun must hate us..." Orihime murmured.

_Inoue..._

Truthfully, Chad hadn't worried or dwelt too much on Uryu being ill today because he'd been too busy worrying about Orihime. Because Ichigo was her whole world. And him with someone else...

_Him choosing a boy over you..._

Would be soul destroying.

And yet all she was worried about was Uryu because he'd been crying. And like Chad she knew it was because he was hurting unlike anything ever before.

_But it must be hurting you too Inoue because, as silly as you can be, you know what this means. You and Ichigo would never work. _

And on top of that to have Uryu shout at her...

_Because he knows he's taken something from you. _

Rukia seemed to know what to do better than Chad (because although Chad could comfort Uryu, girls were different, especially because he knew what Orihime's problem was and that there was nothing he could do). Rukia smiled as she turned to Orihime sitting beside her and clutched her hands. It was the kind of reassuring smile that Ichigo would give someone. "Inoue, don't worry. We'll have them back to normal soon. And you know, Ishida isn't himself right now. Him being upset and saying those things to you... he won't have meant any of them."

_Actually I think he did._

Those were the things that Uryu had been keeping locked up for a long time. Everybody had their dark thoughts, but most people could control them.

Though at the moment, Uryu would not be in control of any part of himself.

_Because he's drowning in something he's not used to. _

Orihime smiled. "I know. And it's fine. This makes things easier for us, doesn't it? We know that Kurosaki-kun won't bite anyone else, and him and Ishida-kun will take good care of each other until they can be cured."

Chad watched her carefully. Orihime was similar to Uryu in a weird way. Uryu didn't let people know what he was thinking. And neither did Orihime. If she was sad, she tried to smile. If she was worried, she tried to laugh. She never wanted anybody to know that anything was wrong.

She just wasn't nearly as good at it as Uryu.

But actually she seemed... OK. Shocked, definitely. But not distressed. A smile with no sign of a quiver or tears.

_Because she knows that Ishida was close to the mark._ _But it's OK because it's something she'd already recognised and come to terms with herself a long time ago._

And Chad knew because she'd turned up at his apartment one day with some bean paste to share. Though all the time she'd been telling him about the paste her fingers had been entwining about one another in an endless knot until the words had come out amid a nervous smile.

_"Sado-kun, can I talk to you about something? Something happened in Hueco Mundo and I can't seem to talk to Kurosaki-kun or Ishida-kun, even though I know I should be talking to Ishida-kun. Will you listen? I think I'm a terrible person."_

She wasn't a terrible person at all. And Chad knew that Uryu wouldn't think she was.

"They looked cute together," Orihime murmured, her voice so quiet that Chad wasn't sure he'd heard it (and actually he wasn't sure he wanted to hear it since there was an odd, red flush to Orihime's cheeks that suggested she was enjoying a little picture in her mind that Chad really, really didn't want to contemplate).

_Maybe it's fortunate that it was Ishida Ichigo chose and not a girl._

And that was a _really _weird thought too.

"How do you think Ishida-kun was bitten?" said Orihime. "Maybe he... he offered himself to Kurosaki-kun as a sacrifice so that no one else had to be a victim. Yes! I bet that's what happened!"

That image in Chad's head again...

Beside him, Rukia was spluttering into her tea. Her cheeks had turned as red as Orihime's.

_Girls._

They read far too much of _that_ kind of manga.

"Um... well..." Urahara scratched his head a little. He didn't seem to know where to look as Rukia and Orihime stared at each other with wide, wide eyes.

"Urahara-san, we need to know more about vampires," said Chad, quickly changing the subject. "No, we need to know everything. You originally said that vampires depend on a partner for their blood supply. Is this an absolute fact? Do we know with absolute certainty that Ichigo and Ishida won't target others?"

"Vampires are rare. I'm not sure we can say anything with absolute certainty."

"But it is unlikely," said Rukia. "I've studied records of vampires - what little we have in Soul Society anyway. The only dreadful incident recorded was when a serial killer became a vampire. He used his new abilities to kill more people. I've never read anything else. Vampires tend to keep to themselves."

"But what if they want children?" Orihime said softly. "Kurosaki-kun has always been really good with children."

"I don't think that'll be the case for a while," said Rukia. "They're in their honeymoon period afterall."

Orihime's face was bright red again. "Honeymoon... Kurosaki-kun and Ishida-kun on-"

"We need to know how much they've changed," said Chad.

Especially Uryu. Ichigo was not acting like himself, but at the same time he wasn't far from his normal character. But Uryu... the things he said. The way he acted. It wasn't like him at all.

Chad wasn't afraid to admit that Hollows fazed him. Everything about this new spirit world fazed him. And he panicked. He tried to stay calm, like Ichigo and Uryu, but sometimes he would find himself standing there. Unable to do anything but watch because his body wouldn't move.

Uryu never panicked (unless Ichigo was involved). But that quiet calmness was a facade. Chad saw the way his fingers tensed at times. And the way he'd crush a can from the vending machine in his hand without seeming to be aware of his actions. Uryu was an angrier person than he let on.

"Urahara-san, you said that partner vampires rely on each other emotionally. What does that mean?" asked Chad.

"They are highly emotional creatures. They need someone to lean on as it were. Someone to receive their emotions and to return them."

"Ichigo picked the worst person."

"Why?"

"Because out of all us, Ishida is the most complicated. And complicated things are often fragile."

It wasn't that Uryu didn't have emotions. He was just very good at hiding them, to the point that he probably wasn't even aware of them himself.

_What happens when someone like that becomes a vampire?_

"I blame myself for this," Urahara muttered. "I failed to take into account that Kurosaki-san was a teenage boy with complex desires that I have long since forgotten about. I will go to Soul Society myself and work with Squad Twelve on a cure." Urahara's pale eyes met Chad's for a moment.

_Urahara, we both know that this could do a lot of damage to Ishida. _

"They did look happy... didn't they?" said Orihime suddenly. "Kurosaki-kun put his arm around Ishida-kun and looked at him... I think Kurosaki-kun must have been very worried about Ishida-kun coming here by himself. And Ishida-kun, I did notice there was something different when he arrived. Ishida-kun is so calm and quiet. And sometimes I don't even notice he's there. When he arrived here, he looked so... alive. I think they're really happy together. And I think Kurosaki-kun is the happiest he's ever been."

Orihime was so like Ichigo. Chad had always thought (and hoped) they'd make a good couple.

And just like Ichigo she could surprise him. Orihime. Sometimes so daft that Chad wanted to bang his head against a wall (and only avoided it because there was something very sweet about it too). And yet oddly intuitive at others. And surprisingly mature.

_And this is exactly why me you, Ichigo and Ishida are such good friends._

And even if things hadn't worked out with Ichigo, there had been Uryu. Uryu could be as daft as Orihime. And Chad had noticed Uryu's eyes lingering on her more than once. And yet Uryu would have given his blessing a million times to Ichigo and Orihime (and Chad knew that for certain since he'd talked about it with Uryu).

Ichigo and Orihime. Or Orihime and Uryu.

Chad had expected one of those outcomes. Not Ichigo and Uryu.

But Orihime was right. There had been a different light in Ichigo's eyes when he'd looked at Ishida. Something Chad had never seen before and yet it didn't seem unnatural in the slightest.

Ichigo and Uryu worried about each other. Indeed, the only time you saw Uryu worried was when he was worrying about Ichigo. And the only time you truly saw his anger was when he was angry at Ichigo.

And Ichigo was always talking about Uryu.

_"What the hell is his problem?"_

_"Why does Ishida never look happy?"_

_"Why didn't Ishida come cinema with us?"_

_"How come so many girls at school like Ishida?"_

_"Seriously, what is his problem?"_

Pieces were starting to connect.

_Ichigo... you liked him before all this, didn't you?_

But still...

"It doesn't matter what they feel now," said Chad. "None of it's real. Ichigo didn't ask to be a vampire. And I bet Ishida didn't either."

"I know," Orihime murmured sadly. "For Ishida-kun's sake, we have to make sure we find a cure for them."

And Chad was concerned. Ichigo could deal with stressful situations. So could Uryu. But could Uryu deal with emotions?

_Emotions can break the strongest of people._

And if you weren't used to them, you'd have no idea how painful they could be.


	9. Chapter 9

**I promised nice things for Uryu and Ichigo, didn't I? I lied. Actually, I think what is more likely to happen is what happens in this chapter... since Uryu is still complicated Uryu.**

**But there will also be nice things! This chapter was getting too long so I split it again, which means you get a double update. And I hope that the second chapter will be a good one that will keep the vampire fans among you happy :D I've been getting so many lovely reviews so as thanks I'll try my hardest to get the next part done for later today.**

**And by the way, a belated Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to everyone!**

* * *

"They're not following," said Ichigo.

The rain lashed Ichigo's face as he used shunpo to bound through the night air with Uryu held tightly against his chest. Rain wasn't a problem when he was in Shinigami form. Yes, he still felt the dampness against his skin but it didn't seem to soak into his robes and weigh him down. He still felt the cold bite of the air too, but it couldn't hurt him in this form so there was no need to let it bother him. In fact, it was rare he even noticed what the weather was like when he was a Shinigami.

But Uryu could feel it. He was missing the coat and scarf he'd been wearing when he left the apartment and his white trousers and hooded sweater were saturated with rainwater. Ichigo could feel him trying not to shiver. And even though Uryu always tried to hide it, Ichigo knew he felt the cold a lot (and his suspicion seemed to have been justified by the fact that Uryu had about five extra blankets on his futon in addition to the duvet).

"Just hang on, Ishida. I'll find us somewhere." Ichigo glanced down, but between Uryu's raven wet hair and his cheek being pressed against Ichigo's chest, he couldn't see any part of his face. But he could hear his breathing. Unsettled. Ragged. Painful. And the occasional muffled choke.

_You're crying._

Rain blurring tears. And it made Ichigo want to cry too. Which was weird because he wasn't the type to cry. And he wasn't sure why he would want to cry right now. They had both escaped. Nobody was following them. And nothing had changed.

_So why do I feel so sick?_

He glanced behind him once more, closing his eyes briefly as he concentrated on the reiatsu of Rukia and the others at the Urahara Shop to satisfy himself that they definitely weren't in pursuit. It was useful being able to sense people like this. Now he knew why Uryu and Rukia had always nagged him for not being able to. Before this he'd been fighting blind.

_And relying on pure luck. _

Slowly Ichigo descended from the air, dropping down into the wooded park on the edge of town by the fox shrine. Now what? Uryu's apartment and Ichigo's house were both known to the others, and it didn't seem as if Uryu was in the right frame of mind to think up other options for them.

_Think, think, think! I have to come up with something._

One of the bridges by the river? Bridges made good shelter.

_But they're not exactly the safest place at this time of night._

Though that wasn't a problem since Ichigo could lamp anyone who tried to cause trouble.

_But that's wrong! I have to come up with something better than a bridge!_

Uryu needed him to think of something better for them than a cold bridge that stank of damp stone and urine.

A little voice inside him laughed. _You've always been an idiot at these kind of things. And you wonder why Ishida never relies on you?_

Ichigo brushed a hand lightly against Uryu's face, wiping the water from his skin. Carefully he carried him into the darker, thicker part of the trees where there was at least some kind of skeletal canopy to protect them from the worst of the winter-like autumnal storm. Again he glanced down at Uryu and tried to smile, even though he didn't feel like smiling. "They're not following," he repeated. "See? They're not looking for a fight. I think you just surprised them a little."

Silence amid the falling rain. Uryu motionless apart from the occasional quiver that the cold teased from him.

Gently Ichigo pressed his hand against Uryu's head, sweeping the wet hair from his face. Uryu's blue eyes were glassy and unfocused. The sick feeling in Ichigo's stomach tensed because he knew that look. Isshin had spoken about it on many occasions.

_Sometimes there is a look in a person's eyes that shows they are about to break. It's common after an accident or tragedy, and you see a lot of it as a doctor. If you let them break too much then they'll never go back together again._

Leaning his back against a tree, Ichigo bit his lip hard to stop some awful noise from coming from his throat. He hugged Uryu fiercely as he swallowed. "It's not true," he said softly. "What you said back there."

_"Friends? You're only 'friends' with me because of Kurosaki! He's the one you all care about the most!"_

"Yes it is," Uryu mumbled.

"No it's not. They'd go to the end of the world for you. Just as you would for them."

"Kurosaki, you are an idiot. Just like Sado-kun. Believing in the best of people and the ideal world where everyone can be saved. It's not true. We protect those we care about the most. There are always some we care about more than others. They are friends with me because they are friends with you."

"There is an ideal world. And it has the four of us in it."

Uryu tilted his head. His hair fell back into place across his face, hiding every expression from Ichigo's view again. "You're an idiot."

It was a mild insult compared with some of the nasty comments Uryu could make (and did frequently), but he still made every word drip with contempt. And it made Ichigo feel pathetic, particularly as the best he could do to even protect Uryu from something like the rain were a bunch of balding autumn trees with branches that swung wildly in the rain.

And again there was silence between them.

Ichigo leaned a little heavier against the tree. He'd seen something rare earlier; happy Uryu. But of course he should have expected something like this.

_Because you are still you._

And although Ichigo wouldn't have it any way, because he'd secretly feared that he'd turned Uryu into someone else after biting him, it still hurt to be battered by the silence. And the realisation that maybe Uryu and emotions weren't compatible.

_Or that they're too broken to be retrieved. _That little voice inside of Ichigo again that he didn't want to hear, because Ichigo liked to believe that people could be saved.

"They panicked, Ishida. They weren't intending to hurt you. They just wanted to restrain you and I bet they feel awful right now. We're still friends. The four of us will always be friends because we see things that others don't."

_Though you've seen things like Hollows for so much longer than the rest of us, haven't you Ishida?_

Ichigo took a deep breath. "But we're something they've never dealt with before. Remember how you panicked when I became a vampire?"

Silence.

"Oi, Ishida, say something."

Rain falling through the canopy, tossing up the scent of rotting leaves from the ground. Uryu saying nothing. His breathing had quietened until it was almost as if Ichigo was holding no one at all in his arms.

"Good god you're hard work," Ichigo muttered.

"Then leave." Fierce contempt spat into every word.

Ichigo slid down the tree until he was seated on the damp ground with Uryu still cradled to his chest. "No."

I_'m sorry I bit you. _

"Ishida..."

_And I'm sorry I'm selfish enough to want to stop the others from sending you back to how you were before this._

Ichigo tried to hold Uryu even closer, but Uryu's arms were moving, forcibly untangling himself from Ichigo's lap.

"Let go, Kurosaki."

"No."

_"Put me down!"_ Uryu thumped his fist hard against Ichigo's chest. Shoving Ichigo's arms away, Uryu stood. He turned his back to Ichigo and stood staring up at the branches, not even flinching as the rain hit his face.

And there was an empty panic in Ichigo's chest.

_Because I can't live without you._

And somehow, the sight of Uryu standing alone in the dark rain like that suited him. As if it was meant to be like that. And it was terrifying because Ichigo didn't want him to be alone looking so cold, or looking as if he belonged alone.

Ichigo stood, but as soon as he started forward Uryu glared at him over his shoulder. Icy, red rimmed eyes that seemed to sap the strength inside Ichigo's chest. Ichigo faltered as Uryu stepped away. The wet foliage squelched underfoot as Uryu placed several clear metres between them. If he hadn't been wearing white he might have dissolved away completely in the damp darkness.

_This is that frightening side of you that doesn't want anyone to get close._

And it made Ichigo quiver because any second it felt as if Uryu would walk away into the trees. "Ishida, don't shut me out." His voice shook with a sound that Ichigo wasn't used to. He dug his fingers into the palms of his hands as his fists curled. _"You always do this!_ Do you think I don't know when you're upset? Do you think Inoue and Chad don't notice? We know when you're having a bad day! I _know_ when you need someone to rely on and it hurts because I know that you will never rely on anybody! Why do you do that to yourself? We're always here for you. I'm always here for you. From the day we met, you've been able to rely on me..."

_Only you don't rely on anyone. Even when one of us steps in to protect you from a Hollow, you look surprised. You really, really think we'd let anything happen to you?_

And the fact that he did...

_And the way you're glaring at me now..._

"You're a jerk, Ishida. For thinking so little of all of us." Ichigo took a deep breath. _Don't shout. Even though I want to shake you so hard to knock some sense into you._

But Uryu really did piss him off. Pushing people away. Knowing _exactly_ how to push people away.

_And you're not the only one who was hurt tonight. What about me? Letting you walk into danger. Seeing my friends turn on you. Seeing you cry._

And Uryu being so_ fucking_ difficult.

_But you've wound me up so many times these past two years. I know you. And I'm through with letting you get away with this behaviour. Letting you be alone just because it's easier for all of us rather than trying to unravel that complicated nature of yours. _

Ichigo smiled. "But it's OK, Ishida. I understand how you're feeling right now. And I know you hate me for seeing you like this."

_You're vulnerable. And the only way you know how to react is to isolate yourself so that no one else can hurt you anymore than you're already hurting. _

Uryu froze for a moment at the unexpected softness. "You think you know me, Kurosaki? No, you know the quiet Ishida Uryu. Always good in class and always turns in his homework on time. Concerns himself with nothing but studying and cute little sewing projects. A pathetic little bookworm that hides from society."

"That's not you really though, is it? I told you. Do you think I don't notice when you're upset? Do you think I don't notice your fingers clenching so hard when you're angry that your knuckles turn white? Do you think I don't see through all your stuck up, high and mighty Quincy talk? You're protecting yourself from us. Afraid to admit we're friends because you expect it to fail and you're cushioning yourself for that moment. You don't study all the time. You worry and fret about what will happen when everything breaks apart. You use studying as a way to distract yourself from the things you fear the most. Losing all of us. Whether through a Hollow or just a natural drift in life. Ishida, you don't need to worry. It's not going to break."

Uryu's glare tightening. In the darkness, Ichigo couldn't see it properly, but he could feel the malice; Uryu hating him for seeing through him. And of course there was another defensive reaction that Ichigo had expected.

"Don't pretend that you know me, Kurosaki! You didn't even realise I existed until I introduced myself! We were in the same class for weeks and you _never noticed me!"_

"That doesn't matter because it's the past. We know each other now. I know there are things about you I will never understand, Ishida. And things about yourself that you don't want anybody to understand. Sometimes you want to be alone. And sometimes that's OK because someone like you needs to be alone every now and then. But at other times it's absolutely not OK to be alone."

"You're so annoying. Your ridiculous speeches. Your ridiculous way of grabbing hold of people and forcing them to see your world. Your perfect little world with a warm home, a father who gives you _everything_ and friends. It's sickening."

_You're baiting me because attack is another form of defence. I know that._

And Ichigo felt calmly intelligent at being able to predict and understand Uryu's response for once.

But god Uryu knew exactly how to hurt. Even in the calmness, Ichigo could feel that his fingers had drawn blood in the palms of his hands. But he wasn't going to shout because Uryu wanted an argument. And it was time all of that stopped.

"Perfect?" Ichigo said softly. "What's perfect about it, Ishida? My mother died because of me. My father hides a million things from me and I'm too much of a coward to ask him the truth because I know there will be things that I don't want to hear."

"At least you knew your mother! And at least your father is a father!" Uryu screamed. "And the only reason I have anything is because you were _stupid_ enough to get that idiotic bleached head of yours brainwashed by a vampire! And somehow we've ended up together. And I know that I am the last person on earth you would want to be with! _That anyone would ever want to be with!"_

"That's not true. I've told you about you, so now let me tell you about me. And let's see if you knew any of it. I wanted to be you. You with your perfect grades and your ability to stand on your own two feet without a family. But that's not all. I wanted you. I stared at you. I didn't know why at the time. And you'd irritate me so much that I'd be thinking about you all evening. Ishida, this way I am now; the way I feel about you... I was always like this. I just never realised until I was bitten. And do you have any idea how much it hurts? Loving you more than anything and having you glare at me like I'm the worst person on the planet? And seeing you crying and hurting like this and not letting me do anything?"

Ichigo had to concentrate hard to keep his voice level. There was an uncomfortable lump budding in his throat and his face felt wet in a way that the rain could never achieve.

"I hate you," Uryu muttered. His face creased in an awful way. Silently Ichigo begged for him not to cry again. Because Uryu had cried enough tonight and that look on his face was made all the more worse because it wasn't a typical look for Uryu. "Kurosaki..." Uryu sobbed.

_You don't even know what world you want to see, do you Ishida? Because you've seen Hollows and pain for so long that you think it's impossible to see anything else._

Or maybe he was just angry that things didn't change sooner. And it was Ichigo's fault because Uryu was right; Ichigo hadn't noticed he existed until Uryu had taunted him that one night.

_And I'm so glad you did that. I just wish we could have met earlier. Then you wouldn't have been alone for so along._

Ichigo moved forward and hugged Uryu. Because if he didn't then he knew Uryu never would. Because that's the kind of person Uryu was.

_But as long as I understand that then I'll be able to drag you out of this dark place rather than fall down with you._

Uryu fell against him, crying so hard he was almost screaming.

"Shhhh, it's OK." Ichigo wrapped one arm around Uryu's waist and pressed the other against his damp head. "It's OK, Uryu."

"Don't call me-"

"It's all right. It doesn't matter if you don't want to be on first-name terms. We can work on that. But sometimes, just let me say your name, even if you never want to say mine." Ichigo rested his head on top of Uryu's. "And it's OK if you don't want to open up to me completely. Just a little is more than enough."

"Kurosaki..." Uryu's mouth opened and closed. Words replaced by sobs and laboured breaths because that's all he could manage. Uryu couldn't apologise for something like this. It just wasn't in his nature. But Ichigo knew that's who Uryu was so it was fine.

"Ishida, it's fine. I know the suddenness of this is difficult for you. It's weird isn't it? Us two who never showed any interest in romantic relationships being thrown together?"

_And you who barely showed any emotion at all suddenly being overrun by the passion of a vampire that you don't know how to control. _

"We'll work through it together. When you need to yell at me you can because I know you can get angry sometimes and shouting at me is probably better than smashing all the mugs in your apartment." Ichigo kissed the top of his head as he managed a smile. "I saw all the broken things in your apartment earlier. Sheesh, we may need to get you into anger management. I don't mind if you need to shout at me. But please, just hug me afterwards."

Ichigo knew he was babbling, to reassure himself as well as Uryu, as he brushed his hands against Uryu's wet hair. It seemed to be working. Uryu was crying more quietly and his hands had wrapped tightly about Ichigo's back.

_So now I just need to get him somewhere warm. Preferably where there's hot chocolate._

"Ichigo."

Ichigo froze at the sound of the familiar voice. Uryu's quiet sniffles silenced completely. Peering closely at Uryu's face in the darkness, Ichigo could see his eyes. Wide. Petrified. He felt Uryu's hands frantically clutching at his robes.

"Ichigo, it's all right. You don't need to go to red alert," said the voice. "I have a torch here. It's reassuring to see faces rather than be strangers in the dark, don't you think?"

A click of a switch. A beam of light falling on the leafy ground at Ichigo and Uryu's feet. Slowly Ichigo turned his head to face his father. "Dad."

Isshin stood several feet away, holding a large blue umbrella up against the rain. In his other hand he held the torch and there was a second umbrella folded under his arm, which he held out towards Ichigo. "Here."

Ichigo stared at the tip of the umbrella, and then at Uryu's glassy eyes. And a million scenarios squished into his mind all at once. _If we run, where do we go? Leave Karakura Town? Go north to somewhere empty like Hokkaido? But they'll follow us. And how would we survive alone? And dad could maybe stop us here. Or maybe he'll understand. Or maybe I can fight him..._

And he almost gasped at the thought. _Fight my own family...?_

He was trembling. Even though he shouldn't feel the cold, he was suddenly frozen. And he had a feeling that this unnatural, confused panic with no way out was how Uryu had felt moments before.

"Don't run away," said Isshin quickly. "Urahara has told me everything. If I try to say or do anything against you, you'll run away won't you? I don't want you to run away, Ichigo. I would rather have you as a vampire and know that you are safe - that both of you are safe - than any other alternative. Unless you want to stay out in the rain?"

Ichigo glanced at Uryu. His teeth were clenched as he tried not to shiver. Their eyes met; Uryu's still full of wild panic as he shook his head.

"I know it's hard for you both to trust anyone at the moment. Ichigo, it's OK. I'm sure there are much worse things you could bring home than a boyfriend. And maybe his good grades will rub off on you." Isshin laughed. The warm, familiar laugh that always rumbled through Ichigo's family home. "Ichigo, our home is not a battlefield. I would never let that happen. And because I am a coward who fears losing you, I am not getting involved in this matter. I've told Urahara that our house is a no-go area. It's a safe place for you. And Uryu too. Come home."

Isshin beamed. That idiot smile that was the same as always.

But maybe not quite the same this time. There was a tentativeness to it that Ichigo wasn't used to seeing. A slight element of fear.

"Ichigo, don't run away. Don't do anything rash."

And just as it was painful to see Uryu distraught, it was painful to see his confident dad teetering on the edge of nervousness. It wasn't often he was spoke seriously or personally. And Ichigo was so used to him goofing around that sometimes he forgot this side of him existed.

Even though it had never failed to materialise when he needed it.

Isshin couldn't be trusted. There were many deep secrets Ichigo knew he was hiding. But despite all of that...

_I know you've only ever wanted to protect me and Yuzu and Karin._

And Ichigo let those secrets lie because there would be a good reason for Isshin not to have explained them.

_And in that way I trust you completely. _

Actually, Ichigo felt ashamed (and even a little terrified) that he had panicked when he'd first heard his voice. Because of course his dad was his dad, and he didn't say things unless he meant them. And right now his dad was genuinely worried; a rare emotion for him to show.

Ichigo took a deep breath as he hugged Uryu. Being a vampire was hard. Yes, there were new colours and sensations, but he'd never felt this nervous and unstable before. There was no reason to even think of attacking his dad or any of his friends. All of this was a misunderstanding made worse by his own new vibrant emotions.

No wonder Uryu was a mess.

_And it's my fault because I turned you into this._

Ichigo pressed his head against Uryu's. He could feel the vibrations in his body as Uryu's teeth chattered. "It's all right," Ichigo murmured. "We can trust him."

Uryu shook his head. "No..."

"Ishida, think for a moment. You're being paranoid and you know that's not rational for you. Vampires seem more nervous than humans and we have to get used to that. We can trust him. The whole world isn't against us. People have just panicked. You'll see. We'll talk to the others tomorrow and it will be fine."

"Uryu," said Isshin gently, "do you remember what I said to you the first time you came to our house?"

Uryu paused for a moment. Ichigo felt as if an enormous weight was starting to lift from his shoulders as he saw that terrible look in Uryu's eyes soften slightly with a small nod.

Isshin grinned. "Good. Now let's get you both back into the warmth before you make yourselves sick."

* * *

**More to come very, very soon...**

**On another note, I went to London just before Christmas. There were some delays so I was on a train for ages and I wrote another Ishi/Ichi story. It's not as detailed or as long as Autumn Moon. I'll type it up some time though because it was kinda cute to write. It's going to be called Another Life.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Second update of the day. Enjoy!**

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Uryu had hated Ichigo's house the first time he visited. Bright and clean, but full of the clutter of family life with battered shoes, a noisy television, and school bags and magazines strewn everywhere.

_Even when I lived with Ryuken we didn't have a house like this._

_"Uryu, your room is for your things. Don't leave them around the house."_

An enormous house where your voice echoed across the walls if you dared to speak. Not that there had ever been anyone to speak to most of the time.

But in Ichigo's house; happy faces. _"Welcome home."_

And strangely this warm, happy place hadn't rejected him.

_"Uryu!?" Isshin had almost fallen off the sofa when Uryu followed Ichigo into the living room._

_Ichigo frowned. "Eh? How do you know his name?"_

_"Eh? Ah, you told me."_

_"No I didn't."_

_"Of course you did, stupid son! How else would I know?"_

_"I swear I've never mentioned him. I only met him the other day!"_

_"Uryu, I've heard so much about you!" Isshin grinned as he grabbed both of Uryu's hands in his, almost crushing them in the process. "Treat this house as a home away from home! Let me know if you ever need anything. Anything at all!"_

_What a weird family..._

_"Um, thanks." Uryu tried not to flinch, even though that grinning face was far too close for comfort. He also wasn't used to being called by that name anymore._

_Actually, he wasn't used to being spoken to at all. _

_Or used to having someone be nice to him. _

_This is such a weird family, but Kurosaki is so lucky,_ Uryu thought as he sunk to his ears in the bathtub. They had a bath in this house. With hot water. Not the lukewarm splatter in Uryu's shower, but water that steamed enough to turn his skin red.

He hadn't wanted to go with Isshin, but now he was here he felt safe. Indeed, this house had always felt safe and warm. Ichigo had reiterated that too when they arrived, dripping wet. "_Leave it to me, Ishida. I know my family. If dad was planning anything he'd have thumped me in the woods. And if, IF, anything does happen then I promise I'll get us both away from here. I promise, I won't let anyone change us back."_

And the heat made everything feel better as it washed away the memory of the rain and the feeling of being helpless and alone. Uryu tilted his head back and closed his eyes as the steam brushed over his face.

_I don't know what came over me earlier._

His eyes still ached, as if he'd been scraping them with a scrubbing brush. To think he'd cried that much... to think he'd cried _at all._

_How humiliating..._

It had been bad enough the first time he'd cried in front of Ichigo after that battle with the Menos Grande shortly after they'd first met. But at least there had been a genuine reason (because if there was any reason to cry it was because Sensei was no longer a part of the world of the living). And even all these years later Uryu still felt the painful rip inside of him amid the bleeding memory of blood and entrails humans shouldn't see hitting autumn leaves and dangling from Hollow mouths.

But Ichigo was right about earlier (shocking. Ichigo was actually right about something!). Uryu had been filled with paranoia. Looking back, Uryu wasn't even sure why everything had seemed so terrible at the time. Of course the others had leapt into action because that's the kind of people they were. And he would have done the same. He winced as he remembered yelling at Orihime. He couldn't remember exactly what he'd said. A lot of the evening's events had blurred in his memory and he didn't want to look at them too hard because he knew he'd said some terrible things.

But as soon as he started to think like that he found himself backtracking. _It's not my fault. Of course I panicked. How else was I supposed to react? _

That didn't sound like him. A vampire's thoughts?

He sighed as he sat up and pulled his knees to his chest. He needed to learn the difference between what was human and what was vampire. Fortunately, Ichigo had had the sense to see through a vampire's tinted perception earlier, otherwise god only knows what would have happened to them or where they would have ended up going. Uryu smiled. To think that blockhead would be the one to see the sensible option...

But again Uryu winced. Because he was smiling at the thought of Ichigo, just like Orihime had always smiled when she was obviously thinking of Ichigo. _I can't make up for what I've done to her._

And he couldn't really feel that guilty about it. Maybe vampires couldn't feel guilt in the way a human did.

_Such selfish creatures..._

Uryu held his breath as he lay back and submerged his face beneath the water. He stared at the light refracting over the warm surface of the bath; dozens of different tints and subtle colours that only a vampire could see.

_Such selfish creatures that see the world in a beautiful way. And that feel so happy most of the time. _

He closed his eyes, enjoying the enveloping feeling of warmth.

_But, Uryu, you need to be careful,_ he told himself. _Because vampires are clearly very irrational and it would be embarrassing to let Kurosaki be the smart, sensible one in this relationship._

He opened his eyes. Or would it? What was wrong with it?

He sat up quickly from the water as he let out his breath. He swept his hair back from his face. _I like being like this, even if vampires have their odd paranoid moments. What's wrong with enjoying it?_

Because before this...

_I don't think I even knew what it was to be happy._

So maybe it was OK to fall into this feeling. And leave guilt behind.

"Ishida." Ichigo's voice and a knock on the door. "I've just fetched my body. Dad says he'll wash and dry your clothes. I've got some of my stuff you can wear in the meantime."

Uryu smiled. If they'd been face to face, he would have tried hard to frown and look serious. He wasn't sure why, but it seemed more fun to argue with Ichigo sometimes. Ichigo pulled funny faces when he was annoyed. "Your clothes are weird."

"They're not! And look who's talking? You look like a weird cosplayer when you wear your Quincy outfits in public! It's about time you had some decent clothes!"

"It's all right, Kurosaki. Now we're stuck together I'll educate you on fashion sense. I'll make some nice things for you."

"Don't you dare! I wouldn't be caught dead in anything you made!"

"Then I'll pin you down and stuff you in it." Uryu grinned, imagining the look on Ichigo's face.

"Huh. We'll see who pins who down. I'll leave your new stylish clothes here. Complain anymore and you can wear one of dad's old shirts."

"Whatever."

There was a pause for a moment. "Ishida, are you feeling better now?"

"Yes. Just a shame your bathtub isn't bigger."

He could feel Ichigo's grin on the other side of the door. "You're skinny. I could probably squeeze in there with you when we have an empty house some time."

"I wasn't thinking of you. I just wanted a bigger bath."

"That's harsh, Ishida. I've done nothing but think of you soaking naked in there since you got in that bath."

Uryu gave a small smile as his face reddened. Ichigo was far too good at saying things like this. Uryu could think of some funny (and slightly rude) comments to say back to him, but saying such things out loud seemed much more difficult.

_I'd have thought vampires were good at saying what they think since they seem to get carried away so easily._

Maybe it would come. And then Uryu would be able to tell Ichigo that what he wanted more than anything was to drag him into this hot water and kiss and bite him all over.

He felt his hand gripping the side of the bath at that thought, his fingers so tense that his bones stood out. Ichigo on top of him in this bath. His neck close. And the taste of blood... Uryu clutched his face with his one hand, and somewhere else with the other.

Vampires need blood.

_Maybe this frustration is partly why I lost it earlier._

Because he'd been thinking about blood a lot since this morning and for the past few hours he'd become aware of a dryness to his throat that water or tea couldn't seem to quench. But the problem was how to ask...

He could accept he needed blood, as disgusting and crude as it seemed, because he was a vampire after all (and it was an urge he definitely couldn't ignore). But Ishida Uryu wasn't the type of person to ask anybody for anything. Especially something intimate like this.

_So how do I ask?_

He closed his eyes as he gave himself once last squeeze. Taking a deep breath, he stood and grabbed a towel. _I've never felt this... weird... before in all my life. _"I-I'll be out in a few moments, Kurosaki."

"All right. Dad saved some leftovers for tea. Yuzu's curry is amazing. There's enough for both of us. I'll chop some salad too. You haven't eaten all day so you must be starving."

"Something like that."

* * *

"Are you feeling better, Uryu? Did you enjoy your bath?" Isshin, sitting at the table, smiled broadly as Uryu entered the living room.

Uryu forced himself to smile back as he rubbed his hair with a towel. "Yes. Thank you."

_Kurosaki, I'm going to kill you._

Or bite him. And then kill him when he'd appeased the vampire's blood lust.

Ichigo was chopping lettuce at the worksurface. His eyes briefly darted in Uryu's direction and Uryu saw his slight grin before he quickly lowered his head.

_I swear I will kill you._

Outside the bathroom, Ichigo had left a white tanktop with the words 'Sexy Sexy!' sprawled across it in gold writing and a pair of garish yellow, green and purple striped shorts that felt as if they might fall down at any second. Ichigo had worn them a lot last summer. He'd looked like some weird tropical frog. And to top everything off, he'd also left him some bright orange socks with English words across them (and you should never trust writing you couldn't read on men's socks because they probably said something utterly disgraceful).

_Bad dress sense must run in the family._

Because Isshin was in similar garish clothes. Yellow and red pyjama bottoms and a blue 'Who's Your Daddy' t-shirt splattered with curry stains. He beamed at Uryu, as he always had whenever he was in the house. But despite the stupid appearance and the warm expression, he wasn't as unthreatening as he seemed.

_You're a Shinigami. And Ichigo says you're strong. And you're clearly very adept at hiding things._

Uryu could see now that his spirit ribbon was red, but he was certain that hadn't been the case on the first few occasions they'd met, which meant he'd lost his powers at some point. Even so, that smile was friendly and father-like and Uryu wanted to trust it because it seemed so like how a real father should smile.

_And how Ryuken never had._

"You look very suspicious, Uryu," said Isshin. "You don't need to worry. I told you, I'm a coward. I can't say or do anything about you two because I don't want you to elope. Not that there's much to say. I actually know a little about vampires. I met a guy called Takko at university. Great pal. We studied together all the time. I got a bit of a shock when I found out he was a vampire. He had a girlfriend partner. They were both great people. And my son Ichigo is a great person. Well, most of the most time anyway. As long as he is still Ichigo, I'm satisfied. Yes, some things will be different, but perhaps you can see through them with some sense. You realise it, don't you Uryu? Vampires can become paranoid and distraught all too easily. And they feel emotions excessively." Isshin tilted his head to look at Ichigo. "Maybe now, Ichigo, you'll come to my arms and we'll bond like father and son-"

Ichigo slammed the lettuce against the chopping board. "Stop saying weird things!"

"It's true! You're a gayboy vampire now! Ha! I'm going to rent a load of tragic tearjerkers and you'll blubber like a girl and I will take photos of your emotional side!"

"Seriously, I'll stab you if you don't shut up." Ichigo waved the salad knife.

"You can't stab me, boy! What if you killed me?" Isshin grinned as he stood. "Ah, this turn of events mean there will be all the more pretty girls for me! Just don't take up sewing. Not that there's anything wrong with a boy sewing of course," he added very, very quickly. "And I'll have something to say if you act too gay. But you can certainly be more affectionate towards your father. Come to my arms, Ichigo! Let's all three sleep in my bed tonight and have a big family hug!"

"That's it, get out!" Ichigo jabbed the knife at Isshin's face. "You're being too weird! _Way, way too weird!"_

Isshin gasped, his face filling with mock terror. He tilted his head back quickly. The blade slid over his head. Ichigo tutted and then used the knife to gesture towards the door. "Out!"

Uryu stared. Those reflexes...

_The reflexes of both of them..._

Uryu wouldn't have been able to duck that quickly if someone had suddenly thrust a knife at his face. The fact that Isshin had, and that this kind of activity seemed normal...

_Kurosaki, how could you not have noticed your dad has some kind of powerful ability?_

It clearly had never occurred to Ichigo that he could actually hurt or even kill his dad with something like this. Because these kind of things were harmless and commonplace in the Kurosaki household.

_Because your father has always been able to move like this so fights turn into a game without you even realising that this same situation in any other house would lead to panic and a call to the police..._

"Ho ho!" Isshin grabbed a carving knife and held it out like a sword. "Ichigo, let's dual!"

_I am not seeing this..._

"Quit it!" Ichigo roared, deflecting the blows from the carving knife with the salad blade.

_Madness..._

"Almost got you there, Ichigo!"

_Utter madness!_

Isshin suddenly held both of his hands up. Ichigo froze breathlessly, the salad knife stopping an inch from Isshin's nose. Isshin laughed. "Good fight, son! But you still tried to kill me. How mean! But it doesn't matter because I don't need you as a son anymore because I have a replacement right here!" He was suddenly standing beside Uryu and before Uryu could shuffle away, a ferocious arm had clamped about his shoulders so tightly that it almost knocked him over. "The joys of a second son. A second chance if the first one fails in life! And I hear he has better grades than you."

_Help..._

"Put him down right now!" Ichigo roared.

Uryu stared between them. Actions in this case were usually simple. Anyone who touched him like this had their arm twisted until the person screamed. Or sometimes a glare was just as effective.

But an arm this strong...

_And such blatant lack of respect when we're barely more than strangers..._

Uryu had no idea how to react. Especially when Isshin was grinning at him. Almost as if he'd raised Uryu himself.

And for a weird, weird moment Uryu vaguely contemplated how he would have turned out being raised by this lunatic. And whether Ryuken was secretly a godsend or not.

Isshin, looking pleased as punch, patted Uryu fondly on the shoulder. "Oh, I have something to tell you both before I have a bath and go to bed. Karin and Yuzu are already asleep, but before I went out looking for you, I told them about you two. That you were a couple rather than the vampire bit because I think we should keep that to ourselves."

Ichigo tensed. "How did they take it?"

"Karin didn't care. Said she already knew you had the hots for Uryu."

"EH?!" said Ichigo and Uryu at once.

"And Yuzu is just happy that she'll never be replaced by a girlfriend. Don't you have a wonderful, understanding family?" Isshin's arm squeezed Uryu harder until Uryu felt the breath leave his throat.

_He's going to crush me._

But it was definitely better to wait it out and do nothing.

_Because any action might just encourage him._

But finally it was over. Uryu was left rubbing his shoulders as Isshin moved close to Ichigo. He lowered his voice, but Uryu could still make out his words. "But, Ichigo, if my sweet, innocent girls _hear_ or _see anything_ they shouldn't then I'll tear your balls off with my bare hands. Understand?"

"Yeah, yeah, I wouldn't do that to them so don't worry." Ichigo resumed decimating the lettuce. "You do know about Yuzu's stash of yaoi though don't you?"

Isshin gasped in horror. "Don't mention it! It's a lie! It doesn't exist! _It doesn't!"_ He ran from the living room, arms and legs sprawling in every direction in a mock cartoon run, but then suddenly he popped his head around the edge of the doorway. "Nighty night Uryu! I've set the spare bed up in Ichigo's room for you!"

"Ah, um. Thank you."

And he was gone. Uryu and Ichigo were both quiet as they listened to the footsteps bound up the stairs and then creak along the landing to the bathroom.

"I think I'm already asleep. Something this weird cannot be real," Uryu muttered. "Your family is insane! Not just crazy. Actually insane!"

"How do you think I feel having to live with him? Ignore him. He's weird and I apologise." Ichigo looked a bit red as began fluffing the rice in the rice cooker. Uryu tilted his head. Ichigo looked funny with his bleached hair and scarlet cheeks. He was embarrassed because of his family?

_Ah, this will be why your father continues to bait you._

Because it was funny.

"Now I know why you turned out so noisy." Uryu smiled as he pulled a chair back and sat at the table. The chopsticks had been set out ready and he picked them up and turned them over in his hands. "But you're lucky you know."

Ichigo paused for a second. "Yeah, I know. He always joked that he'd still love me if I was a gay. I always thought he was just being an idiot... but maybe he kinda saw this coming."

"You becoming a vampire?"

"No... just... well, I explained it earlier. I think I might have always... anyway, here's your curry. Enjoy." Ichigo placed a plate of rice, curry, salad and pickles in front of Uryu.

"I don't remember Ryuken ever smiling at me," Uryu said softly. "Or playing a game with me..."

"You think that was a game? Do you have any ideas how many times he's punched and kicked me and almost stabbed me as he tries to 'make me stronger'?"

"It's a game that you can both play because you're both brutes." Uryu focused his eyes on his hands, carefully turning the chopsticks over and over with his fingers. He had a feeling Ichigo was staring and it made him feel odd because he wasn't even sure why he was bringing up Ryuken anyway when he avoided speaking about him with anyone. Because people were usually curious and nosy enough to ask questions that Uryu didn't want to answer.

_Kurosaki, Sado-kun and Inoue-san are some of the few people who have never asked anything about Ryuken though._

And Uryu had always been grateful for that.

Something soft against Uryu's cheek. A clumsy kiss from Ichigo. Uryu looked up in surprise, his face warming, particularly when he saw the colour of Ichigo's cheeks. Ichigo didn't seem to know what to say as he started dishing rice up onto his plate. But he didn't need to say anything because the little kiss was enough.

Uryu smiled as he looked down at the steaming plate in front of him. The warm smell pulled at his stomach because he hadn't eaten properly in over twenty four hours. Even when he did eat, it was never a complete meal like this. He knew how to cook (and was good at it) but instant noodles were cheap and Uryu was poor.

_Kurosaki, you really are lucky._

Ichigo plonked the second plate on the table, sat and started eating. Uryu rolled his eyes as he watched him shovelling with the chopsticks. He'd have to teach him some proper table manne-

A thin line of suddenly blood rolled down the index finger of Ichigo's right hand.

Uryu stared. Watching as the red bead dropped into the rice, disappearing amid the fluffy white.

"Huh? What's wrong? You don't like it? Ah, I forgot you're a fussy eater."

And normally Uryu would _never_ have let that fussy comment slip but there was something more important to focus on.

"Your finger..."

Uryu watched the crimson bleed as it gradually stained the contours of Ichigo's index finger.

"Eh? Oh, blood. I didn't see. Guess I must have caught it when chopping the-"

Uryu grabbed Ichigo's hand and pressed the finger to his mouth. Kissed it. Licked it. Tentatively sucked.

_Oh god this tastes-_

He gulped hard at the tiny drops.

"Ishida...?"

Uryu heard himself moaning, his heart beating faster as the sweet flavour teased his mouth. But as soon as he realised the noises he was making, he was embarrassed, especially as he could feel Ichigo staring at him with a slightly gaping mouth. Quickly Uryu let go, even though he didn't want to. He stared at the table, his face burning as he pressed his fingers to his mouth to try and hide whatever idiotic expression must be on his lips. He tried to say sorry but couldn't seem to manage it.

Ichigo stared at his finger. "Or something like that, huh?"

Uryu turned his head away from Ichigo, still covering his lips with his hand as he licked the inside of his mouth for any remains of the crimson taste. Sweet... so sweet that it made his fingers tremble. He took a long, slow deep breath.

_Don't lose control. Ishida Uryu is not the type to lose control to something like this._

Another deep breath. Slowly he moved his hand from his mouth and then picked up his chopsticks instead. He looked at the curry, which was suddenly the last thing in the world he wanted. His eyes flicked to Ichigo's plate where he knew that globule of blood was nestled among the rice.

Ichigo placed his hand on Uryu's and then took the chopsticks from him. He leaned close. "You should have said sooner. Come on."

Ichigo clasped his hand, slotting his fingers through Uryu's and gently pulling him out of the chair and to the door. And even though Uryu didn't have a clue whether he was capable of going through with this, he still found himself letting Ichigo guide him quietly up the stairs, past the bathroom where Isshin was singing YMCA in the bath.

With the initial bite from Ichigo had come a barrage of desires and urges that been so powerful that Uryu hadn't needed to think about them. But now he was thinking and when Uryu thought about things he worried about them, like the weird faces and expressions he must make and how red his face always felt when he was pressed against Ichigo. Especially as he'd always worked to put on a specific front to Ichigo with the sole purpose of annoying him and not letting him know what he really wanted or was really thinking. Uryu didn't know why he did that. He did the same thing with everyone he met.

Ichigo quietly opened his bedroom door. Uryu bit his lip, hesitating as Ichigo drew him forward. _I don't know what to do._

As Uryu stepped into the room, he paused. Darkness and moonlight slipped across Ichigo's bed from the window, spilling out across the futon bed Isshin had made up and the smooth floorboards. Comforting, tentative light that could hide so much, even your own self if you wanted to pretend you were something or someone else for a while. Abruptly Uryu realised that this might be easier than he'd thought.

Ichigo raised his hand for the light switch, but Uryu quickly pushed him against the wall and kicked the door shut behind them. He kissed Ichigo on the mouth, deepening the kiss so much that he felt Ichigo gasp quietly in surprise.

In the dark, Uryu didn't have to worry about being Ishida Uryu anymore with his pride to uphold and other worrying things like that. He could lose himself amid Ichigo's heavy breaths.

Not that he didn't want to see Ichigo's face; on the contrary, he was actually growing rather fond of those stupid expressions he pulled all the time. But at least like this he didn't have to worry about Ichigo seeing his face.

_Because I'm not used to people seeing me like this. Because Ishida Uryu doesn't get embarrassed. Or…_

Fall in love.

_Especially with boys._

And biting, something intimate that had seemed impossible for a cold person like Uryu to achieve, could be done. Uryu was barely in control of himself anymore. He found himself kissing Ichigo's neck without even realising he'd moved from his mouth.

Ichigo tilted his head to expose his neck more. "Ishida, I've been hoping you'd do this…"

Uryu's teeth ached, even more than they had this morning. Moving his hand from Ichigo's shoulder, he pressed a finger into his mouth. His canines were bigger than before. Sharper too.

_They must change depending on my mood._

"It's all right," Ichigo murmured.

Uryu had been bitten dozens of times by Ichigo so he knew it wouldn't hurt. He opened his mouth, pressing his teeth carefully against his neck. He hesitated, letting his deep breaths rub over Ichigo's skin. Ichigo pressed his hand to the back of Uryu's head to push him closer. Uryu felt his fangs pierce the flesh. He bit deeper. Harder. Enough to make Ichigo groan lightly.

Uryu loosened his bite. Blood squeezed up through the wounds, but there wasn't enough. Uryu bit down again. And then again. Pulling his fangs back, he wrapped his mouth around Ichigo's blood-soaked skin and sucked enough for the sweet taste to fill his throat.

_Finally..._

He was shivering as that dry feeling that had haunted him for hours was drenched at last. And that something he had been craving for so long was as good as he'd imagined. He sucked hard, draining as much as could. When the flow slowed, he bit down on Ichigo again to open up new wounds.

Ichigo pressed his hand to the back of Uryu's neck. "Uh...Ishida... we need... to... be... quiet," he murmured through deep breaths.

Uryu supposed he must have been moaning. He sealed his mouth tightly around Ichigo's neck, concentrated on sucking rather than leaving his mouth open for moans and other unintentional sounds of pleasure to emerge. Ichigo wrapped his arms around Uryu, groaning quietly and breathing deeply in a way that made Uryu desperate to suck harder.

"Ishida…"

Blood filling Uryu's mouth so much that he couldn't swallow without gasping.

"…you're…"

And he couldn't stop because the sweetness of it was addictive.

"…kinda fierce."

_Kurosaki, you've coped with far worse._

The thought entered Uryu's mind without him even thinking and he didn't like it because he didn't want to hurt Ichigo. But it was still difficult to force his jaw to loosen. He licked his lips as he felt blood slipping from the corner of his mouth. "Sorry," he breathed.

Ichigo let out another deep breath. "I like it. Bite as much as you like."

"I always said you were a brute. How typical of you to like it rough."

The kind of words slipping from his mouth that Uryu thought he would never possibly say. In the dark, he heard Ichigo's surprise too and then something that sounded like a grin. Uryu smiled back before pressing his bloodied lips against Ichigo's.

Kurosaki, there are always going to be things about me that I'll hide. And things about me I can never tell you or show you.

But with the darkness helping him, he might be able to reveal a few things.

"Kurosaki," he murmured. "How fierce do you want me to be?"

"How fierce do you think you can be, my pretty, clean white Quincy?"

Uryu kissed him again. He nibbled on Ichigo's bottom lip, enough to open a cut that drew blood into both of their mouths. Pulling back, Uryu kissed Ichigo's throat. Biting, sucking and then slipping his hands from around Ichigo's back to instead fumble with the zip on Ichigo's sweater.

_Kurosaki, this may make up for the ridiculous outfit you picked for me._

Because Ichigo was wearing a zip-up sweater and nothing else. No buttons to fiddle with and no t-shirt to push out of the way. Uryu pressed his hands against Ichigo's bare chest, running his fingers across the toned muscles.

And as if he had read his thoughts, Ichigo pressed his mouth close to Uryu's ear. "I got the feeling you had a thing for zips."

Uryu smiled before biting Ichigo's chest. He slowly lowered, kissing, nibbling and sucking on Ichigo's stomach, leaving a trail of bloody lip marks as he did. Kneeling on the floor, he pressed his hands against the side of Ichigo's legs, tugging on Ichigo's jeans a little before moving his hands to the button and zipper.

"I...shi...da..."

Uryu slid the jeans down Ichigo's legs and then pressed his teeth against his inner upper thigh, close to the hem of his boxers. He bit hard, licking up the blood that was released.

"Uryu..." Ichigo tangled his fingers in Uryu's hair.

"What have I said about first names, Kurosaki?"

Ichigo wrapped his arms around Uryu as he dropped to his knees. Uryu knew what he was planning. As soon as Ichigo tried to push him backwards onto the floor, Uryu turned slightly, enough to grab Ichigo from the side to knock him off balance.

_Got you!_ Uryu was breathless as he pushed Ichigo hard against the floor.

"Heh. You think I'm easy?" Ichigo muttered. "Now it's my turn to be fierce with you."

Uryu couldn't hold Ichigo's arms back as they grabbed his waist and suddenly he was being wrestled onto the futon. Ichigo chuckled as he rolled up Uryu's tanktop, exposing his stomach. His warm mouth met Uryu's skin skin. Uryu moaned, quickly biting the sound back as he realised how loud he was. That dizzy feeling he loved as Ichigo's teeth pressed into him. The smell of blood and the rough, pleasurable sensation of Ichigo sucking hard.

Uryu almost turned limp. Almost.

_No, no. I'm not letting you win this time, Kurosaki!_

He pushed against him as hard as he could to roll him off the futon. Laughing amid deep breaths, they scuffled across the moonlit floor, legs tangling as they tried to pin one other. But suddenly Uryu felt the wall against his side. Nowhere to go. Pinned between the wall and Ichigo. And Ichigo laughing quietly in triumph as he held Uryu against the floor and climbed on top of him again, kissing the hands that Uryu frantically pushed forward to fight him off.

"No..." Uryu grabbed Ichigo's arms, but he could never win against that _ridiculous _strength. And it annoyed him. He heard himself hissing.

"Whoah, what was that noise for? Angry vampire Uryu?" Ichigo laughed. "What, you don't want this? Or maybe..." He rolled them over so that Uryu was on top of him. "...you want it like this?"

Uryu smiled as the moonlight fell across Ichigo's face, highlighting mischievous brown eyes and flushed cheeks speckled with droplets of blood.

_You're really going to let me do this to you?_

But Uryu could feel his smile fading as a quiver rolled over his skin. Excitement fading to something more fearful, even though he'd been fantasising about this all evening. "I-I don't know what to do..."

Ichigo cupped his face with one hand. With the other he clasped Uryu's and guided it to his boxers. "I can help you figure it out. Start by putting your hand here. Or your mouth if you're feeling really amorous."

* * *

**And that's all you're getting – Uryu and Ichigo need some time alone! And poor Uryu will never forgive me if I let you see too much :D (and I also think crude sex writing ruins a story!).**


	11. Chapter 11

**Updates from now on will be very sporadic. I'm moving house and jobs - my new house is hundreds miles from my current house so it's a big move! I promise I'll update when I can but I'm going to be very, very busy until I settle in. This chapter is late because I've been too busy packing and panicking!**

**But to make up for it, I bring you fanservice.**

**Thank you to all my reviewers :) I really appreciate your comments. elvinapotter - I haven't planned for it and I'm not sure where abouts it would fit in since I know exactly what's happening in every chapter until the end. I'll see what I can do!**

* * *

"It's not true! It can't be true! _Chad! _Do you know what's happened to Ichigo?_ Do you?_ How did this happen? I tried to educate him so many times as to the beauty of breasts and I thought he understood! How? How can things now be like this? How can Ichigo forsake boobies and soft female skin? How can he fall into the dark? How, Chad?"

"Um..."

"They were holding hands when they came through the school gates. _Ichigo was holding hands with a freakin' guy!_ And not just any guy. The gloomy nerd that everyone is supposed to hate! It's a fundamental rule of the schoolyard and Ichigo has broken it in so many blasphemous ways! Boys of our age aren't gay! And if they are they at least have the decency to hide it until we've all graduated and then they become those shocking scandals that you hear about years later when we're discussing what happened to all the guys we hated at school around a bottle of sake in some bar surrounded by sexy women serving us even more sake. And it's never supposed to be your friend who is at the heart of a scandal!"

"Um. Being gay is hardly a scandal."

"Don't defend him, Chad! We need to do something! He's dating Ishida! I-shi-da! They spend enough time together as it is and now they'll be no stopping them and Ichigo will never have time for me! It's not fair! I've known Ichigo for years! How can he ditch me for a guy?"

"Um..."

"Chad! Do something, do something, DO SOMETHING!"

Keigo. He always overreacted to everything. Chad liked that about him. Keigo had a furious energy that was mesmerising to someone like Chad who had never really known what to say or do in social circles. But in addition, that energy was something that Chad had never been quite sure how to respond to.

"Um..."

Chad, Rukia and Orihime had just arrived at the school gates when Keigo came flying over in an erratic flurry of arms and legs. Chad had taken a detour this morning so that he could meet up with the girls outside Orihime's apartment. Though if the truth be told, with the sun finally showing itself and the fingers of a slight warmth slowly breaking through the season's chill, Chad would have liked to be alone to enjoy the morning in quiet contemplative thought. During stressful times, it was soothing to be quiet and to think of something completely superfluous to any of your current worries, like the beat for a new song or the beautiful sadness of golden, dying leaves being scattered across the pavement at this time of year.

But instead, the morning's walk with the girls had been a different sort of quiet; a tense silence interspersed with the odd nervous "but they're bound to understand..."

_Aren't they?_

"We have to save him!" said Keigo. "I told him to stop being so gay but he didn't even acknowledge that I existed!"

"Um, Keigo-"

"I hate him, _I hate him!_"

"You're just jealous because Ichigo is finally getting some action and you aren't," said Mizuiro, yawning as he played with the keys on his phone. "I told you ages ago he was going to turn out gay. I'm relieved he's finally admitted it to himself."

"He's not gay! He can't be gay! I _hate_ him! And I hate that Ishida even more! He's done something weird to Ichigo. Never trust a four-eyed-"

"Keigo!" Rukia roared. She balled her fist, but just as she was about to slam it into the side of Keigo's head she stopped quickly, as if she suddenly remembered that Kuchiki Rukia, the transfer student, was the sweet kind of girl who wrapped everyone around her finger rather than bash them over the head like Kuchiki Rukia, the truth.

And even though Keigo knew who she really was now, she'd been reprising her old role anyway and Keigo, in turn, had been playing along, no doubt secretly grateful since he revelled in the simplicity of school life, which Chad knew had shattered for him after he'd discovered what had been happening right under his nose with Ichigo and the others.

"Oh Keigo, that sounds terrible!" Rukia said sweetly as she lowered her fist. "Where are they? We'll go and speak to them at once. I promise I'll make him see sense."

"Ah, Kuchiki! You're an angeeeel! Ichigo has to see the merit of girls when he sees you. This can all be fixed, right? He doesn't really wanna take it up the butt, right? Him and Ishida-"

_Well, at least they came to school,_ Chad thought, his mind wandering as Keigo babbled and grinned at Rukia. Uryu must be feeling better._ Thank god._

Because Chad didn't like to see people upset. Especially Uryu. It was all the more painful to see someone who never gave a hint of breaking down crumple in front of you. And it was Chad's fault because he should have seen this coming. He'd always known that Uryu was more vulnerable than any of them.

He shook his head. _I need to stop thinking like this._

Thinking of the past and what ifs solved nothing. The important thing was to remedy them, which meant apologising to Uryu and then discussing things more calmly.

Isshin had emphasised the latter part yesterday evening. Urahara had called Isshin to explain the situation, putting the phone on loudspeaker so that Chad and the others could join in the discussion.

_"The most important thing is not to panic them,"_ Isshin had said._ "I've actually met a vampire once before. If they feel threatened, they will run and I guarantee that none of us will ever see them again. I'll go out and find them and bring them back home. I can keep an eye on them while we figure out what to do."_

And then it had been agreed that that Ichigo's house should be a no-go area for the rest of them.

_"They need a place of safety. And when they've calmed down, you'll be able to talk to them in a more ordinary fashion. I don't know what we should do. It's the right thing to fix them, of course. But... I'm not sure how any of us will cope with the aftermath. I don't know if I want to cope with the aftermath. Ichigo has been happy these past few days. It's been a long time since I've seen him free of worry."_

Chad had lain awake all night thinking about it, even though it wasn't like him to let anything circle his head. Sleep and rest were necessary and it was important not to burden such activities with worries that could be faced during the day.

But despite that, Chad had stared for hours at the dark ceiling as the moonlight gradually altered its slender shape.

Ichigo and Uryu running away? And never being seen again?

And Chad had realised, with a cruel irony, that he understood some of their fear about being separated. Because just as they feared losing one another, Chad feared losing both of them.

_They're friends who actually understand me._

As amusing as Keigo was (currently explaining to Rukia with exaggerated, voluptuous gestures which famous bikini models Ichigo should date to cure him of his gay nerd fetish), Keigo was Keigo. He constantly made Chad smile and drew him into the conversation, for which Chad would always be grateful for since he didn't know how to enter conversations by himself, but Keigo was not Uryu, who Chad could talk to about typical non-boy subjects like cooking or stuffed toy repairs, or Ichigo, who Chad could talk to about anything.

Chad wouldn't know what to do if the two of them disappeared.

_I'm only trying to do what's best for them._

Even if it hurts.

_Because we're all friends. And we'll help you to pick up the pieces._

And somehow Chad had a feeling that whatever happened, someone was going to fall to pieces before too long.

"Keigo, where did you say Ichigo and Ishida were?" asked Chad.

"They're outside of Ichigo's classroom making a right spectacle of themselves," said Tatsuki, suddenly appearing beside him. "Orihime, I've been trying to call you since morning practice ended at the dojo, but your phone is off again."

"Oh? Sorry, Tatsuki-chan. I forgot to charge it."

"You're so forgetful. I told you to charge it every night when I gave it to you. So, what's going on with Ichigo and Ishida? I mean, it doesn't surprise me in a way, but it seems a bit sudden. I didn't even know either of them had come out."

"It's a long story. They're just not acting like themselves at the moment." Orihime pressed her hands together tightly and Chad noted her face turning red as she desperately tried not to blurt out the entire story about vampires, blood and everything else that was probably better best kept between them.

"They've been brainwashed," said Chad. "By a monster."

"M-monster?" Keigo gasped. "Is it still around?"

"No."

"You're into weird stuff again aren't you?" said Tatsuki.

"They're always into weird stuff," Mizuiro added.

Tatsuki shot a look at Chad and Rukia. "You two had better look after Orihime! What exactly has happened? You're not in danger are you? There's no weird guys-"

Orihime smiled. "No, it's not like that this time. It's just a little something that happened to Kurosaki-kun and Ishida-kun. They're fine apart from... well... Anyway, we're trying to sort it out."

"Then huuuuurry up!" cried Keigo. "I can't bear that blatantly gay behaviour! What if it's contagious? What if I find myself uncontrollable drawn to guys? Bleurgh!" He paused. "Wait, wait." His eyes suddenly grew so wide that it looked as if they might pop out of his face. "Does it work the other way? You know? If girls are exposed to it then will they start touching each other -"

"Shut up." Tatsuki rapped him on the head with her knuckles. "Can you fix them?" she asked, looking between Chad, Orihime and Rukia. "I doubt being brainwashed is good for them."

"Not at the moment, but we're working on it," said Rukia. "And first things first, we need to talk to them and tell them to get a grip."

"Oh, they've got a grip on each other all right."

* * *

Chad didn't have a problem if Ichigo was gay. He really didn't. He'd suspected that Ichigo might be for a while so it wasn't even that big of a shock. It wasn't disgusting (though equally it wasn't something Chad wanted to experiment with himself. EVER) and it wasn't something people should be afraid of admitting.

But there were some things that you really, really shouldn't have to see. He froze as he reached the corridor outside Ichigo's classroom, where a small crowd of gasping students had gathered in a semi-circle around Ichigo and Uryu. Beside him, Orihime and Rukia's mouths dropped in unison.

"Told you," said Tatsuki, sucking on a juice pack. "They're making a spectacle. Chizuru almost died of happiness when she saw them."

Ichigo had picked Uryu up and had him pressed against the corridor wall, with Uryu's legs wrapped around his waist and his hands on Ichigo's face as they kissed. Not a light kiss either. There were definitely tongues involved.

And even though Chad had known they were a 'couple' and had told himself it was cool if they really were gay (it was just the vampire part he had issues with), he still felt a bit queasy. Because they were his best friends. And... just... Tongues. Tongue kisses. And accompanying wet noises.

He heard a click beside him. Slowly Chad looked down (a long way down). Rukia was holding her phone out. It flashed as she took another photograph.

"Kuchiki...?" he said.

"Yes, Sado?"

_Don't ask. Just don't._

Actually, a lot of camera phones were out. The crowd was mostly female and lots of the girls were squeeing with that funny little noise that girls made sometimes when they saw something they liked.

"And Ishida-san looks really good with contact lenses!" someone said.

"Oh."

A small sound from Orihime. Chad could have kicked himself because he should have thought of some excuse for her to wait outside in the school yard because she shouldn't be seeing this. It made Chad feel weird, but for her the shock would be much more painful because the one she loved was pressed against someone else.

But now that Orihime had seen it, Chad didn't have a clue what to do and he felt useless as he watched her eyes growing wider and wider. "Kurosaki-kun and Ishida-kun...?" she whispered.

"Um, Inoue, why don't you..."

"Wow..." Orihime muttered. She puffed up her pink cheeks as she pressed her fingers to her mouth and started chewing on them. "Oh..." Her eyes grew wider still. "They..."

Chad paused. It wasn't a look of horror on her face (far from it, in fact). She moved closer to the front of the crowd, leaning forward as Uryu tangled his fingers in Ichigo's bleached hair.

"Tongues...!" Orihime whispered. She glanced at Rukia, who was taking another photo.

"Don't worry. I'll send them to you," said Rukia.

"Oh." Orihime's face looked like a beetroot. "Thank you (I want one to use for the screensaver on my phone)."

_Girls are weird._

And Chad didn't get them at all. The crowd was growing and the people at the back were jumping up as they tried to see over everyone else's heads. Some boys tried yelling some rude comments in between making vomiting sounds, but their efforts were half hearted since everybody knew that Uryu and Ichigo were not to be messed with.

"Number two and number six?" Chad heard one girl mutter to her friend. "Is this for real? Someone must have put them up to it."

"Number two and number six?" Chad repeated.

"The girls have a top twenty rating of boys in the school," said Tatsuki. "Ishida shot to number two when he became president of the student council. I think the glasses type is in fashion at the moment, though I don't get it personally. Ichigo is number six. He used to be a bit higher but he's turned a bit apish in recent months."

"The girls think his hair is weird too," Rukia added. "He does look like a delinquent."

Oh. Chad wasn't sure he needed to know about the intricacies of high school girls...

"Takeshi in 2-b is number one. And guess who's number three?" Rukia patted Chad's arm. "Girls dig that tanned skin and those toned muscles."

He really didn't need to know that (although actually, that was pretty useful information to a healthy, non-gay schoolboy).

And Chad was certain he wasn't gay. Uryu was nuts for turning down Kawada-san. And Iwata-san. And all the other girls he'd turned down, seemingly without even realising that they'd been asking him out. Though occasionally Chad had wondered if he should be gay. He knew most teenage boys didn't collect fluffy toys. Abuelo had collected teddy bears so Chad hadn't really thought it was a problem until Keigo had found out. _"Chad, you know that's not normal for boys our age, right?"_

Why not? Shining eyes and fluffy faces were somehow comforting in an empty apartment. And they reminded Chad of Abuelo and his collection.

"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" the girls in the corridor squealed as Ichigo pulled his mouth back from Uryu's and instead tilted his head as he aimed for Uryu's neck.

Chad froze. _Surely not. Ichigo wouldn't do that here..._

In a school corridor...

_Though Ichigo isn't exactly himself right now._

Smiling, Uryu pressed his hand to the back of Ichigo's head to pull him closer. Ichigo opened his mouth and Chad could see teeth, larger than they should be, slowly closing around Uryu's skin.

"Ishegoingtobitehim? Shouldntwestopthem?" Rukia didn't seem to know whether to run in and thump both of them or take another picture with her camera phone.

Chad strode forward into the circle, quickly seizing the back of Ichigo's uniform to drag his mouth (and teeth) away from Uryu.

"Chad?" said Ichigo.

Now Chad was closer, he could see that Ichigo's neck was completely covered in badly concealed bruises and puncture marks.

_Really didn't need to see that._

He really didn't need to know what type of person Uryu really was (apparently a bit violent and not like the quiet, prim, proper type he was supposed to be) and-

_And I really don't want to think about any of that!_

"This is not acceptable behaviour for school," said Chad.

They stared at him; Ichigo cautious and Uryu...

Uryu...

"Number three is getting involved!" a girl across the corridor whispered, her voice somehow managing to echo across the corridor. "It's going to be a threesome!"

"These girls are all screwed in the head," a boy somewhere muttered. "Always said that Ishida was a fucking gayboy."

"And should have known Kurosaki would be the first one he'd bum. They're always bunking off school together."

Chad had expected Uryu to still be wary and vulnerable, but instead the Quincy was glaring at him with tight blue eyes. If Uryu hadn't have been pinned between Ichigo and the wall, Chad suspected there would probably be a reiatsu bow in his hand aiming for Chad's head.

Well, at least he didn't seem so painfully frightened anymore. But that didn't mean that things were good. Because Uryu was definitely still not Uryu.

Chad pulled his hand back from Ichigio's school blazer and lowered his voice. "There's no need to think you're being attacked. I'm not trying to hurt you. Or slip you any tablets. It's just not acceptable behaviour and you know it." He glanced at Uryu. "We're sorry about yesterday. We didn't mean to upset you."

"I don't care about that anymore," said Uryu. "I've got more interesting things to think about now." He stroked Ichigo's cheek with a hand and then leaned forward and kissed him on the lips.

"He's probably right," Ichigo muttered, tilting his head away and looking around quickly at the crowd with reddened cheeks, as if he'd only just noticed everyone (though how he could have missed them was beyond Chad). "God, people are nosy." Reluctantly, he slid Uryu's legs one by one back to the floor, while Uryu glared at Chad. Chad had forgotten how good Uryu was when it came to cold looks like that.

_Ishida, I'm not your enemy. I swear..._

Ichigo smiled. "Ishida, don't look like that." He lowered his voice as he straightened Uryu's uniform for him. "I'll bite you later."

Chad didn't need to hear that. Or see Uryu's smile in return. Yes, it was nice to see Uryu smile for once but not in this slightly creepy way at creepy things involving blood and biting and Ichigo.

"Chad, let's have a little talk. Just you and me," said Ichigo. "Ishida, you have physics first, right? Your favourite? I don't want you to be late so I'll see you at break." Cupping Uryu's face, he kissed him on the mouth.

Tongues. Definitely tongues. The girls were squeeing again. Chad stared patiently at the ceiling.

"OK everybody, show's over," said Tatsuki, striding into the circle and clapping her hands.

"Next show starts at break and there will be a spectator fee of two hundred and fifty yen each?" said Rukia.

"Eeeeeehh?" squealed the girls in protest.

"Hoi! Don't sell tickets!" Ichigo snapped.

"Then maybe you shouldn't turn your relationship into a sideshow!" Tatsuki roared as she slammed her fist into Ichigo's stomach.

"Arisawa-san..."

Tatsuki froze. Chad froze too. Uryu was standing right behind her.

Hirenkyaku. He must have used hirenkyaku to get behind her so quickly. In school. In front of everybody.

"When did he move?" Chad heard someone muttered.

If he used it just once he could get away with it, but if this became commonplace...

"It's my job to manhandle him, Arisawa-san. I'll be angry if you damage him," said Uryu.

Tatsuki looked as if she was holding her breath and Chad could see her silently considering her options. She could beat anybody up. But actually, Uryu was an unknown power to her and with just one movement he'd made her feel completely outdone. And that knowledge made her furious because Tatsuki was not the type of person to feel inferior to anybody.

"Ishida, go to class before you're late. Or before the teachers realise how the president of the student council is acting," said Chad.

"I don't really care about any of that," Uryu answered, his eyes holding that icy, impenetrable look of his. "Whatever. See you later, Kurosaki."

Chad watched Uryu until he'd disappeared into his classroom. Beside him, Tatsuki balled her hand into a trembling fist. She swung her bag over her shoulder. "Get them back to normal," she whispered. "Or I'll break every bone in Ishida's body. I don't care if he has weird powers. I'll kill that arrogant twat if he ever dares speak to me like that again. And then I'll use his arms to bludgeon Ichigo to death. And if anything happens to Orihime, I'll do the same to you!" She raised her voice. "Orihime, let's go!"

"Um. OK." Orihime glanced between Chad and Ichigo, who was leaning against the wall, silencing any gay jibes or backside jokes from the boys with a glare that promised to kick their heads in if they didn't shut up.

"I'll fill you in later, Inoue," said Chad. He glanced at Rukia, who was staring down the corridor towards Uryu's classroom. "You too, Kuchiki."

She nodded as she lowered her voice. "We need to get this sorted as quickly as possible."

A lot of the girls were still staring, reluctant to head to class in case anything else 'exciting' happened. Chad gestured to Ichigo to follow him down the corridor to the boys' toilets, as this conversation wasn't anything he'd like to be overheard. Opening the door, he checked that all the cubicles were empty and that they were alone before speaking. "Ichigo-"

"Chad, I don't want to argue with you. We've been through a lot. Even before Hollows and everything else, we were friends and I don't want anything to change."

"How can it not change? You're human. You're not supposed to be a vampire."

"I can't help what happened to me. I know you're uneasy, but I'm still the same person. And I won't be biting anyone else. It's only Ishida, as weird as that may seem." Ichigo smiled. A small, intimate happy smile that Chad had never seen on Ichigo's face before. "It's weird, but it kinda works somehow. I guess that must be so bizarre for you and the others."

"Not really. It doesn't bother me if you're gay. I always thought you liked guys."

"EH?! Wha...t? You...?" Ichigo shook his head frantically. "I'm not gay! I just like Ishida. It's different!" He paused. "Even though Ishida can be an annoying prat at times. But anyway, it works."

"I don't mind if you like Ishida. Or if Ishida likes you, but you're not the same, Ichigo. Little things about you are different. And Ishida is behaving nothing like his usual self. He used-"

"Hirenkyaku? I'll tell him not to use it. It was out of order."

"It's not just about that. Ichigo..."

It was hard. Ichigo looked like Ichigo. Only happier in a way that Chad had never seen before. And it would be all right...

_Except for the fact that a vampire raped you and forced this whole thing onto you._

Chad sighed. There was no right answer. "Ichigo, he's a wreck. Yesterday he was crying and now he seems to have no regard for anything. If the teachers had seen you both earlier, he'd lose his position on the student council. He worked so hard to get that, remember?"

Ichigo leaned against the cubicle wall, staring at the floor, his smile fading into a deeper, more furrowed expression. And Chad knew him well enough to know exactly what that expression meant.

_Ichigo, you're worried about him too. _

"Chad, I'll speak to him," Ichigo promised. "He'll calm down. I get that you're worried, but can we compromise? Can we see how this pans out? Stand back and watch. And maybe there won't be any need for you to find a cure. Chad, I can't lose him. And I can't let him lose me. Do you know what that would do to him? For the first time in his entire life he's happy. I don't want him to lose that."

That wasn't true. Uryu had been happy at other times but he just hadn't showed it. He was happy when he hung out with Chad, Ichigo and Orihime, even though he pretended it was a chore. Though Uryu was so complicated that he probably didn't even know what he feeling emotionally most of the time anyway.

But that was Uryu's problem. And problems could only be dealt with by dealing with them. Surrendering to a vampire's hormones wasn't a solution.

_And I think Ishida has really started to understand himself better this last twelve months and he's facing up to his own complex nature._

What was happening now though could destroy him.

Chad took a deep breath. What was the best action? Isshin had said he didn't know what to do. And he'd admitted that he was a coward for wanting to leave Ichigo and Uryu be_. Because they're happy and they'll definitely be unhappy if we get involved. And it'll be stressful for all of us._

There was one question though that could reveal the right course of action.

"Answer me honestly, Ichigo. Did you talk to Ishida before you turned him into a vampire? Did he consent? Or was there an argument or a fight of some kind? What happened between you both?"

He was phrasing it politely using those words because he really didn't want to speak the 'r' word aloud.

Ichigo rubbed his neck; the same thing he always did when he felt awkward about something. He stared at the floor for a second and then met Chad's gaze directly. "No."

Chad paused as Ichigo's honest brown gaze drilled into him. "To which part? Consent or a fight?"

A pause.

"Consent."

Chad had already known that would be the case. But actually hearing it out loud still made him ball his fist up and smash it into the nearest cubicle door, splintering the wood and sending a bruise rippling under the skin of his knuckles. "Damn it, Ichigo!" he roared.

He punched the door again and then swung round and hit the wall. Because he remembered that hitting something as solid and as relentless as stone had always felt useful in his unruly days. And even though it wasn't useful, it simply felt good to hit something, especially as Chad didn't let himself hit things anymore (unless they were Hollows or other enemies, of course), or admit that it was something he still enjoyed.

And the dark side of himself that he'd been repressing for many years cackled at the split in his composure.

"Chad..." Ichigo stared dumbly in shock. "You hands..."

Chad took a deep breath as he wiped the blood from his knuckles on his uniform. "No problem. Sorry."

Leaning over a sink, Chad rinsed the stone and splinters from his hands in the warm water. Ichigo handed him a hand towel. "I let you down, Chad."

Chad splashed water over his face. "It's not your fault."

_Why didn't I keep an eye on you?_

"I don't think vampires can regret. I don't feel bad about what happened. I know that's not normal but all that seems to matter to me is that we're happy. I'm sorry, Chad. I don't want to fight you, but Ishida is happy and I'll do anything to protect him."

Chad forced himself to smile. "At least I know Ishida is being looked after." He took a deep breath. But this solved everything. They had to find a cure. _And I'm sorry if that means the two of you have to face some things you'd rather forget about._

"Ichigo, we should get to class."

* * *

_I hated life before this._

Before being bitten, Uryu hadn't thought he'd hated everything. If someone had asked him if he was happy he might even have said yes since the vague contentment before being a vampire had classified as happiness to someone like Uryu. And besides that, you should never admit to someone that you weren't happy because it might either make them uncomfortable or make them feel compelled to make you happy (certainly, an idiot like Ichigo would never have let the matter drop).

_But I must have hated it. _

Because whenever Uryu looked back now, all he remembered was how miserable it had been to sit alone in his damp apartment every evening surrounding by the smell of Hollow blood that seemed to permanently stick to his clothes no matter how much he soaked them.

And even if he hadn't thought it a problem at the time, it must have been miserable because it hadn't involved Ichigo sitting beside him with an arm wrapped around his waist. Uryu couldn't imagine being without that, even though it had been the strangest thing in the world yesterday morning.

Lunch breaks on autumn days usually involved a warm scarf (white of course) and a book. And that one cosy chair beside the radiator in the library by the window overlooking the school yard. Books were something you could drown in; a welcome relief from the cold world outside (and the cold world inside of Uryu).

But Uryu didn't need books anymore. In fact, a book was useless now since all it would do was take him away from the world that he had once longed to escape but now wanted to revel in.

Sitting between Ichigo's legs and leaning back against his chest, Uryu stared at the sky with a vampire's eyes that could see the colour of the breeze against the blue and white. No wonder he had been miserable before this. The sky had always been a Tokyo grey through his old gaze, not a brilliant blue that Uryu couldn't help but smile at.

The frozen chill of the past few days had thawed with a comparatively mild day that smelt of dry leaves. Uryu didn't have his scarf with him. They'd left Ichigo's house early this morning so that Uryu had time to go to his apartment and get changed (with Ichigo helping, of course). But overly excited hands had made Uryu forget about his scarf, as well as most of his school books, which on any other occasion would have really irked him.

But things like that weren't important anymore. He was wrapped in Ichigo's scarf; the blue and green patterned wool encircling both of their necks as they sat together on the grassy corner of the school yard. In a role reversal, Ichigo was the one who was reading. Tilting his head, Uryu watched Ichigo's intent eyes and furrowed brow trying to take in the words of the textbook. He looked funny when he studied with his forehead screwed up like that and his cheeks slowly puffing as he neared an angry grump about something in the book he couldn't understand.

Uryu brushed a finger against Ichigo's cheek. "Hey Kurosaki, it looks like you need a break. What classes do you have this afternoon? Sports and Japanese?"

"You know my timetable better than me. I need to read this for class but it's boring."

Uryu smiled. "Then let's go."

"Huh?"

"Let's go somewhere."

"After school?"

Such a dumb vacant expression on Ichigo's face that seemed far more amusing than Uryu remembered it looking. "No, idiot. Now. It's warmer today and the sun is out. I know a nice place out of town up in the hills. Nobody ever goes there so we won't be disturbed."

"Ohhhhhh?" Ichigo grinned. "And what would we do when we got there?"

"Whatever we want. Because Sado-kun won't be there to stop us."

Uryu supposed that a school corridor wasn't the best place to succumb to vampire urges, but it wasn't as if similar things didn't happen in the school since there always seemed to be some student clamped to another student's face in the corridor at break times (really, when had schools in Japan started to go downhill?). And if everyone else was allowed to couple up then Uryu didn't see why Chad should take offence.

_And_ it was just rude to interrupt moments like that.

Ichigo chuckled. "Not like you to skip classes. You downright resent it when I drag you out to take on Hollows. What's with this change of opinion?"

Sitting up, Uryu rearranged himself in Ichigo's lap until he was sat astride him. He plucked the literature book out of Ichigo's hands and draped his arms around his neck. "There are far more interesting things in this world than Hollows, Kurosaki. And classes."

_Like everything that happened last night. _

Ichigo sighed as he leaned his forehead against Uryu's. Gently he unravelled Uryu's fingers from the book. "Do you know how hard it is to say no to you?"

"Why would you even want to say no? I'll never fall behind and I can make sure that you don't either."

_And it's not as if I'll be able to concentrate in class at the moment anyway. _

"Because..." Ichigo kissed him lightly on the lips but before he could pull away, Uryu clasped his face and pressed their mouths together tightly. He felt Ichigo trying to draw away but he refused to let him go until they were both out of breath.

"Ishida..." Ichigo's brow was furrowed again. If possible, the wrinkles were even deeper than they had been earlier and Ichigo looked so funny that Uryu couldn't help but laugh.

"What's with that look? You're brooding on something. I don't like it."

"You're not acting like yourself. You hate skipping classes."

"You skip them all the time."

"But you don't. And I heard a rumour you got in trouble for not doing your physics homework. It gets round quickly when someone like you doesn't do their homework, Ishida."

"When have I had time to do it? I'll catch up later. I promise."

Though maybe the homework wasn't worth doing. Uryu knew those equations and the rules behind them inside out so it was pointless to do any more of them. He hadn't even gotten into trouble this morning; it had just been a slightly sarcastic comment from sensei. People like Uryu never got into trouble because his grades were too good.

But Ichigo was still frowning at him and his eyes were adopting that stern, worried look Ichigo had sometimes. The look that Uryu had always hated because he could feel it eating up Ichigo's insides.

"Kurosaki, don't worry," he said softly. "It really doesn't matter."

Ichigo cupped Uryu's face. "I think all that blood you drank last night has gone to your head."

Uryu smiled as the thought came to his mind. "One of them anyway," he answered coyly.

And forcing the dirty comment out of his mouth was worth every effort as he saw the expression on Ichigo's face. The frown lines vanished into surprise amid a stawberry-red blush and a burst of laughter.

"You didn't just say that... Ishida Uryu would _never_ say something like that!"

Uryu pressed his head against Ichigo's shoulder to hide his own red face, although actually he might be able to get used to talking like this since it elicited such a pleasing reaction from Ichigo. "So, are we going to leave?"

"All right, we'll go to this place you know, but after school. And if you're a good boy then I'll let you bite me wherever you want."

Still the reluctance to cut classes, which was slightly offensive considering the number of times Ichigo had run out of school for lowly Hollows. Uryu sat up. "I'm biting you whether you like it or not."

"Oh rea-"

Uryu leaned forward, pressing his lips against Ichigo's neck and biting through the skin.

"Uryu!" Ichigo hissed. "People are watching!"

People had been watching them and whispering all lunchtime. Uryu would usually have been the first to shuffle away at such attention since he didn't like the sensation of eyes scrutinising his every move (reminded him of Ryuken as he searched for something to criticise), but weirdly it didn't feel bad today. And actually he liked the way the attention changed the colour of Ichigo's face and made him squirm slightly.

"Ishida..." Ichigo's voice was somewhere been desperation and a euphoric gasp.

Uryu sucked hard enough to drag a moan from Ichigo's lips before relaxing his jaw enough to speak. "I forgot. Shinigami aren't used to be seen are they? I like it when you're nervous. You're such a brash idiot most of the time that it's nice to see that you have some character depth."

He bit down again, nibbling lightly against the skin as he sucked. Blood seeped across the grey of Ichigo's colour, slowly staining the grain of the fabric. "Oh Kurosaki," Uryu murmured. "Your uniform is getting soiled."

_Which means I'll just have to take you out of it. _

"What happened to my nervous Ishida?" Ichigo muttered, but he was grinning as he wrapped an arm around Uryu to pull him closer. "I miss discounting your complaints." Ichigo leaned forward, licking the front of Uryu's throat for a second before slowly biting him.

Uryu tilted his head back as he tangled his hands in Ichigo's hair. Around them, he could feel the eyes from students desperate to soak up every detail of the scandalous scene that was occupying the school yard so that they could gossip about it later. And for the first time Uryu suddenly realised the power that he and Ichigo occupied in the school. Two kissing boys in any school would become a target for being beaten up (because kids are stupid and immature when it came to things like that), but nobody had dared try to beat Uryu up in years because everybody knew that he could mop the floor with anybody. And even if he didn't then Ichigo was usually around to break their teeth.

_The two of us together means that we can get away with anything we want._

And how many times had Uryu walked past disgusting couples in the school corridors flaunting their excessive emotions? Reminding Uryu that there were some things he'd probably never have.

_So it's my turn now. _

And it was particularly satisfying since he knew how many girls were after Ichigo. He moaned as Ichigo bit deeper, pulling his head closer as the blood loss turned him dizzy.

Ichigo licked the last few drops from Uryu's neck as the school bell suddenly droned across the yard. He kissed Uryu on the lips, leaving behind traces of blood for Uryu to taste.

"You've had what you wanted now back to class with you," said Ichigo. "How else will you be my perfect Uryu without those sickeningly perfect grades of yours, bookworm?"

"Grades don't matter anymore. As long as I have you, I'm happy. I don't need anything else."

Ichigo paused. A few drops of blood remained at the corner of his mouth so Uryu leaned forward and licked them away, in exchange for a red-smeared print that he left across Ichigo's lips.

"Ishida, I'd rather you were still you," said Ichigo softly.

Uryu laughed. "Why are you being so weird? I told you it's fine. I'm just happy at the moment. Things have never been like this before." He wrapped his arms tightly around Ichigo as he leaned against his shoulder and rearranged the scarf about their necks. _Cold days don't have to be cold anymore. _

"Go to class, Ishida."

"Not going." Uryu used his teeth to pull down the zip of Ichigo's blazer and then gently undid the top button of his school shirt. He pressed his mouth against the skin. He couldn't go to class, not when he could smell the blood from the raw marks on Ichigo's neck. And what Uryu had just drank was not enough. And just being close like this wasn't enough either. Because last night had been wonderful, but also awkward in certain places as Uryu figured things out. Uryu didn't like not knowing how to do something and a repeat without the fumbling would show Ichigo that he knew what he was doing

A low rumble suddenly reverberated across the school yard, although nobody else moving across the yard to get to classes seemed to hear it. Ichigo sat bolt upright. "Hollow."

Uryu shrugged. He'd sensed it earlier, but it wasn't a high level. "I can shoot it from here, though Kuchiki-san will be able to sense it too."

And it was her job more than Ichigo's to deal with Hollows since she didn't have to juggle a real life and the spirit world.

Ichigo paused, staring at the substitute badge tied to the loop of his school trousers.

"Kurosaki, instead of skipping classes for a Hollow, why don't you leave it to Kuchiki-san and instead skip classes with me? She's already left the school. You can sense her too, right?"

"I guess so." Ichigo looked out through the fence over the city. "It doesn't seem to be at a high level. They should know better than to come here by now."

Uryu smiled as he clasped Ichigo's hands. "So let's go."

"All right. Let's go."

* * *

**So Isshin, Yuzu and Karin know, Ichigo's friends know. Who's going to be next to find out I wonder... **

**Heh.**


	12. Chapter 12

**THE FILTH THAT IS DRAGON FALLS HUMBLY BEGS FOR YOUR FORGIVENESS!**

**Because an update this late after it was all going so well with the updates is atrocious and I'm so, so sorry! But here I am at long last. Things are crazy right now but I am moved and I've started my new job which is the best job in the world! Sadly I don't have a lot of time for writing at the moment so bear with me until I get myself sorted!**

**And even though I am filth, many of you have left lovely reviews. Thank you so much to all of you, especially Kurai, baerbelhaddrell and Victoria, who spent time leaving really long reviews, and for all of your well wishes during this busy time!**

**Have some fluff. Though it gets less fluffy as it goes on...**

* * *

"Kurosaki, do you prefer night or day?"

"Huh? What's with that weird question?"

"It's not weird. I just think that ever since becoming a vampire I've preferred the night. There's something different about the reishi. They feel softer."

"You and your reishi mumbo jumbo. I can't tell the difference."

Uryu and Ichigo's hands were tightly clasped as they walked through town together after spending the afternoon in the quiet emptiness of the hills outside of Karakura. Rush hour had taken hold of the darkening evening. The smell of petrol from rumbling engines, and criss-crossing incandescent illumination from cars, neon advertisements and humming, orange streetlights. A crush of Japanese workers drearily heading home with grey, work-washed eyes.

Uryu hated crowds and avoided going anywhere at this time of the evening, but in the warmth of entwined fingers it felt as if they were the only two people in the world. And Uryu was learning that a vampire's mastery of reishi and senses was perfect. He could filter out the artificial noise and glare, replacing it with the light breath of the evening breeze. Even though such a sound was always drowned by mankind, it was still there and a vampire's ears could find it. And Uryu could smell it too, even over the city's mechanical aroma. The autumn evening quivering with reishi and the promise of rain later tonight.

Uryu sighed at the baffled look on Ichigo's face. It was unbelievable how good Ichigo was at confused facial expressions. "Kurosaki, you need to pay more attention to my mumbo jumbo. I tolerated your uselessness at reishi control when you were a Shinigami but there's no excuse for being ignorant now."

"Yeah, yeah, I get it."

"You're not listening! You always say that when you're not listening! And you never listen to me!"

"What was that?"

"I said that you never listen to me!"

"What was that? Sorry, I wasn't listening."

Uryu glared at him. A grin threatened to cover Ichigo's lips. Oh. Uryu had fallen for his teasing. And Ichigo was loving every minute of it judging from the smug look on his face. Uryu tried to drag his fingers away but Ichigo refused to let him go.

"See? This is why brute strength is so useful." Ichigo grinned as Uryu tried to shake their hands apart. "I'm not letting go. Mine."

"Why are we together again? I've suddenly been reminded of how irritating you are."

"You're fun to tease, Ishida. You've always been fun to tease and you get this funny frown on your face when you realise what I'm doing. But, contrary to your belief, I do get the whole night is better than day thing. Because at night there are more places to hide." Ichigo suddenly ran into the opening of an alleyway on the left, pulling Uryu behind him and not stopping until the narrow walls obliterated the rush hour light. He pinned Uryu against the brick wall as he kissed him. "We could do whatever we wanted and not be seen," he murmured.

Uryu tried not to smile because he was determined to remain annoyed with Ichigo, even though he could feel a pleasant heat prickling his neck and face as Ichigo gently tickled his tongue over Uryu's ear. "Oh? You were the one winging about being tired earlier, Kurosaki. You said you were hungry and wanted to go home. Thinking only of your stomach."

"It doesn't matter if we're a little late. Besides, I feel more awake now I've had time to recover from your earlier assault."

"Assault? You make it sound like it was all against your will."

Uryu had used to go walking in the hills with his grandfather, and later on had done most of his Quincy training there. There were hidden parts that nobody else seemed to know about. Nobody to see two boys pressed against one another or hear them moaning into each other's ears.

They kissed, nibbling on one another's lips to exchange sips of blood. Uryu wrapped his arms around Ichigo's neck. Two teenagers making out in a dark alley. It was a disgustingly common (and tacky) thing to do. The kind of act that made people sneer and tut at in frowning disapproval.

_But people only disapprove because they're jealous of happiness. _

Because Uryu had always been jealous of cosy couples. As much as he had shook his head in disgust, he'd been jealous at the way they could shut out the world with their own excessive feelings of ecstasy.

And he could see the appeal of hiding in the dark and drowning in heavy breathing, a warm mouth and Ichigo's hands sliding beneath his school uniform.

"Kurosaki..." Uryu murmured softly. He intended to say more than his name, but nothing made it out. Uryu was getting better at speaking his mind. It was fun to say things that made Ichigo grin or blush or smile, but some things were still too hard to say. "I..."

_...think I love-_

"Ishida, you have a side to you I never would have guessed at," said Ichigo in between blood-drenched kisses. "I kinda thought you'd be the type who wouldn't want anyone touching your clothes in case they got creased. And here you are docilely letting me pin you up against an alley wall."

"Docilely? Only because I want something from you. And the way you talk makes it sound as if you were fantasising about crumpling my clothes before all of this vampire business began."

"Maybe a little."

"Though getting my clothes creased _is_ a little annoying. And doing this in a urine-stained alleyway is disgusting."

"I don't care." Ichigo knelt down, pressing his mouth against the front of Uryu's trousers.

Uryu let out a deep breath as Ichigo clasped his thighs. "You're going to do that here?"

Ichigo kissed the hardness beneath the fabric. "Nah, I'm just teasing you. Because it's fun."

Ichigo grinned as he stood, but Uryu's pressed his hands hard against his shoulders. "Back on the ground, Shinigami."

"Coming round to the alleyway idea?"

"I could be persuaded."

* * *

"You bastard. You left me," Ichigo muttered, his hands deep in his pockets and his face puffed out in a sulky expression as he stared at the ground.

Because wrapping mouths around very intimate places was never a good idea in a public place. Dark alleyways were all well and good, but they were still frequently used by other people, particularly at this time of the evening.

Uryu was trying so hard not to laugh that he couldn't even walk in a straight line. "I wasn't staying around to get caught. You made up an excuse didn't you? It looked like you were answering a 'call of nature', Kurosaki."

"It was embarrassing!" Ichigo hissed, his cheeks the colour of a tomato. "That old lady screamed so hard I thought the police were going to come running! And all you did was laugh at me from the roof of that office!"

Thank god for hirenkyaku. Uryu had been out of sight before the woman had even known there was another boy there, which would have given away what Ichigo had really been up to. "You started the alley thing. Accept the consequences," said Uryu.

"You were the one begging me to do it."

"I didn't beg, Kurosaki. Are you going to admit that the Quincy are better than Shinigami? Because unlike you, I don't have to fumble for a piece of wood and then worry about what to do with a dead-looking body. You don't have a very convenient escape method do you?"

"I can't believe you used hirenkyaku in public _again_."

"I'd hardly call it public. I moved as soon as I heard someone coming so she didn't see me. It would have been worse if she'd seen us both and you know it."

"You're pushing your luck. It's only a matter of time before you run into trouble. Do you know how many white ghost rumours are going around Karakura Town because of you prancing around in those ridiculous outfits?"

"Look who's talking? Your colour coordination is always off and you look like a clown!"

"Black and white go together perfectly!"

"I'm not talking about your draughty Shinigami outfit. Your 'normal' clothes, Kurosaki, look as if they've had a fight with an ice cream factory and lost. And my outfits are not ridiculous! I have a simple white hooded jacket. It's classy."

"White is always ridiculous. You look like an anorexic snowman."

Uryu stepped forward, gathering the reishi around him as he used hirenkyaku to zip around the people in front of them. He stopped as he reached the street corner just ahead. Looking back, he grinned at the gaping expression on Ichigo's face.

"Uryu! Stop it!" Ichigo hissed as he hurried through the crowd. "People are staring!"

"Kurosaki, it's fun isn't it? Want to have a race tonight? You can use your Shinigami form and we'll see who's faster at doing a lap over the rooftops. I bet I can catch you."

"No. I am not encouraging you."

Uryu smiled and then moved again, through the traffic and the waiting crowd on the other side of the road. And then he continued through the street, only stopping when he reached the edge of the town centre where the rush hour crush abruptly thinned.

Hirenkyaku had been tricky to get the hang of. Uryu had taught himself from some notes he'd found from his grandfather and for days he'd consecutively bruised himself as he experiment up in the hills, invariably running into trees or tripping over rocks. He'd only really got the hang of it in Soul Society, where the technique had been much easier to use with the abundance of reishi, but even then there had been limits to how quickly he could manoeuvre, especially in mid air. Running through a crowd or an enclosed space would have been impossible.

But as a vampire, hirenkyaku was as simple as breathing. He didn't brush against anybody even once. And the best thing about hirekyaku was that Uryu had reishi beneath his feet as he used it. Uryu loved the feel of reishi and he was dizzy for a moment after he stopped, as if he'd just breathed in too much oxygen.

"Ishida!" Ichigo was out of breath as he caught up. "Seriously, stop it." He grabbed Uryu's shoulders. "I don't want you to get into trouble. And what if something goes wrong and you run into a truck and get squashed?"

"I'm not going to run into a truck. I'm not an idiot! Kurosaki, it's fun. We always use our powers to fight Hollows. What's wrong with using them for other things too?"

Uryu had always liked using his bow. The feel of reishi between his fingers, the sensation of the arrow cutting through the air, the meditative state of being able to sense everything that was around him. The reason he knew the maze-like hills outside of town like the back of his hand was because he'd explored them thoroughly in the search for empty places where he could shoot a volley of arrows undisturbed. Apart from sewing, it was the only thing he'd ever enjoyed.

"Ishida-"

"I didn't have much fun growing up, Kurosaki. And for the first time I can see the world in a different light. Let me enjoy it. This is normal, correct? Teenagers running through town and generally flaunting themselves in disgraceful ways?" Pressing himself against Ichigo's chest, Uryu kissed him, smiling as he heard the gasps from the people in the street around them.

He could feel Ichigo resisting him, seemingly conscious of the stares. And it made Uryu smile even more because nervous Ichigo with his clammy fingers was strangely alluring. And it was funny because Uryu felt that it should be him who was nervous. It had been terrifying the first few times he'd touched Ichigo's bare chest, so terrifying that his fingers had been trembling. And yet all of that tentative fear had dissipated last night with every pleasurable gasp that had come from Ichigo's lips.

Slowly Ichigo drew back from the kiss. He looked around with red cheeks at the crowded street and then smiled at Uryu. "Come here a moment." Pulling Uryu down a side road, away from the main street, he hugged him. "I like this side of you. I like seeing you not miserable for once and it's kinda fun when you pounce on me, albeit I'm not always expecting it because I'm sure Ishida Uryu isn't supposed to leap at people like that. But... calm down a little. Chad is worried about you. He thinks you're running wild. And you are. Look at you; teasing me into that little session at school, cutting classes and throwing yourself at me in a crowded street. I don't mind, but it's not really you."

Uryu folded his arms, refusing to return the hug. "It's not fair. Anybody else our age could get away with this behaviour. Why is it me who gets told off?"

"I'm worried. Because I'm the one who did this to you. Against your will."

"It wasn't against-"

Ichigo tightened his grip against Uryu. "Yes it was. You were petrified. Things only changed when I bit you and you started turning into a vampire. Everything that has happened is my fault. Please don't lose yourself. I can't bear it if-"

"Don't talk like that!" Uryu snapped. He shoved Ichigo's arms away. Ichigo froze, his brown eyes widening.

_And don't look at me like that._

Because Uryu hated that look of Ichigo's. The frightened look. The worried look. The expression that he didn't show to most people, and that most people didn't seem to see, but Uryu could always see it, even when Ichigo was desperately trying not to let others see what he was feeling.

_And it always hurt._

Because Ichigo was the lucky one. The one with the family. The one who'd dragged Uryu out of a nonexistent life. The one Uryu had always needed. Uryu needed Ichigo to be happy because that had always made Uryu feel content.

"Don't talk about it," said Uryu, taking a deep breath as he spoke. "You were correct. You told me I would understand when you bit me, and I did. I'm glad everything happened the way it did. I was scared for a while, but it's fine. I'm happy. "

"But-"

Uryu pressed his finger to Ichigo's lips. "Discounted. And in case your tiny brain has forgotten what that word means, it means shut up."

Ichigo smiled, kissing Uryu's hand before taking it in his own as they resumed waking. "But you know, Ishida, we should probably tone things down,"

"Why? Not worried about getting pregnant are you?"

"No, stupid, I'm worried about hurting you. You're covered in bruises and it looks like I've been beating you up. And it does kinda hurt when we... you know..."

Yes, it did hurt. But each time it hurt a little less. Besides, it was easy to forget when pain turned to pleasure.

"We've both been beaten up dozens of times. We're used to it," said Uryu.

"Speak for yourself. When I fight people I beat them up."

"Ulquiorra practically killed you."

Ichigo didn't answer and Uryu realise immediately that he was an idiot for even mentioning that name. A shadow had appeared on Ichigo's face and Uryu too felt the shade falling across him as he remembered Ulquiorra and Ichigo silhouetted against the Hueco Mundo moon, and how hard it had been not to scream and lose himself like Orihime. He'd had to stay calm for her sake and the memory of how everything had felt back then still made him sick.

He squeezed Ichigo's hand, reminding himself that Ichigo was here and safe and that they didn't need to be separated ever again. He cleared his throat. "Maybe you're right about toning things down a little." And _only_ a little. "Urahara-san said that vampires live for longer than ordinary humans. If we rush everything now I may get bored of you."

"I'll make sure you don't get bored, Ishida. There's a million gay porn sites out there with interesting positions and ideas."

"Have you looked?"

"I needed something to distract me that night I realised I was becoming obsessed with you."

"That's filthy, Kurosaki!"

But it did explain why Ichigo had known exactly how things worked the first time they'd been together. Uryu had wondered about that...

"Don't look at me like that! It's no different to all the guys at school looking at magazines of women. And it wasn't anything weird," Ichigo muttered.

"Everything is always weird when you're involved."

"Shut up. Discounted!"

Ichigo's face was that funny red colour again and Uryu couldn't resist. Stopping and turning to face him, he tilted his head as he pressed his mouth against Ichigo's neck. Lightly he bit, sucking at a vein.

"I thought...we...said...you know...toning...things down?" Ichigo murmured, even though his hand clasped the back of Uryu tightly to press him closer.

Gently Uryu withdrew his teeth. Ichigo and his blood were warm; a reminder that he was alive and that the events in Hueco Mundo were long past. _But things like that are always happening to Kurosaki. _"Hey Kurosaki, will you stop doing idiotic things?"

"Eh?"

"You know like running into fights without being prepared or taking on more than you can handle. You're strong, but we can only ever do so much. I've always-" Uryu suddenly froze as his skin shuddered all over. Hollow. He looked behind them. It was on the other side of town and it was big. Uryu could even smell the decaying scent of its broken soul from all the way over here.

Ichigo followed his gaze as he seemed to sense it to. "It's fine. Rukia's already on the move. And Urahara-san can back her up if necessary."

Uryu paused, gauging the Hollow's strength. He could have handled it alone, but if he went then Ichigo would follow and Uryu didn't want him involved with Hollows anymore. But Rukia should be able to handle it. And she'd have the others to help if needed. Uryu glanced at Ichigo's untroubled brown eyes. Normally he'd be itching to go after the Hollow. "Kurosaki, are you going to give up being a substitute?"

"It's not something I chose to do in the first place. All I wanted was to protect people. And I'll still do that. If Rukia gets in trouble and the others aren't strong enough then I'll go and help her."

Uryu squeezed Ichigo's hand a little more. He'd never wanted Ichigo to stop being a Shinigami because being a Shinigami was important to Ichigo. But he'd wanted him to stop because being a Shinigami always resulted in Ichigo almost getting killed. Uryu being a Quincy and Ichigo being a Shinigami didn't bother him anymore. Not since Ichigo had pointed out that same fact that Uryu's grandfather had always tried to hammer home.

"_Shinigami and Quincy should work together." _

Although it did elicit comments from Ryuken. "_You strut around and call yourself a Quincy and yet your best friend is a Shinigami. How ridiculous and hypocritical. Nothing good will ever come from it."_

"_He's not my best friend."_

Although Ichigo had always known him infuriatingly well.

"Heh. You're doing that typical Ishida thing. Thinking. And worrying," said Ichigo suddenly.

"I'm fine."

"Really?" Ichigo stopped and faced him, planting his hands on Uryu's shoulders so that he couldn't get away. Just as Uryu had a few moments ago, Ichigo leaned his head close and pressed his teeth against Uryu's neck hard enough to tease out a line of blood. He sucked lightly for a second. "I'll make you a deal. I'll be more careful about the fights I choose, but you should do the same too. You know that Soul Society is watching you, right? I don't think they'd ever do anything against you, but I was always worried in case you drew their attention too much."

Urahara had said something similar after Ichigo had lost his powers. "_Ishida-san, I know you feel that you should take over Kurosaki-san's role as the town's first defence, but you should be cautious. Soul Society has decided to overlook you, but you shouldn't draw attention to yourself. Let me handle most of the Hollows. I'll contact you if I need your assistance."_

"All right," said Uryu, staring at the blood staining the contours of Ichigo's lips, "but I-NEW FABRIC SHOP!"

Uryu bolted across the road towards the red-painted shop, pressing his hands against the glass as he stared at the fabric on the display. He remembered hearing that a new shop was opening but he hadn't realised it would be this soon. Of course, Sunflower Sewing would always be the best place to go, but the fabrics in the window looked to be just as good and there was a discount since it was the opening week.

"That would be perfect for Kuchiki-san's dress," he murmured.

"A dress for Rukia?"

"She asked me to make one." Uryu unfolded the picture Rukia had given him a few days ago. He'd looked through the supplies he had, as well as the ones in the school handicraft club, but nothing was the right colour.

"I thought you were angry with them for interfering earlier?"

"I was. And still am, but I like making dresses. And we should make an effort to get along. I'll get something for the trim while I'm here. And that white fabric looks nice..."

"Isn't white like... white?"

"Don't criticise things you don't understand, Kurosaki! There are many shade of white. You have-"

"You forget about me so quickly, Uryu." Ichigo kissed him on the mouth. "Go geek out. I promised I'd pick some things up for tea from the shop. My house isn't far from here so we'll meet back there. You-"

"No. You come with me." Uryu grabbed Ichigo's arm.

"It'll be fine. It's a ten minute walk home."

"Come with me. I'll teach you about sewing."

"No offence, but I'll die of boredom and jealousy while you dribble over cotton. Ishida, it'll be fine." Ichigo kissed him on the lips.

Uryu glanced at the shop. Maybe it was better to leave it for now and go home with Ichigo but that fabric... Uryu liked it...

_But I don't like being without Kurosaki._

"All right," he said finally, but he clutched Ichigo's fingers hard, "but make sure you're careful. I know they don't have a cure but I... worry about you... because... well..."

Ichigo smiled as he cupped Uryu's face. "Go have fun. I'll meet you back home and maybe we can have a bath together."

Uryu almost forgot about the fabric completely but Ichigo was pulling his hands away and waving as he started down the street. Uryu sighed as he glanced back at the shop window. At least now he could spend as much time as he wanted without Ichigo pestering him about when it was time to leave, though Uryu wouldn't be too long. He stared at the white fabric and grinned. "I wonder what he'd say if I made him something white..."

With a Quincy emblem on the back. Maybe a whole Quincy outfit just to see what Ichigo looked like.

"Uryu."

An emotionless drone that made Uryu feel as if he'd been crushed. He felt his eyes widening as he stared at the reflection behind him in the window. He tried to run but before he could even move a blue flash him hard enough to force him to crumple against the pavement.

The flicker of a reflection standing behind him that Uryu desperately didn't want to see. A blue flash that hit Uryu hard enough to crumple him against the pavement.

"Ichi..."

_I couldn't even last five minutes without you._

* * *

"What do you mean you don't have anything yet?"

"It's only been a day, Kuchiki-san. These things take time. I've spoken with Captain Kurotsuchi and I've bought some data back with me to study for now. You need to be more patient."

Rukia stood in the lounge of the Urahara Shop, tapping her foot while Urahara and Tessai sat cross legged on the tatami floor sipping green tea from sakura-patterned mugs and offering one another adzuki sweets. She swore they were looking lazy and laid back on purpose, impelling her sandalled foot to tap faster and faster against the floor. In fact, she had an odd feeling that she was the entertainment for their late evening tea.

"I wouldn't mind being patient if you were actually doing something!" she snapped.

"The boss has some data running for analysis. There's nothing more we can do at the moment," said Tessai. "And it's important to make time for tea. Are you sure you don't want a cup, Kuchiki-dono?"

"No I don't want a cup of tea!" said Rukia. Though the sweets looked nice. Like the ones Nii-san always ate. But now wasn't the time and even if there wasn't anything they could do she still couldn't bring herself to just sit and nibble something sweet. There _had_ to be something they could do. "They are _completely _out of control! They've had their tongues so far down each other's throats that I'm surprised they haven't suffocated!"

"What a vivid description of a perfectly normal act for a pair of teenagers who have entered into their spring times. Kuchiki-san, you always said that Ichigo should be out and about enjoying the life of the living. And it sounds as if he is enjoying himself and getting some interesting experiences under his belt." Urahara flicked his fan in front of his face. "And the pun about being under the belt was fully intended."

Well, that had been _obvious._ "You are such a dirty shopkeeper! You seem to be enjoying all this!"

"More pretty girls for the rest of us! Inoue-san has been here twice today already!"

Rukia balled her fist but she was determined not to shout. Entertainment with tea thing and someone who was now part of the noble Kuchiki family would not lower herself into letting others wind her up. Even though they were winding her up. She sat and folded her arms tightly across her chest. Leaning forward, she grabbed the last adzuki sweet.

"Kuchiki-san, you may not believe me but I understand that the situation is far from ideal. But Kurosaki-san and Ishida-san are together and it seems obvious that they will take good care of one another. it could be worse."

"Everyone keeps saying that." Even Rukia had said it. "But... it's just..." _This whole situation is going to screw with both of them. We may all laugh at them being together because it _is _funny that they've landed with each other, but..._

How the heck would they cope afterwards?

"Kuchiki-san, could it be that you are jealous that Ishida-san is occupying all of Kurosaki-san's time?"

Rukia almost spat the sweet out. She half choked as she tried to avoid spraying crumbs everywhere. Quickly she took the tea that Tessai offered to her and sipped calmly as she tried to regain her dignity. She could see that look on Urahara's face; no different really to the way he'd been looking at her since she arrived but she _knew_ he was chuckling inside at her.

Well, she was a little jealous because whenever Rukia stayed in the world of the living she stayed with Ichigo and staying with Orihime, although fun, wasn't quite the same. She liked cooking with Orihime but she also liked sitting uo with ichigo until four in the morning talking about anything or nothing or bugging him with bunny drawings.

But Urahara meant a different kind of jealousy. Rukia wiped the crumbs from the corner of her mouth and then took a deep breath before slamming her hands on the table and glaring at the shopkeeper. "How dare you even suggest that! The age difference between Ichigo and I and the fact that I'm dead and the fact that he is not my type with that ridiculous hair and I always knew he was gay! But they are out of control and they're not going to classes in school and they're not dealing with Hollows! There were five today. Five! I'm sure the Hollows can sense that something is going on that's lowered the town's defence. Ichigo would never leave Hollows to rampage. What if someone gets hurt? Sado and Inoue have been trying to help me, but they're not as adept at dealing with Hollows as Ichigo, or even Ishida. I'm worried. And seriously, they ALWAYS have their tongues in each other's mouths!"

She took a deep breath. She'd stood again without even realising.

It had been interesting to see at first; two boys behaving like they were part of a supernatural yaoi story (in fact, it had been a bit of a dream to Rukia who loved that kind of stuff). But manga pictures were much more idealistic than the real thing, and even though there was definite something sexy about the two of them kissing the moment was watered down slightly when you saw the dribble beading at the corners of their mouths and the sweat darkening their school uniforms. And they'd kissed that much at school today that it had quickly gone from sexy to get your hands out of each other's clothes for god's sake.

And neither of them was really her type. Not that they were unattractive (even Uryu wasn't as pale and as skinny as he'd been when Rukia had first met him), but Ichigo was Ichigo (and thinking of him as anything other than her dearest friend was just weird) and Uryu was just a plain no. Although it had been delightfully fun to tease him in his apartment the other day and Rukia knew she could get used to that.

But both of them were just boys. She was hundreds of years older than either of them.

Maybe it was the age that was making her feel a bit motherly.

"They're ruining everything for themselves. Ishida has always been OCD about keeping up with school and Ichigo has tried so hard to maintain his grades on top of being a substitute Shinigami." And Rukia felt bad because she knew Ichigo wanted to do better in school (particularly when Uryu and Orihime seemed to get brilliant grades in everything) and he would have been doing much better if it wasn't for everything she'd put on him. She clenched her fist. "They don't care about school. They don't care about anything except each other. _I_ don't care if they're happy. They're not the same. And if they'd been told about the consequences of becoming vampires before it happened and given a choice, I know they wouldn't have chosen this life."

"You say that with such certainty, Kuchiki-san. They are both complex characters and we know nothing because neither of us can remember what it is like to be human. Kurosaki-san and Ishida-san; I think they both had desires that neither would dare voice. Aren't vampires incredible in that way, Kuchiki-san? For being able to break the walls between what we think we should be doing and what we want to be doing? They're selfish. And utterly happy. Perhaps something like this is what they both needed."

"Not like this. It would be fine if it was real, but it's not. And you shouldn't be encouraging them. we're going to cure them and then what happens?"

"And then it's time to face up to who they really are. There will be a reason, Kuchiki-san, that Kurosaki-san bit Ishida-san in the first place. And it will be something that Kurosaki-san has been refusing to admit to himself for some time. Sometimes boys need things like this. Ishida-san too will have a lot to think about. He claims he's never been happy but now he knows what that feels like. He'll..." Urahara suddenly froze. "Ah, Kuchiki-san, I just remembered somewhere extremely important that I have to go! Look after the shop!" He scrambled to his feet and ran for the back door of the shop. Tessai was right behind him.

Rukia frowned as they both tried to squeeze through the door at the same time. "Huh?"

"Urahara Kisuke!" a voice roared.

The sliding door beside Rukia exploded with blue light. She gasped, throwing herself to the floor while reaching for the hilt of her zanpaktou as paper and wooden splinters showered the room. Staying low to the floor, she stared as a man's polished, white shoes stepped over the broken doorframe. And even though Rukia would normally already be on her feet at a time like this she felt oddly jittery. Enough to stammer her breathing and force her to remain motionless on the tatami.

_This man..._

"Urahara Kisuke!"

"Ah... Um..." Urahara had been knocked to the floor by the blast. He scratched his head as he tried to smile. Beside him, Tessai held a tea tray in front of his face inconspicuously. "Good evening, Ish-"

"What is going on?"

_Who?_ Rukia's mouth was dry. The explosion had been concentrated with reishi so powerful that the aftermath alone made her head throb. And yet the person who had caused it had no reiatsu.

_No, he has one. He has to have one with that power._

It was sealed. Perfectly hidden. How Urahara had sensed it...

"Ah, um..." Urahara waved his hands frantically. "It's a long story. Nothing major!"

"_Nothing major_?!"

Rukia stared up at the intruder from the floor, still unable to move. White hair. Rimless glasses. And the ability to turn the air leaden around him so that Rukia could barely breathe, let alone demand to know who the hell he was. She tilted her head and her mouth gaped. He was carrying Uryu, unconscious, on his back.

How had he separated them?

_How did he get past Ichigo? _

And Uryu wasn't exactly the type to go down easy either. This man didn't have so much as a hair out of place or a smudge of dirt on his linen suit.

_Ichigo... are you all right?_

He dropped Uryu to the floor in front of Urahara. "He has a disease in his blood. I analysed him at the hospital but no medicine in the world of the living will cure him, which means that _you_ have gotten him involved in something ridiculous again. Fix him. If I catch him holding hands with a Shinigami again, I will find you and Isshin and I will kill you both in an extremely slow and painful way. As for Kurosaki Ichigo, if this isn't resolved then I will castrate him. Without anaesthetic."

He stormed out. Not even a glance at Rukia, who he'd almost vaporised with his over-the-top reishi explosion. And he had noticed her; for some reason Rukia was certain of that and the fact that he was choosing purposefully to ignore her. As if she was something completely below him that didn't need acknowledging.

_Who the hell does he think he is?_

Infuriating arrogance. She should kick him in the face! _Don't ignore me!_

But...

_But..._

She listened to the sound of his footsteps leaving the shop. She couldn't move. If she dared even call after him he would kill her. Probably before she even realised what was happening.

_This man..._

Rukia realised she was holding her breath so tightly that it was starting to make her cheeks ache. She let it out slowly so as not to make a sound. The lounge was quiet. The footsteps were gone, but Rukia counted to sixty in her head, just in case.

"I'm getting tired of fixing doors in this place," Urahara muttered finally.

"Urahara-san, who was that?"

"Ah, have you never had the pleasure of meeting Ishida Uryu's father, Ishida Ryuken? He's the administrator at the local hospital."

Rukia stared. "He doesn't have a father."

"I assure you, he does."

"But..."

But there was no mistaking it now she'd been told. They definitely looked alike and that cold nature reminded her a little of Uryu, though if Uryu could be cold and icy at times this man in comparison was an ice age wrapped in an ice age, complete with a sharp, frozen spear that pierced your chest with every thud of his shoes or flick of his grey eyes.

"And he's a Quincy?" she murmured. It explained the use of reishi, but what he had just done was _nothing _like what Rukia had ever seen Uryu use. Her skin still quivered from the intensity of the blast. "Why didn't anyone tell me about him? Does Soul Society know about this?"

Why hadn't Uryu told her? Unless he hadn't told anyone?

"Kurosaki-san and the others have met him briefly on one or two occasions, I believe, but as you may have guessed he is not someone that Ishida Uryu associates with very often. They have a curious relationship."

Ichigo had known? He needed to tell her these things. And what a strange, strange man. And the fact that he'd seemed more bothered by the holding hands with a Shinigami part than the holding hands with a boy part... Rukia wanted to ask Urahara more about him, and how he could possibly produce a son like Uryu who, albeit cold, distant and moody at times, still enjoyed making girls' dresses, playing with ribbons and decorating his apartment with knitted bunnies.

"Pray that you never meet him again," Urahara muttered. "He is a little... terrifying."

_A 'little'?_

Tessai lent down beside Uryu. "He's been anaesthetised. Owner, you should take advantage of this."

Urahara peered at Uryu's face, peeling his eyelids back to examine his pupils. "Kuchiki-san, we'll need your help drawing blood samples. We need to move quickly. I have some samples of Kurosaki-san's blood, but they were taken before the transformation had completed. The opportunity to examine the blood of a full vampire is just what we need."

Rukia finally picked herself up off the floor. Uryu looked pale and his face seemed strained, but there was no sign of any cuts or bruises. "What's the rush? He's unconscious so you should take your time and-"

"Kuchiki-san, powerful people are all the more dangerous and terrifying when they're angry. Can you fight Kurosaki-san?"

Rukia froze. "Fight...him?"

"What do you think Kurosaki-san will do when he realises what has happened? If Ishida Ryuken has already examined Ishida Uryu in the hospital then it would suggest the kidnapping happened a few hours ago. What do you think Kurosaki-san will do when he tracks Ishida-san's reiatsu to here?"

"Oh."

He was going to go bananas. Beyond bananas.

"I'm not ashamed to admit that he could kill me," said Urahara. "Especially as I think he'll be angrier than we've ever seen him before. We'll take the samples and then make sure Ishida-san is ready for when Kurosaki-san comes looking for him. And I suggest we all practice looking innocent. And possibly our shunpo too so we're ready to make a run for it."


	13. Chapter 13

**IT'S AN UPDATE! YEEEEAH! So sorry for the delay. I had a big cosplay con to prepare for. I made a sternritter costume :D But I didn't foresake you all completely! I did write a short Uryu story a few weeks ago. I hope those of you who read it liked it!**

**And now, in this story, it's time to give Uryu's personality another prod into an interestingly dark place...**

* * *

Sometimes the right thing to do is not always the most sensible option when you take other points into consideration. Chad knew that him sitting cross-legged on the ground outside of the Urahara Shop waiting for Ichigo to come looking for Uryu was the best idea out of all the ones that had been discussed by everyone, but it was still foolish. Because Ichigo was going to be very, very, very angry and there was no guarantee that Chad wouldn't end up pasted all over the pavement.

He was taking a gamble on how well he knew Ichigo, and how much of Ichigo still remained in his vampire state. The old Ichigo would appreciate the honesty and the act of coming out into the open rather than cowering away. The new Ichigo though was capable of anything.

_"He's going to be furious, Sado-san. You will be putting your life at risk,"_ Urahara had warned. _"Captain Kurotsuchi's suggestion is probably the best course of action if we want to resolve the situation quickly. And if I'm present then I can ensure that Kurotsuchi-san doesn't go too far with his science. I believe we're all concerned about that point."_

Captain Kurotsuchi's wanted Uryu to be taken to his laboratory in Soul Society, thus hiding him from Ichigo and giving them a better chance of finding a cure since they'd be able to run all the scans and tests on Uryu that they wanted. It was probably the fastest way to resolve the situation, but it was wrong and disrespectful. And even though it wasn't sensible to rely on emotions and feelings in that way, Chad had still firmly refused the suggestion. Uryu hated Kurotsuchi. Chad wasn't sure of the details, but he'd heard pieces of disturbing information from Renji, Urahara and some of other Shinigami. _Experiments. Quincy. Torture._ Even if Uryu was dying Chad wouldn't send him to squad twelve. Pride was an indulgent burden, often becoming stupidity when it came to life and death. But pride was still pride. And sometimes it had to be respected no matter what.

And it was disrespectful to Ichigo too. Kidnapping Uryu and taking him away to somewhere Ichigo couldn't go without help from Urahara. It would be torturous and unfair.

Because even when he was cured, Ichigo would remember those feelings and would remember the underhand tactics that Chad and the others had used. And if he felt that Uryu was cured and lost to him, then god only knew what he would do.

_That other vampire leapt off a building when his wife died._

The cure had to be given to both of them at the same time to minimise the despair. Though how they would do that Chad didn't know yet.

_And if Ichigo felt the need to destroy himself he might take all of Karakura Town with him,_ Chad mused darkly.

He certainly had the power to do that with his Hollow in him. And it would be a real mess if it took control of him again. Orihime and Uryu had both told Chad about what had happened in Hueco Mundo, And Chad was also sure there was more to it that they hadn't told since he'd suspected they were holding back on some of the more sinister details.

_Of course, there's no guarantee that Ichigo won't destroy the town anyway._

Chad glanced down at Uryu, draped across his lap with his head against Chad's shoulder. He was still unconscious. Ryuken seemed to have given him some strong anaesthetics and Urahara had given him even more while withdrawing blood samples to analyse. Ryuken also seemed to have injected him with something that had temporarily 'hidden' him from Ichigo, according to scans Urahara had taken. It was a clever drug that Urahara had marvelled at, even to the point that he'd called Ryuken to ask more about it (Ryuken greeting the excited ramble with a stony silence before hanging up).

It seemed to be wearing off now. Vampires seemed capable of sealing their reiatsu perfectly since Chad hadn't really felt anything from Ichigo or Uryu recently (strange, since Chad had come to rely on the sensations without even thinking to assure himself that all was well). Every few moments though Chad could suddenly sense Ichigo's rage splintering through the vampire shroud as it became too powerful to hold back. And it was coming closer.

"He'll be here soon," Orihime murmured.

She was sitting beside Chad with her knees pulled to her chest. Urahara and the others had gone to Soul Society to work on the cure (as well as to hide in case Ichigo did let loose). As soon as Chad had volunteered to give Uryu back, everyone had said they'd stay but Chad had told them to go. Too many of them would be too threatening and Chad liked to think that Chad and Orihime, Ichigo's human friends who he saw everyday, would be able to make him see sense. Rukia had seemed to understand that, though Chad knew she was hurt by the accusation that Ichigo might see her as a threat.

Having Orihime beside Chad would also give him a reason to fight. If Ichigo went out of control then Chad wasn't sure if he would be able to suppress him. But having Orihime with him would give him someone to focus on and someone to protect if it came to having to fight. Otherwise he might just bow down before Ichigo and let him destroy him.

And, from a more selfish point of view, Orihime had a shield that could might in _very_ useful.

Chad raised his head to the evening sky, watching as a sliver of moonlight fell between a gap in the clouds. He grimaced as he sensed the violent flare in Ichigo's reiatsu across town. Beside him, Orihime clenched her fists, but her eyes were as firm as they had been all evening. She really was amazing. Even though she knew Ichigo was about to confront them - and hate them - she wasn't upset. She'd changed a lot in Hueco Mundo. There had been many tears after she returned; not in front of Ichigo, but many in front of Chad. But gradually they'd stopped and she'd adopted a new strength and resolve in place of trauma.

But this had to be hurting her. She loved Ichigo more than anything. And yet she was smiling gently at Uryu without any trace of resentment. "Ishida-kun looks cute when he's sleeping. He always seems to carry so many burdens but it's nice to see him free of them. Kurosaki-kun is going to be so relieved to see him."

"Angry relief, I think." Chad paused. Since discovering that Ichigo and Uryu had become vampires, he hadn't asked Orihime how she felt about it. She told him a lot of things that she didn't talk about with other people, such as Hueco Mundo and how she'd felt when Ichigo had lost his powers. But her romantic feelings seemed a little step too far somehow for her to disclose and Chad felt as if he would be prying if he asked. Whenever anybody mentioned Uryu and Ichigo she got a very red face and started looking wistfully at the photographs on her phone, but Chad had a feeling that the girlish excitement was almost a pretence to stop her admitting to herself that her world had just crashed down around her.

Chad took a deep breath. "Inoue, are you really all right about this?"

She smiled brightly. "Don't worry, Sado-kun. I'll protect us, but it will be OK. Kurosaki-kun will understand. I know he'll be angry, but he'll be OK and he won't hurt us. And even if he does, it would be because he's not himself right now and I'll be able to heal us."

That wasn't really what he meant to talk about. It was so typical of her to always think of other people. "You take it for granted sometimes that you can heal people," said Chad. "It's a wonderful power that you have, but it's best not to heal anybody. It's better that they don't get hurt at all."

"True. Sometimes it's a power I hate because to use it someone has to be hurt. I don't like seeing people hurt. But it's the role that I've been given and I have to accept that. And it's better than having no ability at all. Or being doomed to watch someone get hurt and know that you can never help them. It'll be OK, Sado-kun. And besides, I-"

Ichigo's reiatsu suddenly billowed around them, snatching the air out of their lungs. Suffocating. Threatening. Chad gasped, clutching Uryu hard as he silently told himself not to panic. It'll be OK. He'd be able to breathe in a moment. Ichigo wouldn't hurt them. He wouldn't hurt them...

Ichigo landed on the pavement a few metres away with his black bankai robes blotting out the street-lit evening outside of the Urahara Shop. Even over the sound of his and Orihime's strangled gasps, Chad could hear Ichigo's ragged breathing. Ichigo was also trembling. He didn't move for a second and Chad could feel the sweat rolling down his face as he sensed Ichigo deciding their fate with cool eyes that were so unlike him.

_I can't move..._

And even if he could move he shouldn't attack since it would only provoke more anger. He managed to dart his eyes towards Orihime. She had her eyes screwed shut, as if she was trying hard not to faint.

_Ichigo..._

Those eyes... a look that Chad had never seen before on Ichigo's face. He might actually kill them. Chad clutched Uryu tightly, determined not to drop him even as his arms seemed to be losing all of their strength.

And suddenly it was over. The reiatsu vanished as quickly as it had descended as Ichigo pulled it back under his control. Chad gasped as his chest finally filled with air. Beside him, Orihime was choking frantically. Chad held Uryu close as he stretched one arm out to brush his fingers against Orihime's.

"Are you all right?" he asked.

She nodded. "Ishida-kun...?" she murmured.

Chad looked at Uryu's face. There was no sign of discomfort. Even if he had been awake, Chad wasn't sure if the reaistu would have had the same effect on him. He stared up at Ichigo, who stood motionless as he watched them, waiting to see what they would do.

Even though his body was shaking, threatening to topple him to the ground, Chad stood. He tottered a step towards Ichigo. The tiny motion of bringing Uryu closer to snap something inside of Ichigo's eyes. The coldness vanished, instead flittering between pain and frantic panic.

"Chad, give him to me."

Chad held him out. Quickly Ichigo leaned forward, bundling Uryu tightly into his arms, touching his face and kissing his forehead.

Chad backed away slowly with his hands held up. "Ishida's dad arrived with him earlier and left him here. He seemed pretty angry about the vampire situation. We didn't kidnap him and we were waiting for you to come and pick him up."

Ichigo looked to be trembling even more than Chad was. "If you've done anything to him-"

"We haven't."

It wasn't a complete lie. They still didn't have a cure, but the blood samples Urahara had taken from Uryu should help change that soon, hopefully. But in the meantime, nothing about Uryu would have changed, which meant, for better or worse, the two would be able to stay together for a little longer.

Ichigo lowered his head until it touched Uryu's. His fingers were quivering. Chad had never seen Ichigo tremble before. No matter what he was faced with, Ichigo wasn't the type to tremble. He'd admit he was scared, even turn a little pale when they were faced with something truly terrible, but he never let the emotion run away with him, or control his body.

And now he was quivering so much that he had to crouch on the ground with Uryu held against his chest. And he was crying.

"Kuro..." Orihime stopped as she seemed to decide it was better to say nothing.

The tears fell onto Uryu's face as Ichigo stroked his hair.

How many times had Chad wanted them not to argue with each other? Or sulk with each other?

But this was much worse. Because Ichigo looked as if he might crumble.

Ichigo took a deep breath. Standing, he squared his shoulders and then turned his back on them. "Chad, Inoue, please... just leave us alone."

"Kurosaki-kun, I really don't think you need to worry," said Orihime. "Because even if you and Ishida-kun weren't vampires, you'd still love each other. I think you know that-"

Ichigo was gone, leaping into the air and disappearing with the speed of his Bankai. Chad blinked, trying to pick him out across the night and failing. He couldn't sense him either. Chad had known Ichigo for a long time. Even before they'd gained the ability to monitor each other using their powers, they'd stayed in touch by mobile phone or email. They had always been there for one another.

And now Ichigo was gone, a small part of Chad wondered if he'd ever be back. Because they didn't seem like friends any more. Instead, there was a iciness that made Chad realise that Ichigo, apart from Orihime beside him now, was the only real friend he had.

"He looked really upset," Orihime murmured. "I hope he'll feel better when Ishida-kun wakes up. We haven't cured him after all." She paused as she hugged her knees tightly. "Sado-kun, do you really think we should cure them?"

"How can you ask that?"

"Because I think it will break both of their hearts if we do."

Chad sat on the edge of the kerb beside her. "He's breaking apart anyway. Have you heard the phrase 'being cruel to be kind'? What do you think friends should do?"

"Whatever should be done. No matter the cost. I just wish..." Orihime clenched her hands against her legs. "I just wish I knew everything was going to be OK."

"You told Ichigo that he and Ishida would still love each other." Chad stared at the moon. A week ago he would have laughed at that, but strangely it worked. And now all the pieces of the puzzle were there, Chad could see that he'd completely missed the point of why Ichigo and Uryu had argued all the time. _People always say that you argue with the one you love._

And when the two had argued, everything else around them had ceased to exist.

But Chad had missed all of that. And he had a feeling that Uryu and Ichigo had not been aware of it themselves. Sometimes, even if an attraction was there, it wasn't mean to be acknowledged. Chad honestly had no idea how it would work out. And because he knew Orihime well, he knew she was thinking the same thing. And she confirmed it with her next words.

"But it'll be different. And I think it's going to hurt so, so much." She clutched her legs harder as she bowed her head. "And my power won't be able to heal them. They'll be nothing I can do for them."

"There will be lots we can do for them. Just being there for them will be enough."

_I hope._

He had to say something to reassure her after all.

* * *

"Ishida! Ishida! Ishida! _Uryu!"_

Uryu blinked. He'd been asleep. He was sure of that. But there had been no dreams. And he didn't remember going to bed. He stared at Ichigo's face. Frantic, erratic brown eyes that looked as if they might pop out of his face.

"Why do you look so ridiculous?" Uryu murmured thickly.

"Uryu! Is everything OK? Do you feel OK? Uryu!" Ichigo shook Uryu's shoulders.

"Stop it." Uryu felt sick as Ichigo violently swayed him from side to side. "And what have I told you..."

_About first-name terms? _

But he couldn't finish the sentence aloud. He was dizzy. Ichigo and the rest of the world tilting and rotating awkwardly as Uryu swallowed hard, grimacing at the stale taste that puckered the back of his throat. He pressed his hand to his forehead, focusing on the touch of his own fingers as he tried to straighten the rotating blur of everything else. He was trembling, but he didn't know why and there was a tight feeling of panic vibrating against his chest that made him feel as if he should be running away from something.

But everything had to be all right because Ichigo was holding him and Uryu couldn't sense Hollows or any other perceived danger. He swallowed, wishing his mouth didn't feel so dry.

"Ishida! You're all right aren't you? Nothing has changed?" Panic in Ichigo's voice. That rambling tone he adopted on rare occasions when he was babbling about something absurd.

"Stop being weird, Kurosaki," Uryu muttered.

There seemed to be a massive gap in his memory. They were in school. Why were they in school? And why was it dark? Moonlight spilling shadows from the window frames across the tiled floors in between the table legs and chairs. Both he and Ichigo seemed to be huddled in a corner of what looked to be their old homeroom when they had been in the same class.

Uryu pressed his head against Ichigo's shoulder because it hurt to look around. But it didn't feel as if he'd been injured. No lingering pains or memories of being torn open (and you always remembered the pain, even if everything else was blacked out). More a heaviness that reminded him of the times he'd been ill, which unfortunately were rather frequent. Though nothing ever came on this sudden.

_Remember..._

Amid the sickness there was a raw feeling clenching his stomach. Hunger pains. When had he last eaten? Dinner at Ichigo's house?

_No... wait..._

He'd never made it to Ichigo's.

And suddenly Uryu understood the frantic panic controlling his palpitations.

"Ryuken!" He sat bolt upright, the memory of the grey, narrowed eyes drilling into him from the reflection in the window of that fabric shop.

"It's fine. He's not here. I've got you back. Everything is all right," said Ichigo.

"Got me back?" Uryu muttered. He covered his mouth as heat flushed his skin and the classroom turned, initiating a dizzying response from his stomach. He felt himself falling pathetically against Ichigo's shoulder, clutching the Shinigami robes between sweaty fingers.

He couldn't remember anything. He'd had this sensation before after anaesthetic. The sensation of blinking and realising that several hours had passed and that you hadn't experienced anything. Not even a dream or a fleeting thought. A mindless black gap that felt as if death had swallowed you up for a period of time. And in Uryu's case, accompanying sickness to add to the misery.

"Yeah, I got you back," said Ichigo. "Your dad dropped you off at the Urahara Shop. And I fetched you. Is everything OK? Do you feel OK?"

"Don't call him my..." Uryu couldn't even speak the 'd' word. Just thinking about it made him feel sicker. And as much as he hated himself for it he was trembling even harder than he had a moment ago because there was a lump in his throat and a quiver in his mind as his brain stuttered over the reflection of Ryuken's cold eyes and everything that man was capable of.

Uryu had spent years being afraid of him. He still remembered an early time when there had been unrequited love with Uryu tottering around after him because a father was your father and you would love him no matter what, but it hadn't taken long for fear to sink in as his child-like mind had realised what kind of grown up Ryuken was. And then resentment. And then fighting back, though it hadn't been much of a fight with Ryuken simply glaring at him while Uryu screamed. And determination to make him pay for all those times Ryuken had caused Uryu to curl up in a corner of his room with his head buried against his knees, pyjamas damp with tears.

And then finally a few years of silence after they went their separate ways where Uryu had been almost able to kid himself that Ryuken didn't exist at all anymore.

Seeing him again after returning from losing his powers in Soul Society had brought back that resentment. And then Ryuken's demonstration of his Quincy strength had turned it back into fear, as well as furious envy. Because his power was on a scale that Uryu had never been able to imagine.

And in his training it had really felt as if he might die. Ryuken chasing him relentlessly. Arrows piercing flesh. Hands grabbing him if he dared to slump. Knowing he was enjoying the pain he was inflicting.

Uryu hated him. He hated him for always getting the exact birthday present Uryu wanted, even if he hadn't asked for it. He hated him for always keeping the freezer stocked with Uryu's favourite ice cream. He hated him for anticipating Uryu's needs. The new pencil case after Uryu's had been thrown in a pond at school, even though Uryu had never told Ryuken about the incident.

And it was unfair because most people had a decent father.

_And I hate you because despite everything you ever did you still turned out to be a rotten father who couldn't do anything but hurt me. _

"Ryuken..."

Pretending someone didn't exist wasn't enough to truly erase their existence. _But how did he find out?_

Because clearly he had found out. About the vampire thing. Give him one thing, Ryuken wasn't the type to simply drug Uryu for no reason. Unless he needed someone for a medical experiment. Uryu wouldn't put that past him...

"What happened?" he asked.

"I don't know. He took you away for a few hours and then left you at Urahara's Shop. Chad says they didn't do anything to you."

But there was a tremble in Ichigo's voice. And a sudden cold thump against Uryu's chest as he abruptly realised why Ichigo had looked so stupidly panicked when Uryu first opened his eyes.

A cure...

"No... no, no, no, no, no... he hasn't done anything. He can't have done anything," Uryu muttered.

_He would._

Uryu dug his fingers tighter into Ichigo's Shinigami robes. Grey eyes. Cold hands.

_Uryu..._

A voice that had made him hate the sound of his own name.

And Ichigo. An absolute idiot and yet still the best person Uryu had ever met. Even before all of this.

And to lose it...

Uryu shoved himself away from Ichigo's arms, falling onto his hands and knees as he vomited over the classroom floor, although with hunger still pounding there was nothing to eject apart from the stale warmth of saliva and stomach acid. "I'll kill him," he gasped. _"I'll fucking kill him!"_

Uryu screamed at the top of his lungs before vomiting again, the sensation so violent that he could feel it tearing the back of his throat. Ryuken... always taking everything...

_Mother died. And you might as well have died._

And Uryu swore he was going to kill him. Covering his face with his hands he screamed. Because the thought of going back to how he'd been before hurt too much. And knowing that it was caused by someone, who by all rights, was supposed to love you was even worse.

_Ryuken... don't take Ichigo... ._

"Ishida!" Ichigo wrapped his arms around Uryu from behind. "Don't... no... please. you're OK, aren't you? Chad promised! And we're still connected. The ribbon thing, right? You said they were tangled. I know I'm not as good with these things but I can still feel them. And I can still feel you. It's OK. It's OK, right? _Right, Ishida_?"

Uryu froze. The awkward thump of his heart pounded in his ears and with Ichigo pressed so close, he could feel his disjointed fear too. But maybe there was no need for it.

Because... ribbons... yes, he could see them if he concentrated. The dark red tangled with his.

And he still loved Ichigo. And he was pretty sure he'd be a bit disgusted at the thought of Ichigo hugging him if the vampire state had been cured.

"Ribbons..." Uryu murmured. He swallowed as he focused on the ribbons, materialising them and letting them slip into his fingers, soft against his clammy skin.

"It's all right, right?" Ichigo pressed Uryu's hand to his mouth, gently biting on the skin between Uryu's thumb and index finger. "It feels all right, so please don't scream like that... Ishida..."

Uryu gasped. It still felt amazing. The sensation of blood being drawn and Ichigo's warm mouth sucking on his skin. And the desire it awakened for Uryu to do the same to him. If Ryuken had done something then it hadn't worked.

_Because I'm still the person I want to be..._

"Hey, don't cry," said Ichigo. "Why are you crying? You're all right aren't you? Ishida..."

"I'm all right. Let me stand for a moment." Uryu rubbed his face as he stood shakily to stretch his legs. He didn't even know when the tears had started. Quickly he turned his head away from Ichigo, facing the shadow speckled wall for a few seconds to be alone as he blinked everything away under the moonlight.

_Because boys don't cry, Uryu. So stop being such a child._

Ryuken had even said that when Uryu's mother died. And even though most people could cry in front of others from time to time it was something Uryu would never manage. Especially Ichigo.

_Because I don't want you to think I'm pathetic. _

Uryu scraped his hand through his hair to draw it away from his face. He took a deep breath as he clasped the ribbons to his chest before letting them evaporate into the air. He stared out of the window, which Ichigo seemed to have smashed to gain access, watching as the white light balanced across the jagged edges of glass. "Kurosaki, let's leave Karakura Town," he said finally.

"Eh? Leave?"

"Ryuken won't give up."

Ichigo suddenly hugged him from behind again, his arms rough enough to make Uryu wince. "Then I'll beat him up."

The brash overconfidence that had always exasperated Uryu. And why did Ichigo continue to be like this when Uryu had told him countless times that he was an _idiot._

"I _hate_ it when you speak like that, Kurosaki! Convinced you can beat anything and it's not fair because it's going to get you killed! Why don't you think of yourself? Or how the rest of us feel when you charge into sudden death? Ryuken could kill you. He could torture you."

_Like he did to me. Chasing me relentlessly in the dark. And to think of him doing that to you and hurting you..._

And knowing that Uryu wouldn't be able to do anything... because he was nothing against Ryuken.

"You can't beat him," said Uryu, "and he'll never leave us alone now he knows about this. Us. We have to leave. Before he really does find a cure."

"There's no guarantee there is a cure, Ishida. You hate it when I charge in, but I hate it when you worry. All the damn time about everything. And it's not like you to jump to rash solutions like running away. Do you think Rukia and the others wouldn't find us? Honestly? We need to find a better way to deal with this. We're not running away. It's a stupid idea."

"It's not stupid, Kurosaki! You have no idea what Ryuken is like! And it's not just him, everyone is against us! Sado-kun, Inoue-san, Kuchiki-san, Urahara-san, they pretend to be civil but they're plotting and you know it because we would be doing the same thing in their situation!"

"You're ranting. Stop it. Discounted."

"Don't discount me!"

Ichigo slammed his arms either side of Uryu, one flat against the wall and the other against the edge of the window frame. "_Discounted!_ My dad said he didn't have a problem with vampires providing we keep our heads. And you seem to be losing yours, Ishida, so it seems it's me who has to be smart for once."

"We're _leaving_, Kurosaki!" Uryu tried to shove Ichigo's arm away, but Ichigo grabbed his wrist in a grip that Uryu couldn't shake. Even worse, it was clearly no effort on Ichigo's part to hold Uryu with one hand.

"No. We're not," said Ichigo. "We're going home. To my house. I came here because it was closer and it was safe, and I didn't want to worry Yuzu and Karin. But now you're awake, we're going home."

"No. I'm not backing down. Because I'm still the smart one and-"

Ichigo suddenly picked Uryu up with one arm and threw him over his shoulder. "We're going home."

_"Put me down!"_

Uryu thumped him hard. And then kicked him. And it was utterly pointless against a beast like Ichigo. He didn't even give a huff of discomfort.

_I'm weak._

Uryu had to grit his teeth hard. He hated being carried. And yet loved it because it was Ichigo. And somehow that made him hate everything even more. Especially Ryuken, because if Ryuken had his way then Ichigo wouldn't hold him like this.

They had to leave town. Ichigo was too trusting. Too used to the idea that everything will work out.

_Maybe if you'd lived my horrible life you'd be a bit more realistic._

"Kick all you want, Uryu. And don't tell me not to use your name. I'll use it if I damn well want to." Ichigo jumped through the window, stepping into the night air as solidly as if he'd stepped onto an invisible pavement.

Uryu pulled their entwined ribbons into his hands, wondering if Ichigo would fall flat on his face in surprise if he yanked on it hard enough.

"Don't sulk," said Ichigo grumpily. "And stop plotting. I can feel it when you manhandle those ribbons you know. There are some things I'm better at. And some things you're better at. That's why we've always been a good team. And why I've always put up with you even when you pissed me off."

Uryu kicked him. Even though Ichigo didn't seem to care or feel it. He clutched the ribbons hard, wrapping them around his neck and pressing them to his mouth. "Why do you have to do this? Why do you insist on being 'rational' now when it's never been in your personality repertoire before?"

"Maybe your nagging after all these years finally got to me. It's how you wanted me to be."

Not really. Uryu had always lamented that Ichigo was so hotheaded. And worried about it in the evenings. And yet it had always been somehow alluring because it was everything Uryu wanted. A happy grin. The confidence to do anything.

And Uryu had a feeling he'd always wanted those things because they seemed to make life easier for Ichigo where as nothing had ever been easy for Uryu. It had changed when he'd been bitten. And yet somehow Ichigo suddenly felt like a chain around him, preventing Uryu from enjoying these things as much as he should.

"I thought you liked being like this with me, Kurosaki? Us as vampires. Why should we even bother trying to appease the others? People should do what they want, no matter the consequences. Those who take actions simply to please others are pathetic. Nobody has made an effort to accept us so why should we make any effort to reassure them that we're the same men we used to be? We're not the same. I _hate_ who I used to be and the idea of ever going back sickens me. If anybody tries to drag me back then I'll hate them and I'll fight them. And I'll kill Ryuken because he has _no_ right to interfere with me now after doing nothing for me for seventeen years."

"He's your father."

"Did your father hug you when your mother died? Ryuken never hugged me. Not once. He locked himself in his study and ignored me. Sensei had to look after me. And then he died. And Ryuken still never hugged me once! He is not my father!"

Uryu heard his voice echo across the moonlight and he clenched his fist at how loud it sounded. He hadn't intended to shout. And yet it always happened without him realising when Ryuken was around.

"I'm hugging you now," said Ichigo softly.

"No, you're dragging me kicking and screaming. I'm not backing down. We're leaving."

"Shut up. And let me take you home. And we'll talk about things. With dad too. He hugs me sometimes and I know we can trust him. He won't let your dad in the house."

"Stop using that word."

Ichigo rubbed Uryu's back. "You need to calm down."

_Calm down? You mean you're going to try and rationalise with me to talk me out of this? Sorry, Kurosaki. That Ishida Uryu is long dead._


	14. Chapter 14

**Another update! See, I'm good when I'm not moving house or cosplaying! As always, thank you so much to the reviewers : ) As a thank you, I am respecting various wishes. People have asked for more Ryuken so here he is... Someone a while ago also asked to see the Shinigami so I will see what I can do in that area for you in a later chapter. We're not far from the end of this story though...**

**Who's up to date with the manga? Because since some of the past of Ryuken and Isshin (and the deaths of their wives) is now canon, I've included it here. Sorry... I realise there may be spoilers for those who haven't read it yet... sorry...**

* * *

_You're home._

Isshin let out the slow breath he'd been holding as the silhouette appeared at Ichigo's bedroom window, blocking the moonlight that had been falling across Isshin's knees as he sat waiting at Ichigo's writing desk. "I was about to come looking for you," said Isshin. "Don't look in the closet downstairs. I've hid my gigai in there."

Ichigo jumped down onto the laminate flooring. Uryu was draped over his shoulder. Isshin thought he was unconscious at first until he saw Uryu press his fist into Ichigo's back. "You can unhand me now, Kurosaki. This is embarrassing."

Ichigo did as he was told and Uryu, dressed in his rumpled school uniform, tottered on trembling legs for a moment. Seemingly not wanting to even look at Isshin, he retreated into the shadows at the far end of the room, slumping against the wall. Ichigo stared after him with a look that Isshin hadn't seen on his face since Masaki had died.

Isshin cleared his throat. "I'm glad you're both home. Karin and Yuzu were worried when you took off like that, Ichigo. Worried about Uryu too since I think they were looking forward to seeing the both of you together. Yuzu left your dinner in the fridge. You should eat before you go to bed."

"Thanks dad."

Uryu slowly slid to the floor, balancing his head in right hand. A finger of moonlight brushed against the silver bracelet hanging from his wrist casting a tiny star-shaped shadow across the room. Ichigo pulled the duvet from his bed. Dropping to the floor beside Uryu, he wrapped the duvet around him. Uryu pulled it over his head. He was so still that it was almost as if he wasn't there at all. Ichigo hugged him.

"Dad, if Ishida's dad comes here, you'll tell him to leave, won't you?"

Ah... that explained Uryu's behaviour. It had only been a matter of time before that man found out.

"I promised I'd protect you both. Whatever it takes. Are you hurt?"

"No."

"Good."

Isshin left them to it. Sometimes fathers had a job to do. And sometimes they could do nothing at all because there were times when you had to stand on the sidelines, whether you wanted to or not. Sitting in his Shinigami form downstairs pretending to read the morning's newspaper, he didn't say a word when Ichigo appeared a few minutes later to take the dinner plates from the fridge up to his room. Eating was good. It would help to make them feel better. And reassure Isshin somewhat that maybe all of this was still salvageable.

For a long time Isshin was still. He'd guessed Ryuken might be involved. When Uryu hadn't arrived home, he'd called Kisuke, with Ichigo breathing over his shoulder. Kisuke hadn't known anything. And of course Ichigo had panicked and left the house. As soon as Isshin had called the hospital and been told Ryuken was unavailable, he'd buried his head in his hands.

_You choose to get involved at the worst possible moments. _

This was delicate. Ichigo and Uryu were already jumpy. And anything could send the pair of them over the edge. With Soul Society's help, Isshin could possibly track them down if they fled, but it was a situation he'd rather avoid. In case he couldn't find them.

But if things carried on like this, they would flee. Uryu didn't seem like the kind of boy to hide under a duvet. But Ichigo was the kind of man to protect him no matter what it took.

After some time had passed, Isshin tiptoed up the stairs and paused outside of Ichigo's bedroom. He didn't really want to listen too closely (because he knew what vampires were like and what teenagers were like and he _didn't _need to know what these two were really like) but the room seemed quiet. No clatter of plates or chopsticks or voices. So with any luck the two of them were asleep.

Treading back downstairs, he passed through the living room and into the clinic beyond. No patients had needed to stay the night so the building was empty. He chose to sit in the room at the furthest point away from the house before drawing the mobile phone from his pocket. He dialled the number and waited.

"So, I hear you've found about the good news," he said, as the call connected. Even in Shinigami form, this person would hear his voice. "Soon, our families will be one and-"

Ryuken hung up.

"Ah… I knew you'd do that."

Isshin had never been sure exactly what their relationship was. Friends? Comrades? Or simply two men thrown together by mutual pain? Isshin didn't dislike many people. Ryuken was possible the most unlikeable human he'd ever encountered and Isshin still didn't dislike him. On the contrary, there was something oddly likeable about sitting with him. Sometimes talking. Mostly trying to annoy him (because it had always been fun to annoy people and Ryuken was the holy grail in that respect).

When they'd first met all those years ago, they'd spoken briefly during the whole Masaki/Hollow incident, but they hadn't gotten to know each other. Isshin had learnt a lot from Masaki though, and at times she'd blabbered on about Ryuken so much that Isshin had had to ask if she was marrying the right man.

But Ryuken had never contacted either of them. And it had been fine. Masaki had cried a little (when she thought Isshin couldn't hear her) but Isshin was certain she knew why Ryuken had cut ties. He'd liked her a lot. And she'd liked him, but not perhaps as much as Ryuken would have liked. So it was easier for him to remove her from his life rather than have to watch her with someone else.

"And it's much better this way anyway," Masaki had always said, "arranged marriages are never for the best. It would have been OK, I suppose, but never completely right for either of us. And there was a girl who adored him so much. And I know he adored her, and he would have done anything for her just like he had done for me. She was a maid, but I hope the family accept it."

It was only after Masaki died that Isshin had tried to get in touch, but it had been impossible because every time Isshin had showed up at the hospital or called, Ryuken wasn't there. And the staff had seemed antsy about something. He'd left messages but Ryuken hadn't showed up at the funeral.

Isshin had been angry enough to kill him at first because even if you cut all ties, there were times you had to show respect. But he'd had Ichigo, Karin and Yuzu, and far more important things to deal with than Ryuken, particularly as Ichigo had started distancing himself more and more from the family.

But eventually Ryuken had shown up. Completely unannounced during clinic hours one rain-filled Tuesday, with water dripping from his suit and his hair all over the place as he struggled to catch his breath. "Masaki. Is she all right?" he'd roared across the busy waiting room as Isshin saw a patient out.

He'd taken him aside quietly. "I left you a message. She was killed by a Hollow three weeks ago."

It had never seemed right. Masaki could defend herself from Hollows and from what Ichigo said it seemed that there hadn't been any kind of battle. She couldn't have been taken out so easily. _Shouldn't have._ Isshin had spent a lot of time with Kisuke, but they'd been unable to come up with any other explanation and Isshin had had to accept that.

Ryuken had come to the clinic that day because he'd found out there was more to the situation than that. His wife, Katagiri, had fallen unconscious the same day. And other Quincies had died too. It couldn't be a coincidence.

For the next several weeks, they'd worked together with Kisuke to uncover as much of the truth as they could and, painfully, that there was nothing they could do about it. But there would come a day when they would be able to reach the ones responsible. Isshin could cope with that.

At first, Isshin had envied Ryuken because Katagiri was still alive, but he'd soon realised that was wrong. Masaki was gone and Isshin was learning to accept that. It was difficult but life went on and she'd kill him if he brooded too much and neglected their children. Katagiri was in a coma, neither alive nor dead. The more Isshin, Kisuke and Ryuken had researched, the more they discovered that she was unlikely to ever wake up, particularly as illnesses had always hit her hard. And Ryuken was unable to grieve. And unable to accept anything.

There had been many late nights for all three around that time. Isshin had always made sure he was at home as frequently as he could, but he knew Ryuken travelled around the country a lot, searching specific areas where there was a weak bond between the world of the living and the dead as he searched for a way to reach the ones responsible.

Isshin had stopped by the hospital as frequently as he could (which wasn't often when you had three young, grieving children) to ask politely how Katagiri was doing and to see Ryuken, if he was around. They hadn't always spoken as Isshin had sat on the couch in Ryuken's office while the other man scribbled away at whatever he was doing. But even in the silence there had been some comfort.

Hours spent together. In silence. Or sometimes talking about Masaki and Katagiri. And planning revenge for when the day came.

Isshin would never forget the day that Katagiri had died. Ryuken had seemed all right while she'd been in a coma. Calm and collected as he bided his time for when he could have revenge. Isshin had seen nothing wrong with that.

He'd been sitting quietly with a book in Ryuken's office when the pager alert came for Ryuken to tell him that his wife had succumbed. Ryuken had told Isshin he could leave, but silently Isshin had walked beside him anyway to the private room on the third floor of the hospital.

Nurses clustered outside the room. Two in tears, which Isshin had noted at the time seemed odd for nurses who were exposed to this sort of scene all the time. He only realised a few seconds later what had probably led to them being upset. A dark-haired boy running through the doors with tears on his face.

"What's wrong with you? You couldn't even be here when mother died! Why were you never here? _I hate you!_ You ignore her and everything else! You won't look at Hollows. You won't look at people being killed. You wouldn't look at her and _you won't look at me!"_

An eight year old boy screaming and sobbing in the middle of the hospital corridor.

_Hollows...?_

"Uryu! Don't!" An old man staggered from the room, but the boy had already thrown himself at Ryuken's legs, kicking, screaming, sobbing and punching. "I hate you. _I hate you!"_

And Ryuken; pressing his hand against the boy's head to shove him backwards onto before turning his back and walking away down the corridor.

"Ryuken!" the old man gasped as he caught Uryu, bundling him tightly in his arms as he screamed even harder. "Ryuken! You're not the only one who's hurting! What's more important? The truth you can't reach or something that's right in front of your eyes!"

"R-Ryuken...?" Isshin could only stare, his dry mouth gaping.

That boy... small, skinny. And a face _exactly_ like Katagiri's. And somehow also exactly like Ryuken's.

_"I hate him, I hate him, I hate him!"_ the boy screamed.

Isshin sprinted after Ryuken down the corridor. "Ryuken! That's your son?! _You have a son?"_

_You never mentioned him!_

Not once in all the hours Isshin had spent sitting in the hospital with Ryuken during the past two months or that they'd spent investigating the truth behind Masaki's death and Katagiri's illness. And during those times Isshin had still spent as much time as he could with his kids, but he knew there were times when Ryuken hadn't gone home at all. Sometimes for days on end.

Isshin had suddenly seen a completely different side to him as he saw behind that calm nature. This man had fallen apart completely the moment Katagiri had collapsed.

"Ryuken...!" Isshin grabbed his arm, but Ryuken punched him in the face.

"If you go anywhere near Uryu I'll kill you! I don't want him to have anything to do with Quincy, Shinigami, Hollows! Any of that! He's bad enough as it is already! I will deal with all of this so he doesn't have to."

He'd left Isshin dazed in the corridor with a bleeding nose. And further behind, Uryu and his tears.

_Too overwhelmed by your own grief to attend to others. _

And Isshin knew Ryuken had cried somewhere for a very, very long time that day.

Isshin had gone home and finally he'd had the guts to confront Ichigo. He'd hugged him hard, along with Karin and Yuzu. And they'd all cried.

He'd been just as bad as Ryuken. He had seen his children but he'd also spent a lot of time away. Too much of a coward to admit that Ichigo wasn't coping.

And as much as he'd felt for poor Uryu screaming in the hospital, there was nothing he could do. Because he had his own family to keep together. And besides that, Uryu could see Hollows and he was a Quincy.

Quincy absorbed reishi rather than emit them, but there was definitely an odd feeling of reiatsu around ones that had not mastered their abilities. Isshin had felt it from Masaki when he'd first met her. And it was the same from this boy.

Ichigo could see ghosts, but he hadn't mentioned Hollows. And there had been no signs of any Quincy abilities or odd reiatsu. Isshin had wanted to keep it that way. Introducing him to Uryu would have introduced him to Hollows and Quincy, and it would have awakened something in Ichigo. Those with spiritual powers are affected by others around them with similar abilities and they will amplify one another.

_And it's better if neither of you develop those abilities._

He'd stopped visiting Ryuken. And he'd tried to blank Uryu from his mind because it was too horrible to think about, especially when he heard that his grandfather died a few months later. Isshin had always admitted he was a coward. And he was too much of a coward to get involved with that family.

He'd been happy when Ichigo brought Uryu home from school with him that day. The joy at seeing that Uryu had survived everything somehow.

It had been too late to worry about his effect on Ichigo since he'd already become a Shinigami. Uryu's appearance only solidified the fact that things would never be the same again for Isshin's family. So Isshin had welcomed him. And tried to look after him to make up for the guilt that he'd felt at being able to do nothing as that boy's life, and the life of one of Masaki's dear friends, had fallen apart.

* * *

Arriving at the hospital (because even though it was late, Ryuken would be here since Isshin knew he spent as little time as possible in that big empty house of his), Isshin leapt through the air to Ryuken's office. Through the glass, he saw the glow of the table lamp. Ryuken's white head bent low as he peered at the laptop in front of him.

Isshin banged on the window.

Ryuken ignored him.

So Isshin smashed it with his zanpaktou. He cleared his throat as he awkwardly stepped through the frame, trying to look cool and collected even as his robes caught on the remaining shards of glass, tripping him over and causing him to fall flat on his face on the carpet.

"I'll send the bill to your house," said Ryuken, not even glancing up as his fingers danced across the keyboard.

Isshin stood, trying to smile as he brushed the glass from his robes. he hadn't really thought about what he was going to say when he got here and that was a mistake because you always needed to prepare yourself to deal with this man. Should he shout at him for getting involved because what he'd done was _completely_ idiotic? But Ryuken would just walk away. And then secretly quiver inside at the thought of losing Uryu forever.

This man was a wreck. The cold exterior was a method of hiding that. One little push would no doubt be enough to have him reaching for a noose to hang himself with.

That was why Isshin liked to wind him up. It was better than actually making Ryuken face his true self, because Isshin was pretty sure Ryuken wouldn't be able to cope with that. And neither would Uryu. Ryuken either made the boy hate him or he fell apart. Nobody should have to see their parent fall apart.

"Sooooooo..." Isshin thought of the best way to proceed. "Have you picked out your suit for the wedding?"

Ryuken shot him. Isshin didn't even see him move, let alone get his bow out. And God only knows how he managed to duck. Sweat rolled from his armpits. _"That's frickin' dangerous!"_

Ryuken was staring at the laptop again, his fingers clattering across the keys. he had that tight look on his face. the look that said threatened to kill anyone who bothered him.

"It's not that bad you know!" said Isshin. "Some boys like boys and it's not the end of the world. And it's Ichigo! My son is an amazing catch! Girls and boys alike right now will be weeping because-"

Ryuken was suddenly standing directly in front of him with the blue reishi blade of a seele schneider only an inch from Isshin's Adam's apple, which had started to bob up and down frantically.

"Vampires," said Ryuken. "Research on the supernatural is available if you know where to look. Those boys have been diseased and their deluded and sickening infatuation with one another is merely a symptom. What..." Ryuken paused for a moment as if he had an unpalatable taste in his mouth as he tried to find the right word, "… _interests_ me most though, Isshin, is that the first one to be bitten will have had a choice in his partner. He could have chosen from anyone in the world. But once the choice was made, the other party would have no say in the matter because the bond will have been made. _And I know damn well this will have been started by your son!"_

It had always been a bit of dangerous fun in recent years when Isshin had started to visit Ryuken again (mainly to update him on what Ichigo and Uryu were up to because Isshin had needed someone else who was a parent to talk at about these things). And he felt that Ryuken needed someone to elicit some kind of life in him.

Uryu was and wasn't Ryuken's favourite subject. It was the only subject that ever provoked a reaction from him or introduced a glimmer of emotion to his grey eyes. Whenever Isshin slipped alcohol into his coffee, the reaction was a total sobbing breakdown that resulted in manly hugs. But Isshin always forgot how quick the man was and how much the reishi vibrations hurt as the proximity of the blade buzzed across his skin.

Of course, Isshin knew he _wouldn't…_

Thought he _wouldn't…_

_You really wouldn't would you?_

Because he still had that 'Ryu-chan' image in his head that Masaki had always painted.

_And good god had she got it wrong. _

Isshin tried to grin. Grins were good at diffusing tension after all. "Why are you blaming Ichigo?"

_"Because it's his fault!"_

The blue blade humming closer until Isshin swore it was going to draw blood. _He's pissed. He's seriously pissed!_

"They've always been friends! Always arguing like man and wife! And Uryu's always around our house…" Sewing Yuzu's dress for her. Nagging Ichigo like he was his wife. And Uryu did have that kind of pretty look (_and Ryuken, I know damn well he's had long girly hair since he was eight and at eight years old, kids don't pick their own hair so you or Katagiri picked it for him!)._ And he liked cooking and cleaning. _You seriously telling you didn't think at some point that he might not be straight?_

Saying any of that would have resulted in blood. And Isshin was a coward. "They get along well! So why is it Ichigo's fault?"

_"Because it just is!"_

"All right, all right! Maybe it is his fault! I apologise on his behalf!"

_Sorry Ichigo, my son. But if I don't say this then I'm going to lose my head. Not that I'm blaming you..._

Even though Ichigo had been the one to do the biting, apparently...

The seele schneider was suddenly withdrawn from his neck. Isshin tried not to let his breath of relief sound as loud as it felt as Ryuken twirled the silver hilt around his fingers and slid it into his belt beneath his doctor's coat (Isshin wondered if he walked around the hospital with them). Straightening his tie, Ryuken sat again at his desk. The glow of his laptop screen was reflected in his glasses.

Isshin stretched his arms as he walked over to the couch in front of Ryuken's desk.

"Don't," said Ryuken. "I didn't invite you to sit. I'm very busy. Leave. I don't have the patience for you today."

Isshin paused, his legs bent and his backside poised ready to rest smack bang in the middle of the red leather sofa. He stared at Ryuken, who had lifted his eyes from the screen to meet this stare, daring him to defy him.

Isshin straightened. "I assumed you'd be in a good mood. I mean, you had your beloved son all to yourself for a good few hours. You must have injected him with something..."

"Nothing I tried worked. I took some blood samples and I know that no medicine in the world of the living is going to fix this. Although there could be a potential opportunity to exploit a protein string..." Ryuken was staring at the screen again.

"Soul Society have agreed to help," said Isshin.

"Because it is in their own interest to restore your son since he is their guard dog. I don't trust them." He practically spat every word.

_You hate them because you think they could have done something to prevent Masaki and Katagiri's deaths all those years ago. You think they didn't care because it was just a bunch of Quincy that died._

He was probably right.

"Kisuke is with them. He'll make sure that both Ichigo and Uryu are cured. In fact, Kisuke wanted me to ask you something. I didn't just come here to see your beautiful face, you know. Kisuke says you managed to hide Uryu's presence from Ichigo. How?"

"You wouldn't understand if I told you."

"Can you write it down so I can give it to Kisuke?"

"No. It's a Quincy technique. I'm not giving it to him. He's always been curious about the Quincy. Always trying to drag techniques out of me to add to his own repertoire of bastardised science."

Isshin planted his hands on Ryuken's desk. "We need to know how to do it. Kisuke wants to use it to hide his reiatsu from Ichigo and Uryu. Otherwise he'll never get close enough to them."

"Close enough to do what?"

"What do you think? Or would you rather your son remained a vampire?"

Ryuken leaned back in his chair. "You have a cure?"

"It's not ready yet. Kisuke just wants to be ready."

"What an evil father. Sheltering them and pretending to be on their side when you are secretly plotting against them."

"You knew they were staying with me? Have you got Uryu bugged or something? I offered them protection and I keep my word. No one will be allowed to set foot in that house, including you. Somebody had to be sympathetic. You said research on vampires is available if you know where to look. Look again and you'll see that they have a habit of disappearing. We're lucky that Ichigo and Uryu haven't already eloped. I didn't think they'd come home today after what you pulled. You have spoken to me, you know, to get the situation. You pretend you haven't got it but you do have my phone number!"

"I simply past them in the car. Flaunting themselves in the middle of the street."

"They're happy. Did you see the look on Uryu's face?"

_It's the first time I've seen him smile. How about you? Do you even remember what it feels like to be happy?_

"It's not real. Uryu's body is completely overrun with a substance that shouldn't be there and it is affecting how he thinks. Something like that can never be good. he's lost his reason. And it won't be long before it gets him killed."

Isshin had wanted to believe that it might be all right to leave them, though of course he'd never been able to do that. Because they were different to how they'd been before. And they would be prone to doing stupid things.

"I had to give them a place to stay, whether it was backhanded or not," said Isshin. "Sometimes we fathers are cruel to be kind and kind to be cruel. But we always have their best interests at heart. I'm thinking of both of them. I'd appreciate it if you thought of Ichigo, Masaki's son, too. We can't separate them. And we can't cure one and not the other. They have to be cured at the same time. Don't kidnap Uryu again."

"You're saying I should snatch both of them next time?"

"Good luck. They're a formidable duo. You know that. You can't work alone. I can't work alone. So let's team up. With Kisuke too. And Ichigo and Uryu's friends. No others from Soul Society."

Ryuken picked up a pen and began writing on a notepad. Filling one page, he turned to the next. Several pages later, he ripped them out and handed them to Isshin. "That is how I did it."

"Cheers." Isshin glanced at briefly. _Your handwriting is terrible._ He tucked it inside his Shinigami robes and then leaned slightly so that his back was to Ryuken. "Say, Ryuken, what happens after they are cured?"

"Back to reality."

"I always knew my son looked at the waiters rather than the waitresses." He'd tried to ignore it. And he'd sat in front of Masaki's grave debating the issue. She'd have accepted it. She accepted everything weird. And she'd want Isshin to accept it. And maybe it could be fun to have a gay son.

"How about you, Ryuken?"

_Did you even pay enough attention to notice?_

No answer. Maybe it was OK for Isshin to think like this. Having one gay child was fine when you had two others that could be potentially straight enough to provide grandchildren (though surrendering his girls... he wanted to cry inside). Ryuken only had Uryu.

"We can raise them how we want, but we can't choose how they turn out. Some things are programmed so deeply that we can't change them."

Despite the sewing and the cooking, Issin had no clue about Uryu. He'd noted that Ichigo looked at him. Looked at him more than he'd ever looked at Inoue Orihime (and how could he not look?) or Kuchiki Rukia. Only from time to time, mind, and there had been nothing definitive in the look. But Uryu... he'd never noted him staring at boys. He'd actually seen him glance at Orihime once or twice. But even once or twice still wasn't normal. Most boys looked at her all the time because she was a stunning girl.

"Uryu will turn out in a way that spitefully defies everything I ever intended for him," said Ryuken. "I have no doubt."

"And you'll be proud of him no matter what, even though you'll never admit it. How can you not be proud. He's a good boy. They both are."

The office was quiet. Ryuken's fingers not even tapping on the laptop keys anymore. Isshin didn't dare turn to face him. Ryuken didn't like people looking at him. But sometimes if you spoke to him in this way, you'd get closer to his true thoughts. And sometimes Isshin could use it to give him office without fear of getting killed.

"Ryuken… I have never told you how to be a parent. I don't have a clue myself and I've been such a coward never telling Ichigo anything. Even when he got his Shinigami powers I buried my head in the sand. I can't do that this time. When Kisuke finds that cure, we have to be ready for the consequences. neither of us can be bothered by them. And neither of us will really know what to do. And somehow we'll have to muddle through."

"They'll have their common sense back. What little they had to begin with anyway. if they have sense then that is all they need."

Of course that was how Ryuken would reply. Because he didn't really have emotions anymore.

"Ryuken, do you have any idea how much it will hurt?"

"It won't hurt. they'll go back to how they were. They won't feel anything for one another anymore."

"It's not going to be that simple."

Ryuken was typing at the laptop again. Perhaps it was the scientific vampire research he'd spoken off. Or more likely it was administrative work for the hospital. Or maybe he was just tapping across the keyboard to give himself an excuse to avoid looking at Isshin.

_And to avoid thinking about Uryu._

And Isshin had let him get away with it on so many occasions. Mention Uryu, and Ryuken would get angry. And then he'd retreat into nothingness; tapping at his laptop or flicking through the pages of a book. Something. Anything.

Isshin knew it was difficult for him because Uryu was a male replica of his mother. Every time Ryuken looked at him he was reminded of the wife he had lost. Isshin was reminded of Masaki every time he looked at his kids because they all had something about her in their appearance. But how would it feel if one of them looked exactly like her? And if all Isshin could see was Masaki rather than their child? He liked to think he wouldn't just focus on that...

_But we're never as idealistic as we want to be._

People grieved. And some could never forget. It wasn't Uryu's fault, and resenting him was wrong.

_But we're only human._

"Ryuken, we're both going to have a job to do when this is over. I don't know what they're going to feel like when they're no longer vampires, but they'll still have to cope with the memory of what it felt like to be utterly besotted with one another. And it's going to hurt. The emotions are going to hurt. The confusion is going to hurt. And I don't want to deal with it. I really don't. And since neither do you, maybe we should leave them be. They'll never be happier."

Ryuken looked up from the screen. "Don't be ridiculous. If you won't cure them then I will. There is no cure in the world of the living. But I will find something."

"Uryu will cry."

"He's always cried. Once more won't kill him."

"You're so cold."

"It's better than pretending nothing is wrong, Kurosaki Isshin."

He was right. Ryuken was always right, even if his methods could be a little more delicate. Isshin sighed. "Then it's decided. When this is over, I'm going to hug Ichigo. And punch him in the arm. And take him to the cinema. And then give him a bit of pocket money to take Uryu to the cinema perhaps. What will you do?"

No reply.

_Because you don't have a clue._

Isshin wouldn't have a clue either but when you don't have a clue you laugh and you grin and you grab someone in a bear hug. Because you are reminding someone of what it's like to be happy, even if it feels as if they will never be happy again themselves.

Isshin had left Uryu in that hospital crying. And he'd let Ryuken walk away from it. He should have shouted. Shaken the man. Demanded that he hug his son and stop being so selfish. It wasn't his place to do that and he was pretty certain it would have made no difference since the damage to that father/son relationship had probably been done years ago.

And he was a coward. Fearing Ryuken's reaction. Because Isshin needed Ryuken in his life because he was one of the few connections he had left with Masaki.

So he'd never told him off about Uryu or made him feel guilty.

But he couldn't let him just walk away this time.

"If you want to cure Uryu then make sure you're brave enough to take the consequences." Isshin took a deep breath, telling himself to be a man for once and to say what needed saying. And to trust Ryuken to be man enough to take it. "Don't leave that poor boy crying alone again like you did before when his mother died."

A long silence. Isshin couldn't even hear Ryuken breathing, as if the man's heart had stopped there and then.

And then the laptop being thrown across the room and three haggard words trembling from Ryuken's lips.

"Get... out... _Now!"_

* * *

**I actually think it's likely that Solken, Uryu's grandfather, was killed the same day as Masaki. But that would put the death in June. And for this story, I've already written that he died in Autumn so I'll have to leave it at that...**


	15. Chapter 15

**I promised you a Shinigami... have a Shinigami! **

**Kurai - don't die! ) Thank you all for the reviews. So pleased everyone liked Ryuken and Isshin. They're fun to write. **

* * *

"Ichigo! Hey, Ichigo! Is it true that you're gay? For real? I mean, seriously?"

Ichigo grimaced. He'd been aware of the sound of his name being called for sometime as he tried to focus on the Japanese lesson and the new text Mazada-sensei was droning on about. He had a feeling Renji had been shouting it the second he entered the school grounds, though at least he'd had the sense to come in Shinigami form rather than in a gigai dressed in some ridiculous fashion (none of the Shinigami really had any clue about modern day fashion - and frankly it was embarrassing whenever they turned up at school).

Ichigo had really been hoping that Renji wouldn't be able to find him since he was in a different classroom to the last time Renji had visited, but of course he should have known better.

"Ichigo! Come on, what's going on?" Renji was perched on the windowsill two desks away, practically bouncing up and down as he spoke. Any moment he was probably going to come lumbering up to Ichigo's desk.

"Turn to page forty two," said Mazada-sensei. "Inoue-san, you can start the reading."

"Uh? Ah..." Across the class, Orihime frantically leafed through the book as she tried hard not to stare at Renji, who was grinning and waving as he saw her eyes briefly dart in his direction. "Ah... Ok then..." She started to read.

"Hey Ichigo!"

_Here he comes..._

Renji grinned as he leaned across Ichigo's desk. His tattoos looked even more ridiculous as he arched his eyebrows. "So what's going on?"

Ichigo discretely scribbled a note inside his book. _School. Go away._

"Eh? Who cares about that. You bunk off all the time. Hey, Rukia! You come as well! And Inoue!"

"And then I-... ah... he... Ah... I've lost my place..." Orihime murmured, her cheeks blushing pink as she stared hard at the book in her hands. In the seat beside her, Rukia held her book so that it was blocking Renji from her sight.

"Take your time, Inoue-san," said Mazada-sensei.

"Eh? You're all ignoring me? Well Ichigo, looks like it will be just me and you having a manly talk! Ichigo? Hey Ichigo! Don't be a bastard and blank me! Listen to me with that thick dandelion head of yours! Are you really gay? Are you and Ishida really banging one another?"

"Ah... ah..." Orihime was stumbling over her words again when she was only half way through the sentence she'd resumed a moment ago.

"Hey Ichigo!" Renji grabbed Ichigo's arm and shook it.

Ichigo put his hand up. "Sorry, Mazada-sensei. I don't feel well. Can I go to the bathroom?"

Normally the answer would be a firm no because students were supposed to go during break, but instead Mazada-san sighed with an exasperated heaviness. "Do whatever you please, Kurosaki-kun. As if any teacher in this school can stop you when it comes to skipping lessons. Just make sure your _good_ friend Ishida-kun helps you catch up. Because if you fail a single test in any of your subjects then you know full well you'll be told to leave given how much time you take off."

Sniggers chuckled around the class.

And Ichigo couldn't say a word. Because on so many occasions he had almost been kicked out of school because of how many classes he skipped. His only defence had been the fact that he was still passing every subject with grades that were at least a little above average (thank god for Uryu and the fact that he could be bribed to help you catch up if you offered to buy him lunch or dinner). Some of the teachers delighted in reminding him about the fine line he was walking, as if daring him to hit back with a retort.

It had always been the same for Ichigo so it wasn't hard not to take the bait. He didn't bleach his hair but everybody thought he did and, of course, when a teacher saw a student with bleached hair they instantly labelled them as trouble and sometimes they liked to try and find an excuse to justify their misguided instinct. Whether teachers did it out of frustration because some other student in another class had made their lives a misery or simply boredom, Ichigo didn't know, but it was something he'd had to cope with from the moment he'd first entered school. The best response was to say nothing. But the best response is not always the path you really, really want to choose.

Ichigo stood and packed his books into his bags. "I won't fall behind Mazada-sensei. Thank you for your concern. I'm sure I can find _some _way of convincing Ishida to help me with anything I want."

A collective 'oooooooooooo' went round the class and Mazada-sensei visibly cringed. "Out," he said simply.

"Don't get Ishida pregnant!" some guy Ichigo had forgotten the name of called before his friends hurriedly told him to shut up in case Ichigo beat him up.

Ichigo picked up his bag, ignoring the exaggerated sucking noises that the nameless moron who had called out before was now making. Other kids had never been something to worry about since Ichigo was pretty sure he could hit harder than any of them. And so could Uryu and Chad.

"ICHIGO! YOU REALLY ARE BANGING HIM?" said Renji, frantically leaping across the classroom as he followed Ichigo out into the corridor. "I thought it was a joke when Rukia told me! But you really have been doing him? You're really a vampire and you've been eating him? Is it really necessary to bang him and suck his blood? I mean, it's a bit kinky isn't it? Man, I didn't have you down for that sort of thing, though Ishida... they say it's always the quiet ones you should watch out for..."

Ichigo closed the classroom door. "Renji! What the hell is wrong with you? You can't just come to school and barge in! This is my final year and I can't screw it up!"

"Looks like you found something else to screw instead. But Ishida? Seriously?! You and Ishida...?! Damn... I lost my bet with Captain Kuchiki."

"What? You had a bet with Byakuya?"

"Yeah. Rukia told me about the vampire thing just before she went to the world of the living. And then she called me and told me you'd bit Ishida and made him your bitch. I thought she was having a laugh but I mentioned it to Captain Kuchiki and he seemed really pleased about it for some reason... no idea why... so I came to see if it was true! Almost everyone has a bet one way or the other. Looks like the Women's Association has had a pool going for a while about you being gay anyway and I think they were all betting to see which guy you'd do first."

"What?! You're joking, right?"

Though he probably wasn't. _Because most of you seem to have nothing better to do since you just leave all the Hollows in this town to me, Ishida and Urahara-san while you poke around having bets on someone's love life. Bunch of dead perverts..._

"Well, it's cool whatever you do, Ichigo. It's cool," said Renji. "though... it _is _weird. I mean, I know you used to go on all the time about his Quincy outfits but I didn't realise you were checking his ass out..." Renji paused. "I don't get it! Why would you check him out? He's a skinny nerd with a bit of a Shinigami-Quincy complex and he's a guy! Why not Inoue because everyone knows she has a fantastic pair? Or maybe Ru... No! Wait! What am I saying?" Renji suddenly grinned and slapped Ichigo on the shoulder. "Ha! It's cool, Ichigo! You should stay with the Quincy! I mean, there are photos of you two being sold around Soul Society, which I thought were fake until now, but if they're real then you must be pretty serious about each other so obviously you should stick to guys and absolutely stay away from girls! Absolutely!"

Ichigo was getting a bit lost as Renji rambled but he blinked as he traced back over some of the words. "There are pictures of me and Ishida being sold? Who's selling them?"

"Rukia. She sells the clothed ones for 600 yen and she's getting over 1300 for the topless shots. She's putting a book together called Hot Forbidden Vampire Yaoi from The World of the Living Starring the Substitute Shinigami and the Fabled Last Quincy. Or did she rename it? I think she was thinking of something simpler like Hot Boy Vampires Making Out. She says she just needs to finish airbrushing both yours and Ishida's spots out and then the book is ready to go."

_"Where the hell did she get topless shots of me and Ishida from?"_

Because Uryu would go mad if anyone else saw the scar on his chest. It would be like the Quincy's revenge on Soul Society. _And I honestly think he'd be good at something like that..._

In fact forget the scar; Uryu was going to go mad no matter what when he found out about this.

Ichigo started back to the classroom door. _Ye gods Rukia! I have enough trouble controlling him without you sending him off the rails!_

"Don't go back in that boring place. You can't blame her," said Renji. "Since everyone in your class knows it doesn't sound as if you've been very mature about hiding your teenage urges. If you don't want something aired then maybe you should be a little more discrete. What happens if I see you both making out or something gross? I'm your pal and it would be utterly wrong!"

Ichigo turned and pointed at Renji. "I don't have to explain any of this to you! Yes, Ishida and I are a couple so get over it! I guess you don't understand because a concept like this is too mature for your little mind to cope with."

"What did you just say, dandelion head?"

"You heard you stupid red pineapple!"

"Hey! I changed my hair! It's not a pineapple anymore!"

"Once a pineapple, always a pineapple!"

"Better a pineapple than a blood sucking bum sucker!"

"Don't knock it until you've tried it. Though you haven't tried anything even close have you, Renji? Are the boys and girls of Soul Society not keen on fruit?"

"Of course they are! Just you wait!"

"Pineapple head!"

"Gay vampire!"

"_Stupid_ pineapple head!"

"Blood sucking Quincy fu..." Renji suddenly paused. "Hey. Ishida's always been precious about his weird Quincy clothes, right? Doesn't he get mad if you like spill blood on them or anything?"

"So, you want all the details then, Renji? When I bite him, Ishida actually-"

"_Stop right there, right now!_ I don't wanna know! I just don't wanna know!"

* * *

Back in the classroom, Rukia grimaced, trying to fight the urge to exchange a look with Orihime, who was still trying to read from the book with the reddest cheeks Rukia had ever seen.

Mazada-sensei sighed heavily. "Looks like Kurosaki-kun is going through one of those phases of shouting at himself again."

* * *

Uryu had only come to school because Ichigo had dragged him. Literally. Uryu had refused to get out of bed, but it had been fun as Ichigo pulled him out of the covers and forced him into his school uniform in between Uryu trying to bite him and pin him to the bed.

_"Ishida, give up. I'm stronger than you."_

_"No, you give up. Because I can't go to school now my uniform is covered in blood. So why bother?"_

_"Then you can wear one of mine! You're going to school. I am not letting you drop out!"_

But just because Uryu was at school didn't mean he had to go to classes (as if he'd ever live it down if his classmates saw him wearing this ridiculously baggy uniform - though he did like the fact that it smelled like Ichigo). He didn't want to become a dumb vampire, of course, but he was top of the school and he could already pass every mock exam with flying colours. So what else was there to learn? He'd never thought about it before but school was pointless. Maths, science, Japanese... most of now was so ludicrously complicated and niche that he'd probably never use it anyway in real life.

But Ichigo had refused to cut school. And if he was here then Uryu would stay here too to keep an eye on him. Classes would be far too boring but sewing was still something he enjoyed so instead he was in the handicraft club room tacking together the dress for Rukia. He didn't know if she'd still want it, but she'd given him the deposit so it would be dishonest to never make it. And it was a nice dress. Lots of gathers and a good shape. He didn't have any other commissions at the moment. And if she didn't want it then he'd make damn sure she paid for it anyway.

_I'm not going to let a Shinigami rip me off._

And maybe if he made her a dress just as good as any other dress he'd ever made then she might accept that it was OK for him to be a vampire because he was still the same person.

_Well, I don't remember ever cutting classes for reasons like this but that really doesn't matter. _

"Ishida-kun?"

He finished the line of tacking without looking up. He'd sensed Orihime's reiatsu long before she had actually opened the door to the handicrafts club room. Ichigo had told him to stay away from the others (ironic, since Ichigo had been the one calling Uryu paranoid last night), but Orihime was alone and as powerful as her ability was, it was mainly used for defence so she wasn't a threat to Uryu. Even so, he was wary as she closed the door behind her and moved closer to the table. He lowered his eyes, checking that she wasn't hiding anything in her hands, while at the same time putting the needle and thread down in case he needed to react quickly and grab his bow or a ginto tube.

Orihime smiled as she held her hands up. It was a nervous smile; the kind she gave when she really didn't want to smile at all. She gave a strained little laugh. "Um. Um. Um, honest I'm not going to do anything so please, please don't worry! You see, um, I heard someone say you weren't in classes but then someone else said they'd seen you this morning and I had sports for my next lesson but I forgot my kit anyway so I though instead of going to class and just getting into trouble I'd come and see if you were here in the handicrafts club room and if you were OK because I know yesterday must have been so horrible for you and I swear that none of us knew anything and it was such a big shock when your dad just left you at Urahara-san's shop because he didn't tell us or even say anything and we all decided we'd just wait for Kurosaki-kun to pick you up and we didn't do anything at all and I wanted to see you and say that I'm really sorry and that I really, really hope you're feeling better and that everything is OK with you and Kurosaki-kun and maybe if you're still sad then maybe I can make you a cake and we can all sit outside and eat it because it's nice outside at the moment now that it's a little warmer and the leaves are swirling around everywhere and do you remember that in Autumn we usually all go to the shrine together to look at the fallen leaves and we haven't done that this year so it would be really, really nice to go because I so badly want us to be friends again because Ishida-kun I-"

"I'm sorry," said Uryu. He placed his hand back on the fabric.

Orihime's smile vanished and then almost immediately it was back as she desperately tried to cover up the broken expression Uryu knew she really wanted to make. "E-eh? Um... well... we don't have to go and see the leaves together this year! I know things won't be the same and that it will take time but Ishida-kun I really, really miss you teaching me to sew and I miss our little talks together so please we have to be friends again because we've all been through so much-"

"Not about that. I'm sorry about what I said to you the other evening. I didn't mean it."

She stared. "E-eh?" And then paused. "Oh."

_"Kurosaki-kun, Kurosaki-kun, Kurosaki-kun! Remember Hueco Mundo? Don't think I didn't notice the fact that you were still screaming his name even when an Espada was tearing my arm off!"_

Uryu stared at the dress while Orihime was quiet. It was strange to remember everything he had said to her the other evening. Those words had been in his head ever since the fight with Ulquiorra, but it was something he had never let himself think about too much because it hadn't been her fault and there was nothing to blame her for.

_So why did I say it?_

And even though he had said those words she had brought herself before him and was apologising and trying her hardest to smile because she was the type of person who thought that a smile could solve all of the world's troubles. She was wrong of course, but it didn't change the fact that seeing her smile could make you forget, at least for a little while, how cold and miserable everything was because she really did have a beautiful smile.

But slowly her smile was fading as she stared at the floor thoughtfully. She was daft as a brush, but never stupid. Uryu didn't like silly girls but he had always liked her, even before they'd become as close as they were. In the handicrafts club she'd babbled a lot about rubbish, but then she'd also come out with expressions or thoughts that really meant something. And when she thought about things properly in a focused, sensible way, she usually got them right.

But seeing her think about something serious was one of the saddest things Uryu had ever seen. Orihime was bubbly and happy but when that expression was there she was thinking about how her imaginary, perfect world didn't fit with reality. Uryu hated seeing her like that, just like he hated it when Ichigo thought too hard and worried about something.

_Because it's me who over-analyses and worries. And compared to me you two have always seemed like the happiest people in the world and you give me a reason to still be here. Let me worry so that you can both smile and be silly._

She really was beautiful. She was fun and silly, but intelligent and thoughtful. Uryu had never let himself admit any of this to himself before because it would have been a one-way journey to a dead end with the echo of her calling Ichigo's name.

_But now it's you in that dead end who is hearing the echo of Kurosaki calling my name. _

And it would hurt her more because she loved Ichigo. Uryu hadn't loved her. He didn't think he was capable of loving anyone before becoming a vampire. But she'd definitely been more interesting than any other girl he'd ever known. Even so, he would have been happy to see her and Ichigo together. Perhaps he would have wondered about alternatives and what ifs, but those thoughts wouldn't have broken him (too late for that since other events had broken Uryu a long time ago).

_But you..._

Orihime sitting with that thoughtful look, still trying to smile because Uryu knew she wanted him to think she was all right.

_When actually you're dying inside. _

But she managed to smile. Uryu knew all of her smiles well and this one didn't seem the one she used to cover up what she was really feeling. She was smiling because she genuinely wanted to smile at him.

And for that expression alone Uryu wondered if it would have been possible after all for him to fall in love with her. Because it was amazing that she could smile and find the strength to be OK when Uryu had stolen her future from her. Everyone knew it should have been Orihime and Ichigo. People had always been talking about the school and asking if they were dating yet. Uryu had talked about it all of the time with Chad.

_Though I was never sure about what Kurosaki thought of you..._

That had often been a topic of conversation with Chad because Chad hadn't known either. _I'm not sure either way, but I think they'd be good together,_ Chad had always said.

"Ishida-kun," Orihime said softly, "it wasn't mean of you to say those things. It was true. I was worried about you in Hueco Mundo and it hurt to see you injured so badly. And if anything had happened to you I would have cried for so many days and nights. But I know that I was more preoccupied with Kurosaki-kun. And you know why, don't you, Ishida-kun?"

Vampires couldn't feel guilt. Uryu knew that because he'd known from the start that he should feel something. Even with Orihime standing here now, smiling so honestly while he knew she was feeling completely different inside, he couldn't summon that emotion.

"I know why," he said. "And I'm sorry, Inoue-san, because I can't regret or even apologise to you. It should be you in my place. I was convinced that Kurosaki would target you. That night he bit me, I spent it standing outside your apartment because I wanted to make sure that you and Kuchiki-san were safe. I was worried because I didn't want him to hurt you. Or to play with your emotions because I know how you feel about him."

"You're so sweet, Ishida-kun. You always have been sweet, though you always tried to hide it."

_Sweet? No, this time you are off the mark, Inoue-san._

Because Uryu remembered hating her after Ichigo had bitten him. And perhaps that underlying feeling would always be there. Knowing that it should be her and Ichigo together. And wondering if the only reason Ichigo had bitten Uryu was simply for convenience because he was the first person he'd managed to get alone.

"Inoue-san-"

Orihime stepped towards the table and smiled. "Ishida-kun, it's all right. You don't have to be jealous of me. And I know you are because I'd feel the same in your situation. You're worried because Kurosaki-kun is a boy and you're a boy, and the reason you say that it should have been me is because I'm a girl. But things don't always work out that way just because so many people in the world say it should be like that. It's more fun and interesting when people do unexpected things." Still smiling because she wanted to smile at him and yet Uryu knew she wanted to cry.

"Ishida-kun, I never stood a chance. Because you're a boy and I'm not, and Kurosaki-kun likes boys. Tatsuki always told me... we'd joke about it but I think she was really serious. It's OK though because I've always wanted Kurosaki-kun to be happy. And I've always wanted my friends to be happy too and I love seeing you happy, Ishida-kun because you look so different. As much as I wanted to, it never would have worked between me and Kurosaki-kun. Without this incident, maybe he wouldn't have realised in time what he liked. I was thinking of telling him after we left school that I really... and maybe we would have been together for a bit but in the end it wouldn't have worked because I'm a girl. And it would always have been you. Vampires are selfish and take what they want. That's what Urahara-san said. Kurosaki-kun chose you. And if it hadn't happened now then it would have happened later and we would have been in a right mess! So Ishida-kun, I think you've saved me from something horrible. And as much as it hurts now I know it'll be OK because Kurosaki-kun will be happy and you will be happy, and both of you and Sado-kun mean the world to me. And if Kurosaki-kun is going to be with anyone else then I'm so glad it's you and at least this way no other girl will ever have him either!"

She laughed, even though by now the tears were sliding down her face. It wasn't that nervous kind of laugh she usually gave either, but a real laugh. Genuinely happy with her conclusion of everything even though it had made her cry.

Before becoming a vampire, Uryu would have been terrified. Orihime had never cried in front of him. Sometimes she'd looked sad and he'd pat her a bit on the shoulder awkwardly but this required more than that. And weirdly he felt as if he knew what to do. He hugged her.

"You really are amazing. Thank you," he said.

_Almost stupidly kind, caring and unselfish. But it's still amazing. _

She seemed surprised but the longer he held her the more she leaned against him. "I didn't realise you gave such nice hugs, Ishida-kun," she murmured, as she pressed her face against his shoulder, dampening it with tears. "You've changed, but I think it could be a good change. I like the way you look when you're happy. Kurosaki-kun is very lucky."

And then she was quiet.

For some reason, Uryu found himself saying things that would never, ever have been possible if he hadn't become a vampire. "Inoue-san, did you know that I always adored you? Truly and utterly adored you? Even though I never let myself admit it to myself because I knew you loved him, I loved spending time with you in the club, even before everything became crazy with Soul Society. Maybe I could have fallen for you."

"E-eh?!" she squeaked. She tried to pull away from the embrace but Uryu wouldn't let her.

"Surprised?" he murmured. "You're the idol of the school. What's wrong with it? And don't forget you stripped in front of me in Soul Society."

"I... did...?" She scratched her head, frowning as he let her go. "I don't remember. Are you sure you didn't dream it, Ishida-kun?"

"No I didn't dream it! What do you take me for?!"

_I bet you would have remembered if you'd stripped in front of Kurosaki!_

He moved to push his glasses up his nose before remembering that they weren't there. Instead, he sat and ran his hands across the fabric to smooth it. Moments like this were the exact reason why he'd never let himself think about Orihime too much.

Orihime chuckled as she wiped her eyes. "You really are funny now that you're a vampire. I could get used to this."

Uryu glanced at her. She was still wiping her eyes and then she started rummaging in her school bag for a tissue.

_No, you couldn't get used to it._

Because as sweet as she was, she was strong enough to stick to what was right. And if Uryu was in her shoes, he'd be determined to force vampires to go back to being human. "Don't think that just because I hugged you means that I trust you, Inoue-san. You're not as harmless as you make yourself out to be and you know that."

She froze, her smile faltering tightly, but then she nodded. "I know. But I hope one day it will be OK again and that we can go and see the leaves together. Ishida-kun... we're worried because Urahara-san says that vampires have a habit of running away when they're threatened. I don't want you to run away."

"If I have to run to keep Kurosaki then I will. So don't threaten us. We've asked you all to leave us alone."

"I know." Orihime wiped her face once more with the tissue. "It'll be OK, Ishida-kun. Somehow it will be OK. I really like seeing you like this. I wish you'd tell me things more often because so many times you keep everything to yourself. I think it must have hurt you to be so quiet for all these years."

At times, she really could identify something with perfect accuracy. Uryu felt his hands tensing around the fabric. "Why do you think that I'll do anything to avoid going back to who I was?" he said softly.

* * *

Orihime had stayed with Uryu in the sewing room until the bell rang for lunch since she'd only be shouted at if she turned up half way through a sports lesson with no kit anyway. She'd always liked those little moments when she was alone with Uryu. He always behaved differently if you were alone with him; a little more talkative and more honest since Uryu was the type to worry about how things would be perceived if more people were around. In groups he usually said nothing, and if you did ask him something you'd mostly like get no more than a one-word answer. Or on bad days he'd tell you to go away.

He'd been quiet as Orihime sat there doing her Japanese homework. Out of the corner of her eye, she'd watched him though. He'd smiled a lot as he'd concentrated on his sewing. She'd seen him sew before and she didn't remember him smiling. In fact, she wasn't sure if she'd ever seen him smiling before this whole vampire incident.

_He looks very different. I can see why so many of the girls like him. I never thought about it before. Though Ishida-kun, I've always adored you too. You're not Kurosaki-kun, but I've always liked you. Especially whenever we were alone together and I saw how nice you could be. _

Though it had been a shock as he'd murmured that confession in her ear. Part of her thought he might have been saying it to cheer her up somehow, but that part of her was the silly part. The more serious side told her that he'd meant it.

_There are so many sides to you that I never knew about. I think it's good that you can speak your thoughts though._

She'd always wished she could do that. She'd barely been able to confess to Ichigo while he'd been unconscious that time before she'd gone to Hueco Mundo. And even though she'd told herself she'd do it when they left school, she was more likely to have said something dumb about the weather instead. Or by the time she had found the right words to say Ichigo would probably have wondered off. or said something about Uryu. he did that a lot now that she looked back and thought about it.

_But even if I had told him a week ago or a year ago I don't think any good would have come of it. _

And he looked adorable with Uryu. She often stared a bit with a warm face at the photos Rukia had sent her. She didn't hate Uryu. She could never hate him. Especially because the two of them together worked.

And seeing them was far from the most unpleasant thing. In fact, she couldn't take her eyes off of them when they were wrapped around each other...

_I'll need to stop doing that,_ she told herself. _It's probably not right. But they do look so nice together! I hope I'm not weird._

And maybe looking at those pictures would help to stop her chest from aching a little. Because it ached a lot recently and sometimes it was enough to make her cry and murmur Ichigo's name for a bit. So it was nice to think a different line of thought, even if it probably wasn't right for nice girls to think like that.

"Inoue." Across the school yard, Chad waved. He had two cans of apple juice in his hand from the vending machine. Orihime loved that apple juice but she never had the spare money for the machine.

"Thank you, Sado-kun! Did you really get that for me?" She smiled.

"Sure. I was waiting for you. Kuchiki told me that you skipped sports to go and find Ishida. Is he OK? I saw he wasn't in any of his classes."

"He's in the handicrafts club room."

"Good. I was worried he was going to stop coming. This is a crucial year and he's done so well. He can't let it fall apart now."

Orihime paused. True, that was the bad side to being a vampire. Uryu didn't care about school and she had a feeling he might never go to another lesson again. "But he's so happy, Sado-kun," she murmured. "And confident. And different. It's nice. I like him like this. I think he hated himself before. And I..."

_Spoke to him so nicely. And asked him not to leave town. Even though..._

"I don't want to spoil everything for him," she said softly. "But we have to change him back don't we? I don't want to. I tried to make friends with him again, even though I should be telling him and Kurosaki-kun to get as far away from here as possible because we're never going to leave them alone." She clutched the apple juice can in her hand. Her face was wet again. She wasn't supposed to cry anymore. She'd told herself after Ichigo lost his powers that she wouldn't cry and be helpless anymore. "I hate myself."

"It will be OK," said Chad. "At first it will be hard, but things are always OK again eventually. Don't forget that Ishida was bitten against his will. We have to give him the choice of whether he wants to be with Ichigo or not."

"I know but..."

_It still hurts so much. I'm so sorry, Ishida-kun... _

And she was still weaker than all of them. Uryu had been able to tell her what he really thought of her; he'd even said it without a red face or a single stammer. She could barely say anything. She couldn't even tell him outright that she'd loved Ichigo more than anything else and vowed to love him for ten lifetimes or more.

_But you are amazing too, Ishida-kun. And whatever you want after this I'll give it to you. I hope you and Kurosaki-kun will still be together, but if that's not what you really want then I'll give you whatever you want because I'll owe you and I could never, never take Kurosaki-kun away from you. And I'm sure I could fall in love with you if I tried; if that's what you really, really wanted. Whatever happens, I'll always love both of you._

Chad gently took the can of apple juice from her hand and opened it for her. "There you go. Juice makes everything better. It's OK to cry though, so don't worry."

Orihime smiled as she wiped her eyes. She even managed to laugh a little. _I love you too, Sado-kun._

* * *

**By the way everyone... have I told you that this story is nearing its end...? I've got three different drafts of the finale at the moment...**

**Sorry, I like to tease like that )**


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